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Why Did You Stay? by Rebecca Humphries, review: A tender, funny look at toxic relationships

The actor split up with boyfriend seann walsh after he was caught kissing his strictly come dancing partner. her experience has led to an unflinching, wise memoir.

When the actress Rebecca Humphries’ boyfriend, the comic Seann Walsh, was photographed kissing his Strictly Come Dancing partner in 2018 , their five-year relationship was suddenly blinded by paparazzi camera flashes.

After releasing a statement on Twitter , in which she suggested her ex’s dishonest and manipulative behaviour was nothing new, Humphries began to rebuild her life. But while she has since written for Vogue and The Guardian, spoken at the House of Commons, and been cast in numerous prominent acting roles, one question has continued to haunt her: if he was so dreadful, why did she stay?

Never naming Walsh (he is referred to throughout simply as “He”), Why Did You Stay? traces two timelines: one charting their burgeoning relationship until its rupture, the other chronicling its aftermath.

Combined with compelling accounts of Humphries’ cognitive dissonance in the face of a toxic dynamic (“We’re just fiery, we’re Cathy and Heathcliff, Burton and Taylor, Sid and Nancy”), the memoir builds an appropriately complex picture of a complex relationship – one in which no one gets off scot-free, not even the author herself. “This isn’t a story about how a monster corrupted a princess,” writes Humphries. “It’s about how a relationship began to change as a result of two people’s sense of self-worth, and I have empathy for both parties.”

From the romance’s fairy-tale beginning to its crushing end, Humphries is unflinching in her portrayal of her ex’s insidious emotional abuse as well as her own behaviour: “Screaming when the windows were wide open, storming off in shopping centres, crying at parties.”

She scrutinises her dating history and family dynamics along with unrealistic ideals absorbed from pop culture (“My heart is not very bright,” she writes. “I hold Walt Disney and Richard Curtis accountable for this”) and enduring gender stereotypes: “I’ve been too much and upset those nice quiet boys,” she describes herself as thinking at one point. “I have failed at being what a girl is supposed to be.”

Throughout the book, she examines gendered “rules” about speaking – too loudly, out of turn, saying the wrong thing. Agonising over whether or not to comment in the immediate aftermath of her very public break-up, for instance, Humphries is advised by an older friend to stay quiet. The friend warns her that “I’d never come out on top here – she’s seen this hundreds of times… and the bloke always gets away with it because that’s the world we’re living in.”

However well-meaning the counsel, she finds it hard not to draw parallels between that advice and the tacit silencing she experienced with her ex (“Everything I’ve had to say for such a long time has been contested or counteracted or just shut down”).

“Why did you stay?” is anything but a simple question, and Humphries is nothing if not comprehensive in her answer – but she is also funny, tender and wise. Explaining how her ex chipped away at her self-esteem and sense of reality until she questioned her own instincts and emotions, Humphries writes about feeling almost vindicated by the revelation of his infidelity.

After all, if she had been right all along – rather than “crazy”, like “He” told her she was perhaps healing was possible. If Why Did You Stay? rings bells with many readers, it will surely give them hope, too.

Why Did You Stay? , by Rebecca Humphries, is published by Little, Brown, at £18.99

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Why Did You Stay? by Rebecca Humphries review — how to bounce back from a toxic relationship

Rebecca Humphries never wanted to write a book. “All I ever really want to do, at any given time, is dance about to gay songs,” she writes in her author’s note. “But I need to. I need to do it because several years after surviving a relationship (one that culminated in the bin-fire of all break ups), I am still seeing with my own eyes some of the coolest, cleverest, sexiest women allowing their brilliance to be drained in the name of love. I need to do it because, as Jane Fonda says, ‘Once you know what’s wrong and you stay silent, you’re part of the problem.’ ”

Humphries is not staying silent and the result is a funny, brave and honest book that will

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Why Did You Stay?: The instant Sunday Times bestseller: A memoir about self-worth Hardcover – 8 November 2022

'Fierce. Game-changing. Urgently necessary. Brilliant, brilliant and did I say brilliant?'

Emma thompson, 'pacy, vivid, compelling and very, very funny ... it will help so many', marian keyes, 'a fucking classic. required reading for all women and men and i believe it's going to be the book of 2022', bryony gordon, 'fuck, this is good. every page feels important', actor, writer and hopeless romantic rebecca humphries had often been called crazy by her boyfriend. but when paparazzi caught him kissing his strictly come dancing partner, she realised the only crazy thing was believing she didn't deserve more. forced into victimhood by the story, rebecca chose to reclaim her power, posting her thoughts on social media, including advice for other women who might be experiencing what she realised she'd managed to escape: a toxic, oppressive relationship. a flood of support poured in, but amongst the well-wishes was a simple question with an infinitely complex answer: 'if he was so bad, why did you stay' empowering, unflinching and full of humour, this book takes that question and owns it. using her relationship history, coming of age stories and experiences since the scandal during strictly , rebecca explores why good girls are drawn to darkness, whether pop culture glamourises toxicity, when a relationship 'rough patch' becomes the start of a destructive cycle, if women are conditioned for co-dependency, and - ultimately - how to reframe disaster into something magical., 'so funny and heart-breaking. so stunningly written. for any woman who has been asked 'why did you stay', rebecca humphries' book is a hilarious and brilliant read', susan wokoma, 'very, very good', pandora sykes, 'a magical, magical book', 'so thoughtful and moving and funny and sad and great, i love it so, so much. i resented having to put it down', daisy buchanan, 'her thought-provoking story should be required reading for anyone in a relationship', daily mirror, 'a memoir every woman needs to read'.

• Print length 416 pages
• Language English
• Publisher Sphere
• Publication date 8 November 2022
• Dimensions 15.88 x 3.81 x 24.13 cm
• ISBN-10 1408714795
• ISBN-13 978-1408714799
• See all details

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• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sphere; 1st edition (8 November 2022)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 416 pages
• ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1408714795
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1408714799
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 15.88 x 3.81 x 24.13 cm
• 247 in Feminist Literary Criticism
• 466 in Men's Gender Studies
• 501 in Women Writers in Women Studies

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Why Did You Stay?: A Memoir About Self-Worth By Rebecca Humphries

⭐⭐⭐⭐ 4/5 Stars – A blazingly honest memoir of abuse, very public heartbreak, and self-(re)discovery. Inspiring, uplifting and funny

Format : Kindle Read : January 2024

I heard about this book when Rebecca was on Jameela Jamil’s iWeigh podcast . I don’t watch Strictly Come Dancing , nor do I pay attention to Twitter, so I had no idea not the tabloid drama in 2018, and I had no idea who Seann Walsh is! I still don’t outside the context of Rebecca, but he seems too “laddy” for me and I don’t think I’d find his stand up funny if it mainly consists of girlfriend jokes. I did find Rebecca very engaging on the podcast, so I stuck her book on my Kindle watch list until one day it was magically 99p!

For those who, like me, had no idea about any of this – Rebecca’s boyfriend of 5 years is (apparently) a comedian famous enough to get on Strictly in 2018. While on the show he did the cliché thing and had an affair with his (married) dance partner, and was careless enough to get papped kissing her.. which has the added sting of taking place on Rebecca’s birthday while she was home alone crying . This photo was all over the tabloids.

Rebecca released her own statement via Twitter which launched her as a leading voice for women who are victims of gaslighting, and who have been trapped in coercive controlling relationships.

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Pub date:  07.07.2022 Imprint:  Sphere  Format: HB (£18.99), EB (£18.99)  ISBN: 9781408714799/ 0751584806/ 1405552004 Editor: Emily Barrett Agent: Cathryn Summerhayes, Curtis Brown

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Why Did You Stay?: The instant Sunday Times bestseller: A memoir about self-worth Hardcover – Jan. 17 2023

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'Fierce. Game-changing. Urgently necessary. Brilliant, brilliant and did I say brilliant?' EMMA THOMPSON 'Pacy, vivid, compelling and very, VERY funny ... it will help so many' MARIAN KEYES 'A fucking classic. Required reading for all women and men and I believe it's going to be the book of 2022' BRYONY GORDON 'Fuck, this is good. Every page feels important' LUCY VINE Actor, writer and hopeless romantic Rebecca Humphries had often been called crazy by her boyfriend. But when paparazzi caught him kissing his Strictly Come Dancing partner, she realised the only crazy thing was believing she didn't deserve more. Forced into victimhood by the story, Rebecca chose to reclaim her power, posting her thoughts on social media, including advice for other women who might be experiencing what she realised she'd managed to escape: a toxic, oppressive relationship. A flood of support poured in, but amongst the well-wishes was a simple question with an infinitely complex answer: 'If he was so bad, why did you stay?' Empowering, unflinching and full of humour, this book takes that question and owns it. Using her relationship history, coming of age stories and experiences since the scandal during Strictly , Rebecca explores why good girls are drawn to darkness, whether pop culture glamourises toxicity, when a relationship 'rough patch' becomes the start of a destructive cycle, if women are conditioned for co-dependency, and - ultimately - how to reframe disaster into something magical. 'The best [book] about relationships since Three Women' CAROLINE SANDERSON, THE BOOKSELLER 'So funny and heart-breaking. So stunningly written. For any woman who has been asked 'why did you stay?', Rebecca Humphries' book is a hilarious and brilliant read' SUSAN WOKOMA 'Very, very good' PANDORA SYKES 'A magical, magical book' GLAMOUR 'So thoughtful and moving and funny and sad and great, I love it so, so much. I resented having to put it down' DAISY BUCHANAN 'Her thought-provoking story should be required reading for anyone in a relationship' DAILY MIRROR 'A memoir every woman needs to read' RED MAGAZINE ' This book isn't an ice-cold revenge opus; it's a diary of self-discovery, a celebration of friendship, resilience and finding one's self-worth...is it worth the hype? Absolutely: I had to stop myself from reading it one grateful gulp' LAURA PULLMAN, STYLE

• Print length 416 pages
• Language English
• Publisher Sphere
• Publication date Jan. 17 2023
• Dimensions 15.88 x 3.81 x 24.13 cm
• ISBN-10 1408714795
• ISBN-13 978-1408714799
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About the author.

Rebecca has written for Vogue, Elle, the Guardian and the Telegraph on relationships, singledom and womanhood. In 2019 she spoke at the House of Commons on behalf of the organisers of the Women's March London about gaslighting and the media. As an actress, Rebecca has most recently appeared in Ten Percent (Amazon Prime), The Crown (Netflix) and Friday Night Dinner (Channel 4). All of the above has happened following her public break up in 2018.

Product details

• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sphere (Jan. 17 2023)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 416 pages
• ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1408714795
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1408714799
• Item weight ‏ : ‎ 658 g
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 15.88 x 3.81 x 24.13 cm
• #1,062 in Psychology & Counselling Books on Human Sexuality
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• #1,488 in Abusive Family Relationships

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Why Did You Stay?: The instant Sunday Times bestseller

By rebecca humphries.

7th July 2022

Price: £18.99

Health & Personal Development / Family & Health / Family & Relationships / Dating, Relationships, Living Together & Marriage

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‘Fierce. Game-changing. Urgently necessary. Brilliant, brilliant and did I say brilliant?’

Emma thompson, ‘pacy, vivid, compelling and very, very funny … it will help so many’, marian keyes, ‘a fucking classic. required reading for all women and men and i believe it’s going to be the book of 2022’, bryony gordon, ‘fuck, this is good. every page feels important’, actor, writer and hopeless romantic rebecca humphries had often been called crazy by her boyfriend. but when paparazzi caught him kissing his strictly come dancing partner, she realised the only crazy thing was believing she didn’t deserve more. forced into victimhood by the story, rebecca chose to reclaim her power, posting her thoughts on social media, including advice for other women who might be experiencing what she realised she’d managed to escape: a toxic, oppressive relationship. a flood of support poured in, but amongst the well-wishes was a simple question with an infinitely complex answer: ‘if he was so bad, why did you stay’ empowering, unflinching and full of humour, this book takes that question and owns it. using her relationship history, coming of age stories and experiences since the scandal during strictly , rebecca explores why good girls are drawn to darkness, whether pop culture glamourises toxicity, when a relationship ‘rough patch’ becomes the start of a destructive cycle, if women are conditioned for co-dependency, and – ultimately – how to reframe disaster into something magical., ‘the best [book] about relationships since three women’, caroline sanderson, the bookseller, ‘so funny and heart-breaking. so stunningly written. for any woman who has been asked ‘why did you stay’, rebecca humphries’ book is a hilarious and brilliant read’, susan wokoma, ‘very, very good’, pandora sykes, ‘a magical, magical book’, ‘so thoughtful and moving and funny and sad and great, i love it so, so much. i resented having to put it down’, daisy buchanan, ‘her thought-provoking story should be required reading for anyone in a relationship’, daily mirror, ‘a memoir every woman needs to read’, red magazine, ‘ this book isn’t an ice-cold revenge opus; it’s a diary of self-discovery, a celebration of friendship, resilience and finding one’s self-worth…is it worth the hype absolutely: i had to stop myself from reading it one grateful gulp’, laura pullman, style, newsletter signup.

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Why Did You Stay?

By Rebecca Humphries (author)

"Forced into victimhood by a story that flung her into the public eye, Humphries’ funny, heartfelt and brave memoir is an unflinching look at why she stayed with Him and how it went from being fairytale perfect to one of the most public break ups ever after a Strictly affair."

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Press reviews.

Rebecca Humphries is not a victim. She changed that when she turned to Twitter in 2018 after her famous boyfriend was caught kissing his Strictly Come Dancing partner. She'll never forget those words that turned her world on an axis, "The Sun have got pictures of me and the dancer kissing". As Humphries' says: "How is it that the coolest, cleverest, sexiest women allow their brilliance to be drained in the name of love?" 

How does any woman?

The cheater is never named in the book (I still don't know His name), but I suppose that is the point. Humphries and the cheater met on the set of a TV Show. It was a whirlwind romance, like a dream come true. They had an urgency for life, for mischief, for being famous. Fun.

Until it wasn't. Until the mischief, the fame, the fun was focussed on someone else.

Her ex's dishonest, manipulative, controlling behaviour wasn't new. Multiple affairs came out afterwards. But for the first time his behaviour forced her to lift the lids of boxes in her brain that she had squirrelled away, too scared to confront. The book maps two timelines, chapter by chapter and it's a rollercoaster of emotion,  of revelations, admissions, painful truths, of strength, of bravery.

She stayed because it was perfect, because she was "lucky", because she has a sense of humour (and didn't mind being the butt of his jokes), because of money, because she had nothing else (after she became isolated), because she was made to feel psychotic. 

She left because enough was enough, she knew the truth, she is capable of much more, her friends supported her through it,  because it wasn't love.

This could have been done so differently, but it's done with grace, with honesty, with empathy. “This isn’t a story about how a monster corrupted a princess,” writes Humphries. “It’s about how a relationship began to change as a result of two people’s sense of self-worth, and I have empathy for both parties.”

Free of the toxicity, Humphries began to rebuild her life. She has since appeared in multiple high-profile TV shows, written for Vogue, Elle, The Guardian and The Telegraph and has spoken at the House of Commons about gaslighting and the media. 

But there was one question that was posed of her that day in 2018 on Twitter: "If he was so bad, why did you stay?" It's a question that has never left her, a question that she felt compelled to answer, a question that Humphries more than answers with this book.

Why Did You Stay? is a story of empowerment, of taking back control of your life, of giving hope to others who feel lonely, trapped and oppressed. It's a story of self worth, of getting back your sparkle and I am sure it will help others. And it's more than that, it's a bloody good read. Humphries is funny, she's fierce and I have no doubt that she has more brightness on the horizon.

Deborah Maclaren

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Why Did You Stay? Synopsis

Actor, writer and hopeless romantic Rebecca Humphries had often been called crazy by her boyfriend. But when paparazzi caught him kissing his Strictly Come Dancing partner, she realised the only crazy thing was believing she didn't deserve more.

Forced into victimhood by the story, Rebecca chose to reclaim her power, posting her thoughts on social media, including advice for other women who might be experiencing what she realised she'd managed to escape: a toxic, oppressive relationship. A flood of support poured in, but amongst the well-wishes was a simple question with an infinitely complex answer: 'If he was so bad, why did you stay?'

Empowering, unflinching and full of humour, this book takes that question and owns it. Using her relationship history, coming of age stories and experiences since the scandal during Strictly, Rebecca explores why good girls are drawn to darkness, whether pop culture glamourises toxicity, when a relationship 'rough patch' becomes the start of a destructive cycle, if women are conditioned for co-dependency, and - ultimately - how to reframe disaster into something magical.

About This Edition

Rebecca Humphries Press Reviews

Her thought-provokingstory should be required readingfor anyone in a relationship - Daily Mirror

'The best [book] about relationships since Three Women' CAROLINE SANDERSON, THE BOOKSELLER

'So funny and heart-breaking. So stunningly written. For any woman who has been asked 'why did you stay?', Rebecca Humphries' book is a hilarious and brilliant read' SUSAN WOKOMA

'Very, very good' PANDORA SYKES

'A magical, magical book' GLAMOUR

'So thoughtful and moving and funny and sad and great, I love it so, so much. I resented having to put it down' DAISY BUCHANAN

'A memoir every woman needs to read' RED MAGAZINE

'This book isn't an ice-cold revenge opus; it's a diary of self-discovery, a celebration of friendship, resilience and finding one's self-worth...is it worth the hype? Absolutely: I had to stop myself from reading it one grateful gulp' LAURA PULLMAN, STYLE

About Rebecca Humphries

Rebecca has written for Vogue, Elle , the Guardian and the Telegraph on relationships, singledom and womanhood. In 2019 she spoke at the House of Commons on behalf of the organisers of the Women's March London about gaslighting and the media. 

As an actress, Rebecca has most recently appeared in Ten Percent (Amazon Prime), The Crown (Netflix) and Friday Night Dinner (Channel 4). 

All of the above has happened following her public break up in 2018.

Collections Featuring This Book

August 2022 Book Club Recommendation: Why Did You Stay? by Rebecca Humphries

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Why Did You Stay?: The instant Sunday Times bestseller: A memoir about self-worth Paperback – 6 July 2023

'Fierce. Game-changing. Urgently necessary. Brilliant, brilliant and did I say brilliant?' EMMA THOMPSON

'is it worth the hype absolutely' laura pullman, style, actor, writer and hopeless romantic rebecca humphries had often been called crazy by her boyfriend. but when paparazzi caught him kissing his strictly come dancing partner, she realised the only crazy thing was believing she didn't deserve more. a flood of support poured in on social media, but amongst the well-wishes was a simple question with an infinitely complex answer: 'if he was so bad, why did you stay' empowering, unflinching and full of humour, this book takes that question and owns it. using her relationship history and experiences since the scandal during strictly , rebecca explores why good girls are drawn to darkness, whether pop culture glamourises toxicity, when a relationship 'rough patch' becomes the start of a destructive cycle, if women are conditioned for co-dependency, and - ultimately - how to reframe disaster into something magical..

• Print length 416 pages
• Language English
• Publisher Sphere
• Publication date 6 July 2023
• Dimensions 12.45 x 3.3 x 19.56 cm
• ISBN-10 0751584819
• ISBN-13 978-0751584813
• See all details

From the Publisher

Product description

Book description, about the author.

Rebecca has written for Vogue, Elle, the Guardian and the Telegraph on relationships, singledom and womanhood. In 2019 she spoke at the House of Commons on behalf of the organisers of the Women's March London about gaslighting and the media. As an actress, Rebecca has most recently appeared in Ten Percent (Amazon Prime), The Crown (Netflix) and Friday Night Dinner (Channel 4). All of the above has happened following her public break up in 2018.

Product details

• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sphere (6 July 2023)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Paperback ‏ : ‎ 416 pages
• ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0751584819
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0751584813
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 12.45 x 3.3 x 19.56 cm
• 47 in Family & Marriage Biographies
• 424 in Partnership & Relationships
• 500 in Women's Biographies

About the author

Rebecca humphries.

Discover more of the author’s books, see similar authors, read author blogs and more

Customer reviews

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The New Age

Book Review: Aussie Rock Anthems by Glen Humphries

Wollongong-residing journalist and author Humphries (a longtime music and sport expert) here selects 40 Australian tunes that qualify as the best, most anthemic songs ever created in this great southern land (get it?), with Crowded House ( Don’t Dream It’s Over ) making the cut because they’re as much Aussie as Kiwi, according to fans.

And immediately many out there will be ready to fight him about some of his decisions, but most are spot-on, and each chapter comes with a short but sweet history of the band, details about their other bangers, and how the chosen song has been celebrated, misinterpreted, and repurposed over the years. The Divinyls’ how-did-it-get-past-the-censors? I Touch Myself , for example, was retooled after the death of frontwoman Chrissy Amphlett, and used in a powerful ad campaign about breast cancer awareness.

The introduction makes important points, notably that the newest ditty here is Gotye’s 2011 monster Somebody That I Used To Know , and that’s because it takes at least ten or so years for a hit to become properly classic. Humphries also admits that there are significantly fewer offerings here by women or First Nations bands than those by white guys, but that’s more to do with the past state of the Australian music industry. And yet Missy Higgins ( Scar ) and Kylie Minogue ( Can’t Get You Out Of My Head ) get a look-in, as does Warumpi Band ( Blackfella/Whitefella ) and the various versions of Yothu Yindi’s Treaty .

There’s plenty of humour too, with Glen pondering just what the Hell the lyrics to The Vines’ Get Free actually mean, explaining that there isn’t much sun in April down Cuba way (sorry, Dragon), and how he personally hates Daddy Cool’s Eagle Rock . A lot.

Plus, if you have a Spotify account (whether you admit to it or not), this author has compiled a searchable playlist, so you can listen to the songs in any order. Or maybe you’d prefer to dig out the CDs or vinyl – if, of course, you have some way to play the damn things.

Aussie, Aussie… Aussie?

Aussie Rock Anthems by Glen Humphries is published by Gelding Street Press, RRP $39.99

geldingstreetpress.com

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