college essays about parents

College Essay: My Parents’ Sacrifice Makes Me Strong

After living in Texas briefly, my mom moved in with my aunt in Minnesota, where she helped raise my cousins while my aunt and uncle worked. My mom still glances to the building where she first lived. I think it’s amazing how she first moved here, she lived in a small apartment and now owns a house. 

My dad’s family was poor. He dropped out of elementary school to work. My dad was the only son my grandpa had. My dad thought he was responsible to help his family out, so he decided to leave for Minnesota   because  of  many  work opportunities .   

My parents met working in cleaning at the IDS  C enter during night shifts. I am their only child, and their main priority was not leaving me alone while they worked. My mom left her cleaning job to work mornings at a warehouse. My dad continued his job in cleaning at night.   

My dad would get me ready for school and walked me to the bus stop while waiting in the cold. When I arrived home from school, my dad had dinner prepared and the house cleaned. I would eat with him at the table while watching TV, but he left after to pick up my mom from work.   

My mom would get home in the afternoon. Most memories of my mom are watching her lying down on the couch watching her  n ovelas  –  S panish soap operas  – a nd falling asleep in the living room. I knew her job was physically tiring, so I didn’t bother her.  

Seeing my parents work hard and challenge Mexican customs influence my values today as a person. As a child, my dad cooked and cleaned, to help out my mom, which is rare in Mexican culture. Conservative Mexicans believe men are superior to women; women are seen as housewives who cook, clean and obey their husbands. My parents constantly tell me I should get an education to never depend on a man. My family challenged  machismo , Mexican sexism, by creating their own values and future.  

My parents encouraged me to, “ ponte  las  pilas ” in school, which translates to “put on your batteries” in English. It means that I should put in effort and work into achieving my goal. I was taught that school is the key object in life. I stay up late to complete all my homework assignments, because of this I miss a good amount of sleep, but I’m willing to put in effort to have good grades that will benefit me. I have softball practice right after school, so I try to do nearly all of my homework ahead of time, so I won’t end up behind.  

My parents taught me to set high standards for myself. My school operates on a 4.0-scale. During lunch, my friends talked joyfully about earning a 3.25 on a test. When I earn less than a 4.25, I feel disappointed. My friends reacted with, “You should be happy. You’re extra . ” Hearing that phrase flashbacks to my parents seeing my grades. My mom would pressure me to do better when I don’t earn all 4.0s  

Every once in  awhile , I struggled with following their value of education. It can be difficult to balance school, sports and life. My parents think I’m too young to complain about life. They don’t think I’m tired, because I don’t physically work, but don’t understand that I’m mentally tired and stressed out. It’s hard for them to understand this because they didn’t have the experience of going to school.   

The way I could thank my parents for their sacrifice is accomplishing their American dream by going to college and graduating to have a professional career. I visualize the day I graduate college with my degree, so my  family  celebrates by having a carne  asada (BBQ) in the yard. All my friends, relatives, and family friends would be there to congratulate me on my accomplishments.  

As teenagers, my parents worked hard manual labor jobs to be able to provide for themselves and their family. Both of them woke up early in the morning to head to work. Staying up late to earn extra cash. As teenagers, my parents tried going to school here in the U.S .  but weren’t able to, so they continued to work. Early in the morning now, my dad arrives home from work at 2:30 a.m .,  wakes up to drop me off at school around 7:30 a.m . , so I can focus on studying hard to earn good grades. My parents want me to stay in school and not prefer work to  head on their  same path as them. Their struggle influences me to have a good work ethic in school and go against the odds.  

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"My Father's Passing"

University of Michigan

2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

250 - 650 words

Why This Essay Works:

• Navigates Tragedy Gracefully : Writing about a tragedy like a loss of a parent is a tricky topic for college essays. Many students feel obligated to choose that topic if it applies to them, but it can be challenging to not come across as trying to garner sympathy ("sob story"). This student does a graceful job of focusing on positive elements from their father's legacy, particularly the inspiration they draw from him.
• Compelling Motivations : This student does a great job of connecting their educational and career aspirations to their background. Admissions officers want to understand why you're pursing what you are, and by explaining the origin of your interests, you can have compelling and genuine reasons why.

What They Might Change:

• Write Only From Your Perspective : In this essay, the student writes from their hypothetical perspective as an infant. This doesn't quite work because they likely wouldn't remember these moments ("I have no conscious memories of him"), but still writes as though they do. By writing about things you haven't seen or experienced yourself, it can come across as "made up" or inauthentic.

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Narrative Essay: I Love My Parents

Parents are the closest people that we have in our lives, whether we realize it or not. They love us not because we are smart, beautiful, successful or we have a good sense of humour, but just because we are their children. I, too, love mom and dad simply because they are my parents, but I think I would have felt the same even if they weren’t. I love who they are as people, each with their own individual traits – and, together, forming an amazing super-team that’s made me who I am today and taught me what life is all about.

My mother is a cheerful, chatty perfectionist who seems to always find something to get excited about and who can talk for hours about animals and flowers. She is never afraid to speak her mind and she can be very convincing when she wants to. She sometimes get upset a bit too easily, but she is just as quick to forgive and forget. I love mom for all that she is – even when she’s angry – for all that she has done for me, and for all that she’s taught me. My mom has been through a lot throughout the years, but she always kept fighting.She taught me to never lose hope even in the direst of moments, and she showed me how to look for happiness in the small things. She’s been trying to teach me to be more organized as well, but hasn’t succeeded yet. I love her for that too.

My father is quiet, patient and calm, and he has an adorable hit-and-miss sense of humour. I may not always find his jokes that funny, but I love him for trying. Dad almost never gets angry and he is always polite, friendly and nice to everyone. He is not the one to verbalize emotions, but he always shows his feelings through sweet gestures and little surprizes. He is the pacifist in our family and never goes against mom’s wishes, but he runs a large company witha firm hand. I love my father for all these characteristics and for all he’s sacrificed to build a better life for us. He’s worked day and night to ensure we afford good education and have a rich, wonderful childhood, and he has passed up many great opportunities for the benefit of our family. I love dad because he’s taught me that you cannot have it all in life, but with hard work and dedication, you can have what matters most to you.

Mom and dad may be very different people, but they complement each other perfectly. Together, they formed a super-team that was always there – and, thankfully, still is – to provide comfort, nurturing, and support and help me grow as a person. Their complementary personalities bring balance in our family, and each of them steps in whenever they are needed the most. Together, they taught me to believe in myself and have turned me into a fighter. Their care and dedication towards me and each other has served as an example of what healthy relationships should be like, and I love and admire them for that.

I love my parents because they are my parents, my good friends, my heroes, my role models, my safe haven, my pillars of strength.I am who I am today thanks to them, and I know that their support and affection will play an essential role in what I will become in the future.All I can hope is that, when I have children of my own, I will be half as good a parent as they were to me.

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The Parents’ Role in the College Essay

To the ever-under-appreciated parents of teenagers,

We know how hard it is to be parents. You’re walking a fine line between wanting what is best for your children and trying to let them make their own decisions (and, let’s be honest, their own mistakes). Your child will only apply to college once, and it can be difficult to know how to balance your parental instincts with letting your student take ownership of the process. The good news is that we are here to make your life a little easier by allowing you to take a step back while we harangue your child to help get him where he needs to be in the admissions process.

Let’s address what’s probably the most stressful part of our journey together: the college essays. We will tackle this in three parts: first, we will discuss how most kids approach their essays, how Passport Admissions works with your child on their essays, and the best role of parents in this process.

How Most Kids Approach the College Essay

Most seventeen-year-olds think, “What can I say that will make colleges accept me?” They write essays based on what they believe colleges want to hear. And as a result, most kids make crucial mistakes in their college essays.

Mistake #1 - Most kids brag too much in their college essays.

How many valedictorians apply to college? All of them. How many class presidents? All of them. How many team captains? You get the idea.

There is virtually nothing that kids can brag about that will sell themselves to an admissions office. When a student tries to brag about himself in his essay: a) it doesn't work, and b) the essay blends into the pile of all the other applicants who are trying to do the same thing.

Mistake #2 - Most kids write essays that look and sound the same.

A former admissions officer for UVA, Parke Muth, once compared the college essay to a Big Mac.  Not because the essays are tasty and not because they have layers (though it can be argued that the college essay, like the Big Mac, is hazardous to your health). No, the college essay is like a Big Mac, because no matter where you go, the essays look and taste the same. Thus, Muth coined the term McEssay to refer to the generic college essay.

McEssays typically fall into one of the following five flavors. You will want to avoid these topics at all costs.

• The hard work essay - "Being captain of the soccer team involved a lot of hard work, but I learned important lessons in leadership and perseverance."
• The family trip to Europe essay - "Going to France showed me just how different other cultures are."
• The summer program for gifted youth essay - "I am so fortunate to have been able to attend the National Youth Leadership Conference."
• The athletics essay - "We lost the championship, but we came together as a team."
• The saving the world through community service essay - "Building houses in Mexico was so rewarding."

We know these experiences have been meaningful to many of our students. But writing a McEssay makes a student blend in with every other applicant, so we have to find a unique topic.

Mistake #3 - Most kids polish all of the personality out of their essays.

Most students write their college essays by committee, seeking input and feedback from multiple teachers and parents, who - despite good intentions - will polish all of the life and personality out of the essay. Your teenager should sound like a teenager in his college essay. Consider the following excerpts:

"My nascent drum career began when I was twelve. Learning to play the drums was quite challenging at first, because I had little formal training and needed to learn more about rhythm and chord structure in order to contribute to my band. After rehearsing for innumerable hours, I eventually was able to keep up, but I still needed more help. I decided to get lessons to help improve my overall musical knowledge and particularly improve my music theory. In the end, the lessons paid off, and our band was better than ever."

"A band's drummer is the stupid one. He is the one paid not to write songs or to think, but to sit in the back and hit his instrument, as he is clearly far too idiotic to do anything more. I am a drummer, and while I like to think I am above this stereotype, I do sit in the back, behind all the “real musicians,” blissfully ignorant of ongoing deliberation over “What capo he needs to be in to be in the key of G”, perfectly happy that I understand none of it and absolutely satisfied with my lack of involvement, or responsibility to the band’s success. This being said, I am a good drummer, and when a musician needed a moron - I was a solid choice."

Which sounds like a high school student, and which like a parent? In revising an essay, it is crucial to keep the voice of the student and not to make it sound like it was written by a 40-year-old.

The Primary Purpose of the College Essay

The primary purpose of the college essay is to let the college get to know you and like you. That's it. When evaluating a college essay, we ask:

• What do we learn about you?
• Do we like you?
• Is it interesting?
• Is it generally free from grammatical and stylistic errors?

What role should parents play?

You know your kid a lot better than we do. We can't tell you exactly how much parental involvement will be the right amount for your student.

But we can at least share this insight about the college essays: the students who have had the most success have been the ones whose parents have been involved the least. Almost without fail, the students who have been accepted into their top choice colleges have been the ones whose parents have trusted their student to write great essays, helped their student only when asked, and otherwise stayed out of the process entirely.  And of course, these are the same families that seem to most enjoy the last year of their child living at home.

So there you have it. We hope that you are as excited as we are to help your student write the best essays she can write. Remember that we are not only experts on this stuff, but we really, really enjoy doing it. For us, editing is fun, and getting to know your student and his passions is what makes our jobs interesting and worthwhile.

If you have questions or want help with your college essay, schedule a free introductory meeting with one of our college advisors.

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177 College Essay Examples for 11 Schools + Expert Analysis

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

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Ultimate Guide to Writing Your College Essay

Tips for writing an effective college essay.

College admissions essays are an important part of your college application and gives you the chance to show colleges and universities your character and experiences. This guide will give you tips to write an effective college essay.

Want free help with your college essay?

UPchieve connects you with knowledgeable and friendly college advisors—online, 24/7, and completely free. Get 1:1 help brainstorming topics, outlining your essay, revising a draft, or editing grammar.

Writing a strong college admissions essay

Learn about the elements of a solid admissions essay.

Avoiding common admissions essay mistakes

Learn some of the most common mistakes made on college essays

Brainstorming tips for your college essay

Stuck on what to write your college essay about? Here are some exercises to help you get started.

How formal should the tone of your college essay be?

Learn how formal your college essay should be and get tips on how to bring out your natural voice.

Taking your college essay to the next level

Hear an admissions expert discuss the appropriate level of depth necessary in your college essay.

Student Stories

Student Story: Admissions essay about a formative experience

Get the perspective of a current college student on how he approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about personal identity

Get the perspective of a current college student on how she approached the admissions essay.

Student Story: Admissions essay about community impact

Student story: admissions essay about a past mistake, how to write a college application essay, tips for writing an effective application essay, sample college essay 1 with feedback, sample college essay 2 with feedback.

This content is licensed by Khan Academy and is available for free at www.khanacademy.org.

5 College Essay Tips for Parents

So, if you’re a parent or guardian, take heart, you have an important place in this process (even as you see your kids growing up). And high schoolers, don’t worry, we respect your space. Make sure to forward this list to mom and/or dad so that they know what to do.

1. Start early.

When you enter the insanity that is college admissions, everyone needs to be on the same page about timeline. There is A LOT of writing involved, so the earlier you get started, the better. The Common App prompts are already out so now is a great time to look them over and do some preliminary brainstorming. Parents, this could mean that you do a little nagging in the next few months, or it could mean that you help your kids get organized and protect their time by making sure their schedules are not overloaded. (Pro tip: there are only 24 hours in a day.)

2. Understand that this is a process.

As we tell our students all the time, great writing doesn’t happen overnight. It won’t happen in one sitting and it definitely won’t happen without effort. It’s important to remember this when looking over early drafts. Don’t be too hard on your college hopefuls, and don’t let them be too hard on themselves. Frustration and procrastination are often symptoms of perfectionism, and you can play a key role in helping manage stress and expectations.

3. Make yourself a resource.

Your memory is a goldmine. You remember SO MUCH that your kids may not be able to recall. Encourage them to ask you questions, to look through old photo albums with you, or to mine your memory in other ways. The kinds of details that you can recall may spark new ideas and will definitely contribute colorful details to the narrative.

4. Remember whose essay this is.

As much as you may know or remember, at the end of the day, this essay is not supposed to represent your memories or feelings or worldview. While your thoughts may be helpful during the early phases of the writing process, it’s important for you to step back as the essay develops. You know, like that time you finally let go of the bicycle seat.

5. Know when it’s time to ask for outside help.

Under the intense pressure of the college admissions process, tempers can flare and otherwise copacetic relationships can become strained. As much as parental involvement can help during the writing process, that doesn’t mean it definitely will help. Sometimes it can feel like extra pressure and scrutiny. Distance can be your friend, and there’s no shame in calling for a mediator during this trying time. That’s what we’re for. Our lines are always open.

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Should Parents Help Students Write College Essays?

What’s covered:, how involved should parents be with college applications, 4 ways parents can help with college essays, 4 elements of a good college essay, where your student can get their essay edited.

High schoolers applying to college go through a lot—from filling out multiple applications, keeping up impressive grades and extracurriculars, and writing dozens of college essays. Parents might be tempted to help out their kids and ease some of their burden during this busy time. But, should parents help write their kids’ college essays?

When it comes to helping out with the college process, parents should act as more of a coach or cheerleader than a director. Rather than hovering over your student and telling them when to fill out certain applications, what to write in their essays, and what safety schools to apply to, take a step back and support them without smothering them.

As a coach, parents can guide their student to keep them on schedule, have productive conversations about different college options and financial aid, and offer feedback and edits on essays. It’s important that parents don’t step in and play the game for themselves, so to speak, but rather assist their kid in reaching their full potential.

Another role parents can play is the cheerleader: encourage them through this challenging time and keep them engaged even when they get burnt out. The application process isn’t easy for students or parents, but having someone in your corner to cheer you on will help motivate students to keep going.

Since parents should not be at the helm, they should not do anything active like writing essays. More importantly, a parent directly writing any part of an essay would be plagiarism, and admissions officers can pick up on it via software and their intuition. Essays must be written with the student’s authentic voice and ideas. Here are some things parents can do:

1. Proofread Drafts

Every essay a student writes will likely have to go through multiple drafts—each time tweaking grammar, cutting down words, adding details, moving around sentences, etc. Parents can help expedite this process by reading over the essay drafts and providing constructive feedback. Important details to check for include:

• Are there spelling errors or typos?
• Could the grammar be elevated with literary devices or different diction?
• Does this sound like my student speaking or a thesaurus? 
• Does the essay flow in a manner that is easy to follow?

2. Brainstorm Essay Topics

Figuring out how to answer each prompt can be difficult and exhausting when students have so many essays to write. This is a good place for parents to jump in and “coach” their students; sit down for a few hours and start brainstorming topics and themes that could work for various prompts. 

A good way to organize brainstorming sessions is to break down essay prompts into categories ( “Why This Major?”, “Extracurricular”, “Community Impact”, “Overcoming Challenges” , etc.) and come up with five to ten stories or answers for each category.

3. Help Students Recall Childhood Memories and Stories

Along the lines of brainstorming, parents can play a huge role in reminding their students of anecdotes from their childhood that could make for a good essay. While you shouldn’t recount stories from your point of view that would color their perspective, parents can show pictures and videos, talk through some of their fondest memories of their kids, and fill in any gaps in stories kids partially remember.

4. Help Students Reflect on Who They Are

One of the important aspects of college essays is the ability to engage in self reflection and think about your character development and growth. This can be a lot for a teenager to do on their own, so it’s a good place for parents to provide some extra support.

Walk your child through some brainstorming exercises. Ask questions like “What three words would best describe you”, “What’s a good example of how you approach a challenge/new idea/etc”, “What are your personal and career goals”,  and “How have you grown as a person since you were younger” .

Another way parents can help their kids is by ensuring they cover the bases that make a good essay. Make sure to check out our ultimate guide to college essays to learn how to write a good essay, but below are a handful of the things to check for:

1. Answers the 4 Core Questions

When it comes to a strong college essay, there are four questions that should be answered. These are:

• “Who Am I?”
• “Why Am I Here?”
• “What is Unique About Me?”
• “What Matters to Me?”

These might seem like daunting philosophical questions, but with an intentional, well-crafted essay, you’ll find that the answers to these questions come naturally. Perhaps a more helpful way to look at these questions would be the following:

• What are your personality traits?
• What was your journey through high school? What were you interested in and found meaningful? How have you evolved as you have grown?
• Between your interests, skills, way of thinking, and personality, why are you different from other applicants?
• What is something you care deeply about above all else?

2. Author’s Voice is Authentic and Approachable

Essays are the one opportunity for admissions committees to hear directly from the applicant. For that reason, the essay should sound like a high school student wrote it. Without being overly casual, make sure the tone of the essay reads like a conversation with a friend.

Don’t rely too heavily on a thesaurus and don’t worry about stuffing the essay full of metaphors and figurative language—this isn’t an essay for an English class!

3. Shows Instead of Tells

While the advice to “ show not tell ” in your writing might not be new, it could not be more important. What truly sets apart a good essay from a great essay is the ability to paint a picture for the reader with imagery. 

A sentence like this, “I love the thrill of competing in the Math Olympiad,” simply tells the reader what the student enjoys. However, look at the difference when a sentence shows us what a student loves: “ Badum. Badum. Badum. The heavy thumping of my heart echoed painfully in my ears as a droplet of sweat made a lazy trail down my back. Adrenaline coursing through my veins, I whispered “ 7? ” as the time ran out.”

3. Avoids Cliches

Imagine reading through thousands upon thousands of essays every year as an admissions officer. After your 50th essay about scoring the winning goal at the soccer game, being changed by a volunteer trip to another country, or some other overused topic, you’ll no longer connect with these stories.

No matter how beautifully an essay is written, a cliche topic just makes admissions officers want to groan and get to the next one. Make sure your essay doesn’t fall into a traditional cliche topic to make it engaging and enjoyable to read.

4. Includes an Anecdote or Personal Story

Anecdotes bring excitement and personal depth to essays. They provide an easy way for a student to show what was happening in the moment that had such a profound impact on them. Including an anecdote also facilitates personal reflection because there is a solid foundation established. Once the reader can connect with a story, they are able to better empathize with the student and appreciate their character.

Editing college essays is a great way for parents to get involved, but it can be time consuming to read through multiple essays. Luckily, CollegeVine offers two avenues for students to get their essays reviewed. 

Our free Peer Essay Review tool allows students to get a free review of their essay from another student. Students can also improve their own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If students want a college admissions expert to review their essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for your student to improve their chances of getting into their dream school!

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

Essays That Worked

The essays are a place to show us who you are and who you’ll be in our community.

It’s a chance to add depth to something that is important to you and tell the admissions committee more about your background or goals. Below you’ll find selected examples of essays that “worked,” as nominated by our admissions committee. In each of these essays, students were able to share stories from their everyday lives to reveal something about their character, values, and life that aligned with the culture and values at Hopkins.

Read essays that worked from Transfer applicants .

Hear from the class of 2028.

These selections represent just a few examples of essays we found impressive and helpful during the past admissions cycle. We hope these essays inspire you as you prepare to compose your own personal statements. The most important thing to remember is to be original as you share your own story, thoughts, and ideas with us.

The Art of Imperfection

In this essay, Stella dives into her journey in the art world and the challenges that came with it.

Finding Purpose in Trivial Projects

Anjali uses her essay to share her experiences with making miniatures. We see how this passion influences everything she does.

Korean Sticky Notes

Nancy’s essay details the responsibilities she had at a young age and her resulting spirit of exploration.

Being the Handyman

Sarah chronicles her experience as her household “handyman” and the versatility of skills she acquired over the years.

To Stand Out or Fit In

Caroline’s essay focuses on their experiences developing and accepting their identity. We see how Caroline navigates the challenge of being themself while also trying to fit in with their peers.

A Growing World

Calla highlights her early wonder by dreaming of future expeditions and playing them out in her backyard. As Calla grows, so does her curiosity and ambition.

More essays that worked

We share essays from previously admitted students—along with feedback from our admissions committee—so you can understand what made them effective and how to start crafting your own.

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Standing Out From the Crowd

By Ron Lieber

• May 17, 2013

“I wonder if Princeton should be poorer.”

If you’re a high school senior trying to seduce the admissions officer reading your application essay, this may not strike you as the ideal opening line. But Shanti Kumar, a senior at the Bronx High School of Science, went ahead anyway when the university prompted her to react in writing to the idea of “Princeton in the nation’s service and in the service of all nations.”

Back in January, when I asked high school seniors to send in college application essays about money, class, working and the economy, I wasn’t sure what, if anything, would come in over the transom.

But 66 students submitted essays, and with the help of Harry Bauld, the author of “ On Writing the College Application Essay ,” we’ve selected four to publish in full online and in part in this column. That allowed us to be slightly more selective than Princeton itself was last year.

What these four writers have in common is an appetite for risk. Not only did they talk openly about issues that are emotionally complex and often outright taboo, but they took brave and counterintuitive positions on class, national identity and the application process itself. For anyone looking to inspire their own children or grandchildren who are seeking to go to college in the fall of 2014, these four essays would be a good place to start.

Perhaps the most daring essay of all came from Julian Cranberg, a 17-year-old from Brookline, Mass. One of the first rules of the college admissions process is that you don’t write about the college admissions process.

But Mr. Cranberg thumbed his nose at that convention, taking on the tremendous cost of the piles of mail schools send to potential students, and the waste that results from the effort. He figured that he received at least $200 worth of pitches in the past year or so.

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Home — Application Essay — National Universities — How Having Immigrant Parents Changed Me: Personal Experience

How Having Immigrant Parents Changed Me: Personal Experience

• University: Texas A&M University

About this sample

Words: 869 |

Published: Jul 18, 2018

Words: 869 | Pages: 2 | 5 min read

In this essay, I will explore the profound impact of having immigrant parents on my upbringing and perspective. Growing up, I had the unique opportunity to bridge the gap between my life in the United States and the experiences of my parents in Belarus, a country with its own set of challenges and hardships. These contrasting worlds have shaped my values, work ethic, and resilience, ultimately influencing the person I have become today.

Say no to plagiarism.

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'Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned'?

6:00 AM, small industrial town of Zhodino, Belarus. Summer 2008. I reluctantly boarded the bus, immediately noticing that it was absolutely packed. The bus, of course, was to my grandmother’s dacha, a cottage where she grew and tended to what I have always considered to be an absurd amount of crops, all by herself. After standing cramped like sardines for an hour, and then walking along a muddy path for twenty minutes, we finally arrived at my grandparents’ dacha. I was absolutely exhausted, but we were just getting started. At any given moment in the next seven hours I was being forced to dig or pick some sort of crop out of the ground.

Through all of my tantrums and complaining that day, my grandmother continued working and just kept telling me to do the same. When 2 PM finally rolled around, I was so happy to be going back to her apartment that I found the energy to run through most of the muddy path. Once we got to the bus stop, however, I was devastated to learn that we were not going home, but to the local farmer’s market. My grandmother spent the next 2 hours selling the crops she had unearthed that day, while I was passed out with my face on the raggedy old tablecloth she used.

For my parents, that full day of manual labor was a very common way to spend their summer days growing up. Before they immigrated to the United States in 1998, they had grown up in Belarus, which was a part of Soviet Union at the time. Even as a self-reliant nation today, the country continues to struggle under a dictatorship; a relic of the totalitarian Past. Not quite North Korea, but with certain similarities. And while I was raised in a much more financially stable household in Texas, my parents helped me to understand how fortunate I was by bringing me back to their home country with them most summers growing up.

I have seen what it is like to stay in a country in crisis, and after every summer I have returned home to Texas with a more positive outlook on life. I’ve been able to encourage myself through even the most stressful points in my life by simply thinking about how much more serious my problems may be if my parents hadn’t worked as hard as they did to make it out of Belarus. If I hadn’t returned to Belarus every summer and seen how food prices were always rising and how my grandmother’s pension was always dropping, it is unlikely that I would be able to understand other people’s misfortunes and suffering as well as I am now. Because of these humbling experiences, I’ve spent a plentiful amount of time volunteering for CCA Food Pantry, the Texas Ramp Project, and the North Texas Food Bank.

Since my parents have always had a serious understanding of what can happen without self-sufficiency and hard work, I was raised somewhat differently than most of the kids around me were. While my some of my friends’ parents would essentially nanny them through many of their problems, I was taught from a very young age that I would have to take care of certain things on my own. When I was eight years old and told my dad I was interested in woodworking, he gave me a hammer, nails, and some wood and said “Build a table then.” When I told my mom I wanted to join my first basketball league when I was seven, she told me “That’s great, but you’ll have to sign up yourself, I’m very busy at work right now.”

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Events like these were clearly nowhere near traumatic, and my parents have always given me everything I’ve ever needed. However, they did help me to learn self-sufficiency and perseverance, because while I had never built anything in my life or used a computer for anything other than gaming, I had to figure these problems out on my own. Because of the way I was raised, I realized from a young age that complaining wouldn’t get me anywhere. Resiliency, however, would. I eventually built that table and figured out how to sign up for that league, and while the table only had one leg and I accidentally sent my registration to the YMCA in Arkansas, I learned through episodes like these that if I was dedicated enough, I could achieve my goals. Being raised by two immigrant parents has been very influential in my maturation. The values they have instilled in me, along with the perspective I’ve gained by visiting their old homes in Belarus, have made me a more determined and unselfish person. I would not be where I am today if it wasn’t for my unorthodox upbringing.

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The Parent-Child Relationship in the College Years

Many parents stay enmeshed in their children’s emotional life in college, for better or worse.

This is an edition of The Wonder Reader, a newsletter in which our editors recommend a set of stories to spark your curiosity and fill you with delight. Sign up here to get it every Saturday morning.

Updated at 1:59 p.m. ET on September 3, 2024.

There’s a moment, toward the end of a parent’s trip to drop their child off at college, when it feels like the world is changing. Many describe the joy and loss that mingle in those five minutes walking back to the car. But some parents stay quite enmeshed in their child’s emotional life long after they leave campus. My colleague Faith Hill reported earlier this summer on the new age of endless parenting, and how parents stay in much closer touch with their college-age children than they did a few decades prior.

Before they say goodbye to their kids, many parents will give parting advice. But “usually,” Ezekiel J. Emanuel wrote this week, that advice “will be wrong.” “When it comes to their children, parents are innately conservative,” Emanuel writes. “They want them to be successful and to lead fulfilled and happy lives. To many parents, that means counseling them to pursue what seem like paths to guaranteed success.” But that conservatism doesn’t help students get the most out of their college experience, Emanuel argues.

Today’s newsletter explores how the parent-child relationship changes during the college years, and how to help guide students through all that college brings.

The Worst Advice Parents Can Give First-Year Students

By Ezekiel J. Emanuel

Today’s college students will have ample time to figure out their careers. Before that, encourage them to take risks.

Read the article.

What the Freshman Class Needs to Read

By Niall Ferguson and Jacob Howland

It is no small part of a liberal education to show students the broad range of meaningful lives they might aspire to lead.

What I Learned About Life at My 30th College Reunion

By Deborah Copaken

“Every classmate who became a teacher or doctor seemed happy,” and 29 other lessons from seeing my Harvard class of 1988 all grown up

Still Curious?

• How college changes the parent-child relationship : The distance can actually strengthen the bond, Alia Wong wrote in 2019.
• The new age of endless parenting : More grown kids are in near-constant contact with their family. Some people call this a failure to launch—but there’s another way to look at it, Faith Hill writes.

Other Diversions

• Marijuana is too strong now.
• The growing gender divide, three minutes at a time
• The words people write on their skin

I recently asked readers to share a photo of something that sparks their sense of awe in the world.

“Here’s a picture from our backyard, after a summer shower last week,” Kristine S., 49, from Portland, Oregon, writes. “I noticed this raindrop-covered web among the cedar branches. Spider webs are one of those ‘everyday wonders’ that seem never to cease to amaze me!”

I’ll continue to feature your responses in the coming weeks. If you’d like to share, reply to this email with a photo and a short description so we can share your wonder with fellow readers in a future edition of this newsletter or on our website. Please include your name (initials are okay), age, and location. By doing so, you agree that The Atlantic has permission to publish your photo and publicly attribute the response to you, including your first name and last initial, age, and/or location that you share with your submission.

This article originally misspelled the last name of Ezekiel J. Emanuel.

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College essays matter. Here's how to write one that stands out | College Connection

Students facing the college application process typically dread one component: the Common App essay. 

Students are presented with six essay prompts, as well as a seventh option, which is “topic of your choice.” Students therefore have limitless possibilities for this essay which will be carefully reviewed by each college to which the student applies.

The goal of college admissions officers is to learn about the student who is applying: personal qualities, struggles, ambitions, priorities. On other parts of the application a student’s “data” is detailed. So, this is not the place to write about one’s SAT scores, GPA, or intended major, or to enumerate one’s activities. It is the place to write about an event, situation, or life circumstance that has influenced the student’s attitudes, goals, and perceptions of life.

The options are limitless. Students can write about life occurrences that impacted them: an illness, a learning disability, a relocation. They can use a sport, club, organization, or volunteer group as the overarching framework within which they learned important life lessons. 

More: The biggest key to college acceptance | College Connection

One student’s essay, which went viral after its author was accepted to a multitude of Ivy League schools, focused on lessons she learned from visits to Costco over the years. In short, students can write about anything that has impacted them – hopefully in a positive way.

Then, students face supplemental essays. Many colleges, including almost all the most competitive ones, require an essay that is specific to the school. Typically, the question is along the lines of, “Why do you want to attend this institution?” or “Why did you choose your particular major and how will our school prepare you to meet your future goals?”

More: These are the latest trends in college admissions | College Connection

Colleges are aware that students typically apply to 8 to 12 different schools, and they are trying to discern “demonstrated interest,” or, in other words, the likelihood of a student enrolling if accepted. So, students should utilize each supplemental essay as an opportunity to demonstrate their interest in the particular college, and should specifically state the courses, programs, study abroad options, internships, and any other characteristics that make the institution a perfect match for their college ambitions.

By showing enthusiasm for each school and sharing their attributes through the Common App and supplemental essays, students will greatly enhance their prospects of experiencing a successful college application process.   

Susan Alaimo is the founder & director of Collegebound Review, offering PSAT/SAT ® preparation & private college advising by Ivy League educated instructors. Visit CollegeboundReview.com or call 908-369-5362 .

More From Forbes

More parents are saving for college, but worry about rising costs.

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College tuition prices are rising, but families are saving more to pay for college.

In the face of the current student loan crisis, most parents want to help their kids avoid student loan debt. Some send their kids to less expensive schools to keep costs down, whereas others help pay the tuition bill if they can. There are also parents who make sure their kids apply for as many college scholarships as possible, as well as those who prioritize saving for their children's college as much as their own retirement.

A new study from Fidelity also shows parents are taking college savings more seriously today than in the past. The Fidelity Investments 2024 College Savings Indicator Study revealed that 74% of survey respondents were saving for college for their kids in 2024, compared to 58% in 2007 (the first year the study was conducted).

Not only that, but 77% of survey respondents agreed that college was worth it — even after taking the rising costs of tuition and fees, room and board and other expenses into account.

College Savings Shortfalls Explained

Unfortunately, Fidelity's survey revealed some considerable disparities when it came to how much parents are saving versus what they'll actually have to pay. In fact, Fidelity data showed that parents saving for college may only have enough to cover 30% of anticipated costs for each dependent. This is a strange stat considering 73% of Fidelity survey respondents said saving for college was the top financial priority in their lives.

There are several reasons many parents may not be saving enough.

The first is the fact college is so expensive to begin with. After all, CollegeBoard data shows that average tuition and fees for public, four-year in-state schools came in at $11,260 nationally for the 2023-24 academic year. And remember, that figure is for just one year of college, and it doesn't include the costs of room and board, books and supplies, and other living expenses required for kids in school.

Best High-Yield Savings Accounts Of 2024

Best 5% interest savings accounts of 2024.

There's also a huge lack of transparency when it comes to how much families actually have to pay in the end. Analysis from the Brookings Institution notes that the "sticker price" of colleges has become "an increasingly poor indicator of college prices for all students, regardless of family income" since most families do not actually pay advertised costs for tuition and fees. And when you're not sure how much you'll actually owe, coming up with a plan to save enough over the timeline you have becomes that much more difficult.

This fact also shows in the Fidelity survey results, which revealed that 30% of parents were “not sure” what the full sticker price of college would wind up being. Beyond that, 55% of parents were using “their own best guess” to estimate college costs.

How To Start Saving For College

While nobody has a crystal ball, it seems pretty safe to say college costs are going to continue to rise — at least at the rate of inflation affecting everyday services and goods. However, the Fidelity survey revealed that 93% of parents were worried how inflation could impact future college costs.

Whether inflation makes things worse or not, there's really only one thing parents can do now to get ahead of the game. They can (and should) start saving for college tuition and fees if that's their priority. After all, having something saved is better than nothing, and saving early on gives families more time for their funds to grow.

Just remember to make sure you're on track to retirement first. After all, your dependent can take out student loans for college , but you won't have the same options if you need to borrow money to fund your retirement.

If you want to prioritize college savings as your kid approaches college age, consider these tips.

Open A 529 College Savings Plan

Martha Kortiak Mert of Saving for College says any family trying to save for higher education should look into 529 savings plans for their "unparalleled tax benefits and flexibility." All states (other than Wyoming) offer their own plan , and some states offer income tax deductions or credits for contributions families make.

Also note that money saved in a 529 college savings plan grows tax-free until it's used for eligible higher education expenses, at which point withdrawals can be made without any tax consequences.

"Parents shouldn't overthink or procrastinate saving," says Mert. "The best thing is to start early and save often to enjoy the benefits of compounding earnings and to maximize college funds."

Automate And Prioritize Savings

Kevin Ladd of Scholarships.com says that, no matter which vehicle you use for college savings, you should try to put away as much as you can afford. This may be easier if you have regular savings deducted from your paycheck or bank account on a specific day so you don't forget.

If you feel you don't have any financial wiggle room for savings, Ladd says to look closer at your regular spending habits. If you cut back on dining out or other routine expenditures, for example, you can potentially put away quite a bit more than you might think.

"Spending $200 a week on dining out adds up to over $10,000 per year," he says.

Ask Others For Help

Patricia Roberts of Gift of College also recommends asking others in your circle to contribute to college costs. However, she doesn't necessarily mean asking for cash outright. Instead, you can mention to friends and extended family that you are making it a priority to save for higher education and would appreciate a contribution of any size for birthdays, holidays and other special occasions in lieu of more traditional gifts that are quickly outgrown in size or interest.

"You may be surprised how many people who love your child would welcome the opportunity to lend a hand by investing in their future," says Roberts.

Also ask your employer if they would be willing to make an annual contribution or ongoing match to your college savings account. Roberts says a growing number of employers are doing this as a valuable financial wellness benefit, and that "you won't know if you don't ask."

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Parents struggle to let go as kids head to college

• Erica Pandey
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Illustration: Sarah Grillo/Axios

Many first-year college students from different states, backgrounds and majors have one thing in common: stressed-out parents struggling with the separation.

Why it matters: Parents have grown more involved in, and more anxious about, their kids' lives. That's changing the experience of going to college — and growing up.

• They’re using tech to track their kids , micromanaging orientation week and even having dorm sleepovers .

Zoom out: Headlines and stats detailing a worsening teen mental health crisis and pandemic-induced learning loss are stressing parents out.

• “When your kid is having stress or anxiety or depression and they’re living away from home, it’s heartbreaking,” says Lisa Heffernan, an author and the founder of a popular parent Facebook group called Grown and Flown.

On top of that, parents are just closer to their young adult kids than they used to be, she notes.

• 41% of parents say their young adult children rely on them a fair amount or a great deal for emotional support, according to a Pew Research Center survey .

“Some parents are holding onto a level of involvement that’s maybe healthy for a toddler deep into their kids’ teen years, when it maybe becomes unhealthy,” says Mathilde Ross, a senior staff psychiatrist at Boston University. “All of the messages out there are, ‘Look out for this! Look out for that!’ There are no messages like, ‘Hey, your kid can do this.’”

• “So, for a lot of parents, it’s unclear where the off ramp is.”

Zoom in: Parents’ stress is on display in online forums and Facebook groups— where parents are asking questions and offering emotional support to one another — as college students head back to school.

• "Sometimes I’m shocked at the level of what they’re asking about," says Jen Selby, who has two daughters in college in California. “Like, 'does my kid need shower shoes?’ I don’t know if the kids really need that help or if the parents just feel like they need to control everything.”
• Parents ask about the minute-to-minute details of orientation, ask other parents for advice on their kids’ roommate woes and where to shop for basic toiletries.

Counterpoint: Part of parents’ micromanaging is just them missing their kids and wanting to do the little things for them, Heffernan says.

• And "if you're asking in a Facebook group, that means you’re not bugging your kid."

The bottom line: “It’s a little bit painful for parents when kids go to college because it feels like they fully move on with their lives,” Ross says.

• “What I want parents to know is that their college-age kids are constantly thinking about their parents, they just don’t show it. Whenever something really good or really bad happens, the first thing they’re thinking about is their parents.”

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September 3, 2024

This article has been reviewed according to Science X's editorial process and policies . Editors have highlighted the following attributes while ensuring the content's credibility:

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trusted source

Communication helps parent relationships with new college students but has limits

by Washington State University

When young adults first go off to college, more communication with parents generally leads to better relationships, but parents should avoid always initiating it, according to a study led by Washington State University researchers.

In a paper published in the journal Emerging Adulthood , WSU Assistant Professor Jennifer Duckworth and co-authors found that phone, text, video or in-person communication made first-year students feel better about the relationship with their parents. Students also felt better about the relationship when parents offered support or advice, and when they discussed important topics, such as studying and friendships. However, researchers found negative associations when parents initiated nearly all of the communication.

"That could be indicative of over-involved parenting," said Duckworth, a faculty member in WSU's human development department. "It can be a fine line, but students with so-called 'helicopter parents' could have a more negative view of their relationship with those parents."

The research shows that it's beneficial for parents to regularly stay involved in students' lives, provide support and discuss topics important to students without overwhelming them.

"Text messages are great for a quick check-in that can be very beneficial to the relationship quality," Duckworth said. "If a student feels they have a good relationship, that's indicative of well-being and positive behaviors like more studying and less alcohol and drug use."

The study also shows that frequent communication improves the relationship between familial units.

"We looked at daily levels of parent/student communication, and days with communication were better for the relationship than days without any communication," said Duckworth. "Similarly, days with more communication were better than days with less communication."

The researchers were surprised by how consistent the findings were.

"On days when they communicated, and students were honest with their parents and parents offered support or advice, the students reported they felt more positive about their relationship the following day," she said.

The study looked at the response results of 367 first-year WSU students who took a daily survey for seven consecutive days. The students were compensated up to $30 if they completed every survey, which was texted to their phones.

Breaking down the data, the authors found several differences. Female students reported more days of communication than males, with more time spent communicating. They discussed friendships and relationships more, but spent less time discussing time management than males.

Meanwhile, members of racially or ethnically minoritized groups reported fewer days communicating with their parents. While they spent less time communicating in general, students from minoritized groups spent more time talking on the telephone and video chatting with their parents than other groups. They also reported being less honest and spending less time talking about studying or grades, and drinking or substance use.

"We don't know why this is the case," Duckworth said. "It could reflect cultural or contextual differences, or differences in parenting styles. It's definitely an area for future research."

Duckworth wrote the paper with WSU colleagues Katherine Forsythe, Brittany Cooper and Laura Hill along with Matthew Bumpus, director of research and community impact at Innovia Foundation.

Provided by Washington State University

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