Nursing Bay

College personal statement examples and writing tips.

A crucial step in your nursing journey is learning how to write a personal statement that resonates with admissions committees and vividly portrays your passion for healthcare. This collection of amazing personal statement examples is curated to guide and inspire you as you articulate your aspirations, experiences, and motivation to pursue nursing.

What is a Personal Statement?

A personal statement is a written narrative that typically forms a significant part of an application to universities, colleges, or professional programs, particularly in fields like nursing. It’s an opportunity for junior year applicants to present themselves beyond test scores and grades, offering insights into their personalities, experiences, goals, and motivations.

In a personal statement, applicants explain why they are interested in a specific field of study or profession, what they hope to achieve through the program, and how their background and experiences have prepared them for this path. It’s a chance to highlight unique attributes, significant life experiences, challenges overcome, or special achievements that make them an ideal candidate for the program.

Why Read Personal Statement Examples?

Reading personal statement essay examples is immensely beneficial for several reasons, especially when preparing your own statement for applications to nursing programs:

  • Inspiration and Ideas: Examples can inspire you and provide ideas on structuring your statement, what kind of content to include in your application essay, and how to convey your story and passion effectively.
  • Understanding Expectations: They offer insight into what admissions committees look for, helping you understand the level of detail, tone, and approach that resonates successfully in such applications.
  • Learning from Others: Seeing how others have articulated their experiences, challenges, and aspirations can guide you in reflecting upon and articulating your own journey and motivations.
  • Avoiding Common Mistakes: By examining a range of examples, you can identify common pitfalls and clichés to avoid, ensuring your statement stands out and feels genuine.
  • Gaining Confidence: Reading successful common app essays can boost your confidence, showing you that crafting a compelling narrative that combines personal experiences with professional aspirations is possible.
  • Diverse Perspectives: Examples offer a glimpse into the diversity of paths and motivations that lead people to nursing, potentially broadening your perspective and enriching your own approach to writing your statement.

How Long Should a Personal Statement Be?

The length of your personal statement should ideally align with the guidelines provided by the institution or program you are applying to. Personal statements are expected to be concise yet comprehensive, often ranging around 500 to 650 words , translating to about one to two pages. 

This word count allows enough space to clearly articulate your experiences, motivations, and aspirations without overloading the reader with information. It’s important to always adhere to the program’s specific word or character limits to demonstrate your ability to follow instructions and present your thoughts.

What Should a Personal Statement Include?

A well-written college admissions essay should include several key elements to effectively communicate your suitability for the program or position you are applying for. Here’s what to typically include:

Introduction

Your personal statement should begin with an engaging introductory paragraph that captures the essence of your motivation for pursuing your chosen field. This could be a brief narrative of a defining moment, an experience that ignited your passion, or a clear articulation of your interest and enthusiasm.

The introduction sets the tone and should intrigue the reader, providing a glimpse into your unique journey and motivation. It’s important that this section hooks the reader’s attention and provides a compelling reason to continue reading your statement.

Academic and Professional Background

In this section, brainstorm and detail your relevant academic and professional experiences that have prepared you for this next step. Highlight key academic achievements, coursework, research, or projects that align with the field you are pursuing.

Also, include any relevant work experience, internships, or positions that have given you practical skills and insights. This part of the statement is crucial for showcasing your foundational knowledge and preparedness for advanced study or professional development and gaining a scholarship in your chosen area.

Extracurricular Activities and Volunteering

Your involvement in extracurricular activities and volunteering can significantly enrich your personal statement. This section should reflect how these activities have contributed to your personal growth, skills development, or understanding of your field.

Whether it’s a hobby, leadership roles in clubs, participation in sports teams, or volunteer work in community organizations, these experiences demonstrate your broader interests, commitment, and ability to balance multiple responsibilities. It’s an opportunity to show aspects of your character and values that academic achievements alone might not convey.

Personal Qualities and Skills

Reflect on and draft the personal qualities and skills that make you suited for your chosen path. This might include traits like resilience, empathy, critical thinking, or effective communication. Use specific examples or experiences to demonstrate how you have developed and applied these traits.

This personal reflection not only provides depth to your statement but also gives the admissions committee a clearer picture of who you are as an individual, beyond academic and professional achievements.

Career Goals and Aspirations

Discuss your career aspirations and how the program or position you are applying for aligns with these goals. This section should convey a clear vision of where you see yourself in the future and how the specific program or role will be a stepping stone toward that vision.

It’s important to show that you have a direction and purpose and that you see this opportunity as integral to your career journey. This not only demonstrates foresight and planning but also shows your commitment and seriousness about the path you are choosing.

Reasons for Choosing the Specific Program or Institution

Clearly articulate why you are applying to this particular program or institution. Discuss what specific aspects of the program, faculty, institution’s philosophy, or opportunities available are particularly attractive to you and why they resonate with your goals and preferences.

This shows that you have done your research and are making a well-informed decision. It also indicates that you have a genuine interest in what the program or institution uniquely offers, rather than a generic application.

Conclude your statement with a strong, memorable closing that encapsulates your main points and reaffirms your enthusiasm and suitability for the program or career. This is your final opportunity to leave a lasting impression, summarizing why you believe you are an ideal candidate.

The conclusion should tie back to your opening, creating a cohesive narrative that leaves the reader with a clear understanding of your passion, commitment, and readiness for the next step in your academic or professional journey.

What Does an Admissions Officer Look for in a Personal Statement?

When reviewing a personal statement, admission officers are looking for several key elements to assess the suitability of a candidate for their program:

  • Clarity of Purpose: Admissions officers want to see a clear understanding of why the applicant wants to pursue a particular field or program. The statement should convincingly articulate the candidate’s passion, motivation, and how the program aligns with their career goals.
  • Personal Insight and Self-Reflection: A strong personal essay offers insight into the applicant’s personality, experiences, and the factors that have shaped their decision to pursue a specific path. Admissions officers look for depth of reflection and a sense of how past experiences have driven the candidate’s current ambitions.
  • Relevant Experience and Skills: It’s important for the statement to highlight any relevant academic, professional, or volunteer experiences that demonstrate preparedness for the program. Admissions officers are interested in how these experiences have contributed to the development of skills and knowledge pertinent to the field.
  • Writing Quality and Structure: The ability to communicate effectively and coherently through writing is crucial. Admissions officers pay attention to the overall quality of writing, including grammar, clarity, coherence, and the ability to organize thoughts logically.
  • Individuality and Authenticity: They seek to understand what makes each applicant unique. A personal statement should reflect the individual’s authentic self, showcasing unique perspectives, diverse experiences, and personal growth.
  • Commitment and Passion: Demonstrating genuine enthusiasm and a strong commitment to the field is essential. Admissions officers look for candidates who are likely to thrive in the program and contribute positively to their field.
  • Alignment with Program Values and Goals: Candidates who show that their personal and professional values align with those of the program or institution often stand out. Admissions officers look for indications that the candidate has researched the program and understands how it fits into their broader aspirations.
  • Future Potential: Finally, they are interested in the applicant’s potential for future success and contribution to the field. A compelling statement should give a sense of the candidate’s ambition to go to college and how they intend to utilize the education and opportunities provided by the program to achieve their long-term goals.

The Best Personal Statement Examples

Here are some nursing statement examples that illustrate effective writing styles, clear articulation of goals, and the ability to connect personal experiences to broader career or academic aspirations:

Personal Statement Example #1 

Personal statement example #2, college essay example #3, personal statement example #4, application essay example #5, personal statement example #6, personal statement example #7, personal statement example #8, personal statement example #9, personal statement example #10, personal statement example #11, personal statement example #12, personal statement example #13, personal statement example #14, personal statement example #15, child nursing personal statement examples, community nurse personal statement examples, key takeaways for writing a great personal statement.

When reflecting on the nursing personal statement examples provided, several key takeaways emerge that are crucial for anyone crafting their statement. These insights are vital for effectively conveying your passion, commitment, and suitability for a career in nursing:

  • Clearly articulate your personal motivation for choosing nursing.
  • Highlight your relevant healthcare experiences and achievements.
  • Specify your interest in any particular nursing specialty.
  • Showcase qualities and skills that make you suitable for nursing.
  • Outline your long-term professional aspirations in nursing.
  • Acknowledge the challenges and rewards in the nursing profession.
  • Express dedication to ongoing learning and professional development.
  • Ensure clarity, structure, and coherence in your statement.
  • Customize your statement for each specific nursing program.
  • Maintain authenticity and genuineness throughout your statement.

Final Thoughts: Personal Statement Essay Examples

These nursing personal statement examples and key takeaways provide valuable insights for anyone aspiring to enter the nursing freshman year. They demonstrate the importance of a well-crafted statement that blends personal motivation, relevant experiences, and a clear understanding of the nursing profession’s demands and rewards. 

An effective personal statement is not only a reflection of your qualifications and aspirations but also a testament to your passion, empathy, and commitment to the field of nursing. It’s a unique opportunity to showcase your individuality and suitability for a career that is as challenging as it is rewarding. 

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The College Application

How to Write the Nursing School Personal Statement: Steps, Tips, And Samples

A smiling nurse with a stethoscope around her neck. Her nursing school personal statement was accepted when she applied into a nursing program.

Introduction

A nursing career allows individuals to help patients in a nurturing environment, and to find their existential fulfillment. As a result, many learners decide to pursue a career in the field, and you are one of these individuals!

Eager to receive an acceptance letter? You know that you’ll need to submit the application material in a timely fashion, and part of that process involves crafting a stellar personal statement for nursing school.

According to a  report by CNN , many applicants are rejected from nursing schools, unfortunately. Even when you feel that you have solid writing skills, you must hone these talents and gear them specifically toward that nursing school personal statement.

After all, you are looking to boost your chances of acceptance. Following a process and learning key pointers about this essay will help you to succeed.

Preparatory Work

Don’t simply sit down at the computer and start clicking away on the keyboard. Crafting a compelling personal statement for your target nursing school involves a significant amount of preparatory work. As seasoned writers know, the art of writing is a process.

Step 1: Research the Schools

Each school is going to have its unique requirements, and you want to know what those requirements are. Researching different programs serves multiple purposes. For example, you can start to rank the programs in order of your preference. Secondly, you get to determine what schools are reach schools and which institutions are your safety schools.

This process will also help you to get a sense of how competitive your personal statement should be. The best According to a ranking of  2023 Best Colleges for Nursing in America , the University of Pennsylvania, Emory University, and Duke University are listed as the top three.

If you’re applying to one of those institutions, you should go through your personal statement with a fine-tooth comb!

Step 2: Write Freely

At some point in your educational career, you’ve likely been asked to write freely about a topic. As you start seeing the prompts from different nursing programs, feel free to type your ideas, preferably, in a word-processing program on your computer.

You could challenge yourself to address one or more of the following prompts:

  • What was your reason for choosing nursing as a career? Do you have any additional information that you would like the admissions committee to know about you that has not been previously considered in the application? (2000 characters)
  • Discuss your interest and understanding of the clinical nurse leader role.   What experiences have contributed to your interest?  (2000 characters)
  • The goal of the Doctor of Nursing Program is to prepare nurse leaders at the highest level of nursing practice to improve patient outcomes and translate research into practice.  Describe experiences that exhibit your leadership skills. (2000 characters)
  • Discuss the clinical specialty area you are interested in pursuing. What experiences have contributed to your interest? (2000 characters)
  • Discuss a population of interest in your work setting. What experiences have you had with this population? What health care needs do you see in this target group? (2000 characters)

Check out more  nursing school personal statement questions .

While the schools to which you are applying might not ask the exact questions, you have at least started to get your creativity flowing in terms of what you might write.

Step 3: Talk to an Admissions Counselor

As you’re narrowing down your choice of nursing schools, consider scheduling an appointment with an admissions counselor. Aim to schedule an on-campus appointment if possible as this gives you a real feel of the school environment. Where it is impossible to get one, as with the current Covid-19 pandemic, consider a virtual or telephone appointment.

An admissions counselor will provide you with guidance that is specific to their nursing school’s acceptable personal statement. In other words, different schools have varying expectations. While the admissions counselor may not answer all your questions, you still have a chance to receive valuable insight.

Step 4: Review Genre Conventions

Whether you applying at the undergraduate level or graduate level, you are already familiar with certain genre conventions. What you must recognize is that a personal statement can be quite different from other academic pieces that you have done. Penn State offers some great pointers on  elements that characterize a personal statement .

For example, you might think that a personal statement needs to follow a five-paragraph format with a thesis statement as the last sentence of the introduction. While some personal statements take on this format, others employ a more reflective structure.

Step 5: Thoroughly Check Requirements

You want to make sure you know exactly how many nursing school personal statements you have to write for your application and what the requirements are for each one. Take an example from medical school. When students apply to medical school, they typically have to write one larger essay followed by several shorter ones.

Knowing the expectations of the specific programs to which you are applying can help you budget your time appropriately. Pay close attention to deadlines as well. Submitting an application after the posted deadline is a sure way to seriously lower your odds of getting admitted.

The Writing Process

Once you have completed the research phase and gathered preliminary information, you may think that you’re ready to craft the final version of your essay. However, writing is an intricate process. Allowing yourself adequate time to go through this process will heighten your chances of drafting a captivating essay.

Step 1: Print or Write down the Prompt

You must adhere to the prompt. Period. Keep in mind how crucial it is to follow protocols in the field of nursing. If you cannot follow the guidelines for a nursing school personal statement, the admissions committee may doubt your abilities in the field.

Printing out the prompt or jotting it down is quite useful because you can visually assess if you have checked off all of the requirements. Pay attention to how the prompt is worded. Further, note any length requirements; you may have to write at least a certain number of words or ensure that your essay does not exceed a specified number of characters.

When essays have character limits, make sure to find out if the character limit includes or excludes spaces. As you go through the writing process, you can check off each requirement on the prompt.

Step 2: Use a Brainstorming Strategy

I am confident you have great brainstorming techniques up your sleeves. If not, The Writing Center at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill offers some very handy  brainstorming techniques  that you could use.

Try to resist the urge to skip right ahead to the full first draft. Brainstorming allows you to get your ideas out. For example, you might look at the prompt and make a list of whatever ideas comes to your mind. You don’t need to worry about organizing them or fully developing the content yet. You could also craft a formal outline as you brainstorm ideas. See which strategy works best for you.

Some writers like to use the actual writing out of sentences as a brainstorming technique. With this approach, you could just write or type whatever ideas come to mind. Setting a timer for this activity is useful. Then, you can go back in to shape your ideas.

Step 3: Craft the First Draft

Writing can be intimidating. You might feel as though you are totally committing to whatever words you put on paper. But the drafting process helps to overcome this anxiety. Sitting down to write the first draft means that you know you will make changes. As a result, you do not feel as pressured.

For some, writing is an enjoyable process; for others, just the thought alone is enough stress and a nuisance. If you fall into the latter group, budget your time. You could allocate an hour each day for a week to put together the first draft. This strategy works even when you love writing.

Step 4: Start with What You Know

Many writers become so concerned with the first sentence of their introduction that they end up losing valuable ideas for the rest of the essay. For example, imagine that you have four main ideas that you would like to explore in your nursing school personal statement. Your natural inclination might be to write about the experience that happened earliest chronologically before you tackle the others.

Consider the fact that you might feel more comfortable writing about the second or third chronological experience instead. Start with those paragraphs. You can then build the essay around them. Getting started is often the most difficult part of a writing project, so starting with what you know can help to inspire the rest of the piece.

Step 5: Prioritize Higher-Order Issues

In writing, topics such as organization, addressing the prompt, and developing ideas are often considered more important than issues like grammar and spelling. Of course, you want to present polished grammar and proper sentence structure in your nursing personal statement, but these issues are less important in your first draft.

When you are creating your first draft, pay attention to the content. Work to get the paragraphs into reasonable order, and aim to develop your ideas as much as you can. You will worry about the grammar, sentence structure, and proofreading issues when you go to revise.

Step 6: Put the Essay Aside

As mentioned earlier, planning your time is vital when it comes to the writing process. Therefore, as unorthodox as it may sound, you need to disconnect yourself from the work for quite some time before reviewing. Putting your work away for at least a day is a smart move. By doing so, you have the proper amount of time to really assess the changes that you want to make.

It’s tempting to immediately go into your paper to revise after writing the first draft, and this urge is particularly strong when the deadline is soon. You might miss important information though. Waiting allows you to recall more important details that you want to be included in the essay. Taking a break from your personal statement allows you that necessary mental space to potentially come up with fresh ideas.

Removing yourself from the project for some time also helps with editing. When you are first writing, you may include some unnecessary details about events related to nursing or your reasons for becoming a nurse. These details may be important to you, but they might not be important for your essay. Putting your work aside for some time will help you gain that perspective.

Besides, picking up on proofreading and editing errors is difficult when you have just written the paper. Your mind is likely to read the work as though it is correct because you just wrote it and you know what the text is supposed to say.

When you come back to read the text later, you are likely to catch these mistakes. For some, printing out the essay and editing it by hand seems to work great. Make sure to read the text out loud to catch errors. In other words, you may hear issues more readily than you see them.

Step 7: Visit a Writing Center

If available to you, a writing center is extremely valuable. Ben Rafoth in  Writing Spaces: Readings on Writing  explains  why writing centers are so valuable.  The main idea here is that you get the chance to review the work with a tutor. Having the insight of a professional or a peer on your work is crucial.

Writing centers function in a variety of ways. Some tutors may require students to read their papers aloud while others might make markings on the student’s paper. If you are already a student at a college, you likely have access to a writing center right on campus.

If you do not, ask a few people to read over and review your essay ( me shamelessly plugging in our services page here 🤦). Sharing your work with others might feel frightening, but keep in mind that an outside reader can offer you important insights.

Step 8: Revise and Revise Some More

One round of revisions is typically not enough for an important piece of writing. You want to make sure that your personal statement for your target nursing school is as polished as it gets. Now you will have to decide how many times is enough revision.

But as a rule of thumb, aim for at least 3 rounds of revisions. As you go through each essay each round, you will likely notice grammar and sentence-level issues that need fixing. At some point, however, you will feel confident with your paper. Then, you are ready to submit the document.

Related: 8 Best TEAS Prep Courses Today, According to Nursing Students

Topics and Approaches to Consider

In addition to allowing your writing to develop over time, you also need to make sure you are selecting appropriate content. But remember, you must always strive to address the specific prompt from your target nursing program. Consider the following clever tips to make your writing shine:

Tip 1: Start with an Anecdote

You want to grab the attention of your readers at the beginning of your nursing school personal statement. Beginning with an authentic anecdote is one way to do so. For example, you might bring in a specific experience that encouraged you to want to become a nurse or a situation that had a profound influence on your life.

Remember the importance of authenticity when taking this approach. You might feel like you need to manipulate the experience to make it sound more dramatic than it was. However, bear in mind that a commitment to honesty is imperative to your nursing goals.

As a word of caution, the admissions team has quite possibly read numerous nursing personal statements in the past, which means they can sniff out your inauthenticity from a mile away! You do not want that, now do you?

Tip 2: Talk about Yourself

Many students fall into the trap of talking about other people more than they discuss themselves. You might have a profound story about how a medical situation with one of your grandparents inspired you to become a nurse, or you might want to share details about an internship that you had with a particular nurse.

What you do not want to do is end up writing more about your grandparent or the nurse with whom you worked than you do about yourself.

While these individuals may very well have played a crucial role in your decision to pursue a nursing career, they are not the ones applying to a nursing school. You are essentially trying to sell yourself to the admissions committee. Talk about how these experiences shaped you and what you learned from the situations. Keep the focus on yourself.

Tip 3: Discuss the Target School

Chances are that you are applying to multiple nursing programs. If you are thinking of applying to only one program, casting your net wider is definitely wiser. After all, you don’t know for certain that you will gain admittance into your program of choice. When you apply to different schools, you should tailor the personal statement to each institution.

It’s quite possible that each school will ask you a similar question or that the prompts will resemble each other. While you might be compelled to do a one-size-fits-all personal statement for each of the nursing schools, that would be a sure recipe to get a rejection letter. The writing will sound as though it has been repurposed.

The admissions committee wants to see why you are a good fit for that specific school, not simply nursing schools in general. Now, of course, you can potentially use the same base. For example, you might want to share the same volunteer experiences or internship experiences with each school. However, you should have a section that is thoughtfully tailored to the individual school.

Incorporate specific details about the school that show why you want to go there. You could highlight particular classes that interest you or discuss a few of your role models who are that school’s alumni- basically, anything that, without a doubt, demonstrates that your essay is intended for the specific school.

Take a look at the following excerpt from an actual personal statement. While it is not for a nursing application, it should elaborate on the point.

“RIT is an excellent choice for me because it has successfully carved out a reputation for itself as a leading technology university. The availability of top-notch facilities, like the Simone Center for Student Innovation and RIT Venture creations Incubator, continue to set the university apart from its peers. As a result, the university sports a vibrant entrepreneurial culture that is leveraged on technology to inspire learners to identify problems that require innovative solutions. Importantly, I believe the MS TIME program will enable me to experience entrepreneurship in a reimagined way, like never before.”

Tip 4: Know What to Avoid

You already know that you should avoid manipulating personal stories and writing generic essays. You should also avoid begging for admission into the school. Further, avoid integrating clichés into your writing. Instead, look for personal ways to convey your ideas instead of simply regurgitating.

Avoid plagiarism as it can affect you professionally. Running your work through a  plagiarism checker  will weed out accidental plagiarism. When you read samples, you absolutely must not copy them.

Nursing School Personal Statement Examples

How about we examine (and comment on) some excerpts from samples of personal statements- to give you a general idea and hopefully get you started. Ready? Let’s go!

“Nursing is a very versatile field and the subjects I am currently studying have many links with adult nursing. Studying psychology has made me aware that the mental health of a patient is just as important as their physical well-being. I have learnt that the brain and the body are never in harmony, which can explain why we are such a diverse species in the way we act, or the beliefs we hold…”

– Read the rest  here

Commentary : The student does a splendid job of connecting his educational experience to the nursing field. He might want to watch for absolutes, such as the word “never.” But as long as you can back up your assertion, you are free to say what’s on your mind. The student should, however, break down this wall of text into two separate paragraphs, for readability purposes.

“After a series of illnesses and injuries during my early childhood, I was introduced to the role and care of Nurses. It was from here I became fascinated and realised this could be a satisfying future outlet for my empathetic self. I feel that nurses are truly inspirational professionals. They provide an inestimable service to society whilst working in a highly demanding and very challenging career, assisting individuals and their families through difficult times when they are at their most vulnerable. I feel I am ready to embark on this career and start to fulfill this ambition of mine to become a children’s nurse.

I believe nursing is a career in which I will excel because of my compassion for those who are at their most vulnerable. My ability to empathise with individuals would provide a positive nurse and patient relationship, putting the child and family at ease, allowing the family to approach me for support and guidance and therefore meet specific needs of the child and their family. Self-confidence is something I consider to be highly important within a nursing career. Having self-belief when working under pressure and in stressful situations is crucial when ensuring high quality care is delivered. Nursing can be a stressful career where traumatic situations are common…”

Commentary : This is an excellent example of how to start a personal statement for nursing school, and transition effortlessly from the introductory paragraph to the next. The student here clearly connects her experiences as a child to her desire to be a children’s nurse. And just from reading this sample, you feel she is well qualified for admission!

“I want to be a nurse to do something worthwhile with my career, I don’t want to waste my days working behind a computer, I want to be a nurse to utilise all of the best parts of my character…”

– Read the rest  here

Commentary : What’s useful here is that the student speaks with confidence. He seems to have a pretty clear direction from the start. However, the writing does contain comma splices, which is a grammar mistake. While the word “something” is vague, it wouldn’t be if the student elaborated on the same paragraph or the next one.

Also, the student here could better consider the audience. In this case, the audience might consist of admission committee members who work on a computer all day, and they might feel a little offended from reading the first line. Even if their personal feelings aren’t supposed to come into play when assessing the essay, the readers are likely not going into the rest of the essay brimming with enthusiasm.

In addition, the student should consider improving the opening line by focusing more on his specific goals and by eliminating information that could potentially alienate the audience.

“My motivation towards nursing did not emanate from anywhere. I relate it to the experiences that I have had since I was young. As I reflect on my life back, I remember that I grew in a family where my father and mother were nurses in the nearby hospital. I witnessed the care and love they extended to the infirm, some of who came to the hospital in dire conditions. As we lived in the staff quarters, I got a chance to sneak to my father’s office and saw how he handled the patients of different ages. I was encouraged to see him listen and take the history of every patient, something that enabled him to make an accurate treatment decision. since then, I wanted to extend the good works that I witnessed with my immediate parents…”

Commentary : This student does not have very advanced writing skills, which is why you can see her commit some grammar mistakes. For example, she ought to write “sneak into” instead of “sneak to”. However, she does a great job demonstrating how her past has led her to want to pursue a career in nursing. Do not be afraid to tell such a story on your nursing school personal statement. Just don’t dwell too much on it. And ensure the story is legit.

Writing a personal statement might seem like an overwhelming endeavor. After all, you do have to take several steps before you are ready to submit a polished essay and hopefully get accepted into your program of choice.

Keep in mind that your efforts will be worth it. Obviously, other aspects of your application come into play- Factors such as your GPA, recommendation letter, etc.

However, it is on your nursing school personal statement that you have the chance to really  craft your story how you deem fit  and showcase yourself in the best possible light. By putting the necessary time and effort into it, you could find yourself studying to become a nurse when the next semester begins.

Related Nursing Readings: 

13 Best Books for Nursing Students to Read- Reviewed

Is a Nursing Degree Worth it? Explore the Benefits

13 Best Online Nursing Programs for Non-Nurses

The 5 Absolute Best NCLEX Prep Books

Best NCLEX Prep Courses, According to Nurses

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How to write a personal statement for nursing school.

nursing college personal statement examples

Reviewed by:

Jonathan Preminger

Former Admissions Committee Member, Hofstra-Northwell School of Medicine

Reviewed: 6/19/23

Writing a personal statement for nursing school can be a daunting task, but we’re here to help! Here’s everything you need to know about writing a personal statement for nursing school.

Writing your personal statement is a nerve-wracking experience, no matter what program you’re applying for . You may be wondering: “what are nursing schools looking for in a personal statement?” or, “how can I make my personal statement for nursing school stand out?” Lucky for you, we’ve got some answers. 

Here we’ll cover everything you need to know about writing a personal statement for nursing school. We’ve included a breakdown of the components to include, examples of nursing school personal statements, and tips to improve your own. 

Let’s get started!

Students practicing to write a personal statement for nursing school

Get The Ultimate Guide on Writing an Unforgettable Personal Statement

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What Is a Nursing School Personal Statement?

When applying to nursing schools , you’ll most likely notice that most applications require a personal statement. A personal statement is a short essay, typically no longer than two pages, that tells your target schools a little bit about who you are. 

Each school has different expectations for the length and contents of your personal statement, so make sure to check the specific requirements of your target schools. Some common topics include your personal goals for nursing school and why you want to become a nurse.

Nursing School Personal Statement Format

Before writing your personal statement for nursing school, you should plan out what you want to include. If your school does not ask you to answer a specific question with your essay, here is a list of what you should include in your nursing school personal statement.

An Introduction

The introductory paragraph should focus on what brought you to this point. Your school primarily wants to get to know you as a candidate through your personal statement. Your intro should include things like:

  • How you first became interested in nursing
  • What inspires you about becoming a nurse
  • What you intend to achieve through a nursing degree

In this paragraph, your main goal is to introduce yourself and give the admissions committee a bit of background on your passion for nursing. Perhaps you have a family member who inspired you to pursue nursing, you grew up near a hospital, or you’ve struggled with health issues yourself - these are all great examples of an origin story. 

Think to yourself: “If my journey into nursing school was a movie, how would it begin?”

Body Paragraph(s)

In the body paragraph(s) of your nursing school personal statement, you can include a bit about your achievements. However, this isn’t the place to simply list your achievements. 

Think about how your experiences helped you to develop skills for nursing school . Include things like:

  • How you’ve furthered your interest in nursing through experience (both in and out of school)
  • How your achievements make you a good fit for the program
  • Specific things about the program that interests you

The body portion of your essay should contain the majority of the information you want to include. Make sure to only include accomplishments if they help to explain how you’ll contribute to the program. Your CV will list any other achievements that don’t come into play here.

A Strong Conclusion

Your personal statement should end on a positive note. Think about summarizing your statement by looking toward the future. Include things like:

  • Your future ambitions following nursing school
  • What you’ll be able to contribute to the program 

The end of your body paragraph(s) should mention what you hope to achieve in the future with your nursing degree and lead into your conclusion. The final sentences of your personal statement should further state your passion for your program and how you’ll be a great fit at your target school. 

What Not to Write in a Personal Statement for Nursing School

Before getting into our tips and examples, let’s go over what not to include in your personal statement for nursing school. Here are some common mistakes to avoid when crafting your personal statement. 

Keep it Simple

Your personal statement should be authentic and genuine, but make sure to keep the brief in mind while you’re writing. As mentioned above, a personal statement is typically no longer than two pages in length. 

You should absolutely include some personal anecdotes; in fact, we encourage it! Just make sure to stick to the relevant parts of your story and not to elaborate too much on areas that are not relevant to your application. 

Do Not Reiterate Your CV

Your personal statement is an essay, not a resume. Keep in mind that your application already contains all of your achievements on your CV, transcripts, and other application materials. 

Your personal statement is about understanding your passion and motivations. You can use examples from your CV to further assert your interest in the program, but only if you can elaborate on how they’ve specifically helped you on your journey to nursing school. 

Tips for Writing a Stellar Nursing Personal Statement

Let’s go over a few tips on how you can improve your personal statement. Using these tips can help to make your personal statement and essays for your nursing school application stand out while remaining authentic and genuine. 

Create A Timeline

When writing your personal statement, your focus should be on telling your story. Creating a clear timeline of events can help to effectively tell the story of how you decided to apply for nursing. 

Start with how you became interested in nursing, develop your story with experiences that have cultivated your knowledge, and conclude by talking about your program and your future goals. A timeline will make your essay easy to read and give the admissions committee a good idea of your journey so far.

Stick To the Brief

If your target school(s) give you a specific prompt for your personal statement, make sure to refer back to the prompt while writing your essay to ensure you’re staying on track. 

For example, if your prompt asks you a question, be sure to answer the question at the beginning, the end, and throughout your essay. Your personal statement shouldn’t be vague or veer too far off course. 

Speak From the Heart

It is crucial in your nursing personal statement to share what makes you unique . This is your chance to show the admissions committee why you’d be a perfect fit in their program and demonstrate what you bring to the table. 

Include genuine experiences that have pushed you toward nursing throughout your life. Conveying your passions and motivations is critical in your personal statement for nursing school.

Do Your Research 

One great way to make your nursing personal statement stand out is to do thorough research on your program and include it in your piece. Showing your passion for the specific program. you’re applying to can give you an edge over others and impress the admissions committee. 

When you include your research, be sure to add it organically into your writing. Use your research as a way to connect your personal experiences to the program rather than simply listing information.

Nursing School Personal Statement Examples

Here are two nursing personal statement examples that were written successfully. We’ve also included explanations of how they are good examples to help you improve your own personal statement. 

*Important note: Do not use our samples in your nursing school application. These examples are meant to serve as a guide when crafting your own original personal statement for nursing school. 

Example #1: Indeed ’s Nursing School Personal Statement Sample

“I walked backward down the hill, my arms supporting the weight of the wheelchair as its wheels rolled slowly in reverse. Sunlight danced through the trees around us and shone in my grandmother's hair as she sat inside the wheelchair. I couldn't see my grandmother's face from that angle, but I could hear her laughing with joy as she enjoyed the outdoors for the first time in weeks. My grandmother came to live with my family two years ago after breaking her hip. Although she completed much of her recovery at our home, Nurse George came by every day to perform my grandmother's personal care tasks, monitor her vital signs and assist with her physical therapy exercises. George also taught me some basic patient care practices, such as how to support a wheelchair correctly while going downhill. I had never considered a career in nursing before, but George helped me see the rewards of helping people with their medical conditions and injuries. I am excited by this opportunity to apply to Fern Hill's College of Nursing because I appreciate your program's specialization in rehabilitation nursing. Being a part of my grandmother's recovery team has inspired me to pursue a nursing career that helps patients recover from injuries or medical conditions. I believe that your school's emphasis on assisting patients in regaining their independent skills can help me achieve these professional aspirations. Since realizing that I want to become a nurse, I have become a regular volunteer at Jefferson Rehabilitation Center. I mentor young people struggling with drug addictions and provide childcare for the children of rehabilitation patients. There is no feeling comparable to when a mentee or outgoing patient offers you a sincere "thank you." I can no longer imagine pursuing a career where I do not get to help people overcome their challenges and navigate their way to recovery. My experiences helping my grandmother and patients at Jefferson have taught me the value of empathy and communication. Frequently, my mentees simply want someone to listen to them. I do my best to give them a judgment-free space in which to share their stories. Whether the medical issue is emotional or physical, patients appreciate working with flexible and considerate people. I believe I embody these qualities by actively listening and letting patients talk at their own pace. I am ready to pursue a nursing career and learn about helping patients in a more professional and technical capacity. Fern Hill's College of Nursing is the ideal place to prepare for my future nursing career.”

Why this is a good example: In this example, the writer has done an excellent job of telling the story of how they became interested in nursing. They also develop a clear timeline of events from when they first thought about nursing to how they began developing their skills through volunteering. 

Most importantly, the candidate mentions specific reasons why they’re interested in the program and how they feel they can contribute to the school and field. 

Example #2: Johns Hopkins University Nursing Personal Statement Sample

“I grew up close to a hospital, where I watched patients go through the double doors for a variety of ailments. From a young age, this drove me to develop a strong interest in the field of medicine. I knew that I wanted to pursue a career in the future that would allow me to take care of those in need. Through my courses in the natural sciences as well as social studies, I have continued to develop my knowledge in the field in order to be ready to continue my education. Now, I am ready to take the next step in my education by applying for the Nursing program at Johns Hopkins University.  Three years ago I completed a nursing shadowing internship that opened my eyes to many of the daily struggles of being a nurse. During my time in the clinic and on the wards, I had the opportunity to work In the critical care and trauma ward as well as In obstetrics and geriatrics. These various experiences showed me the diverse role that nurses play in a healthcare setting, and emphasized the importance of empathy and dedication to patient care.  Johns Hopkins University Is known worldwide for its focus on patient wellness and medical research. As a nursing student at Hopkins, I hope to not only further the institution's goal of providing exceptional patient care, but also to assist with the many clinical trials ongoing at the hospital that pave the way for new treatments. Through hands-on training with knowledgeable staff, I know that I will be able to make the most of my nursing training at Johns Hopkins and become a nursing professional that is capable of enhancing patient wellness in a healthcare setting.”

Why this is a good example: In this example, the writer develops a clear timeline and clearly defines their relevant information. The writer covers when they first became interested in nursing, courses they’ve taken, and what experiences have made them get serious about the profession. 

Finally, they include why they are specifically interested in the program at Johns Hopkins and conclude by adding what they will add to the program as a student.

FAQs: How to Write a Personal Statement for Nursing School

Here are some answers to frequently asked questions about nursing school personal statements. 

1. Do All Nursing Schools Require A Personal Statement?

Almost all nursing schools require a personal statement, which can typically be described as a short essay (2 pages or less) that explains who you are and why you want to attend the school’s nursing program.

2. Is a Personal Statement for Nursing School an Essay?

Yes, a personal statement is a short essay that briefly describes your past, present, and future experiences in relation to nursing.

3. How Long Should A Nursing Personal Statement Be?

Each nursing school has different length requirements, which can typically be found in the prompt. If no length is specified, two pages or less is recommended. 

4. What Should I Include In My Nursing School Personal Statement?

Your nursing personal statement should include:

  • Why you want to become a nurse
  • What inspires you about nursing
  • Elaborate on the experiences you’ve had that have taught you about nursing
  • Program-specific reasons for your interest in the school
  • How you intend to contribute to the program and the field of nursing

If your school’s personal statement asks a specific question, that question should be answered throughout your essay. 

5. Does Nursing Require Essays?

Yes, most nursing program applications require personal statement essays, and some require secondary (or supplemental) essays as well.

6. When Should I Write My Personal Statement for Nursing School?

You should begin writing your personal statement(s) for nursing school as soon as you receive the prompt. Make sure to give yourself an adequate amount of time to complete all sections of your application before the deadline.

7. How do you Start a Personal Statement for Nursing School?

To start a compelling nursing personal statement, there are a few different writing techniques you can use. You can start by introducing yourself, start by talking about how you became interested in nursing, or you can start “in the action” by cutting right into your story. 

Final Thoughts

Your personal statement for nursing school should be genuine, heartfelt, and express how you will make an excellent addition to your target school’s nursing program through a series of examples. 

Each personal statement you write should be adjusted to suit the individual program you are applying for. Sending a general personal statement with every application you submit is impersonal and not recommended. Make sure to follow your brief closely and map out your essay before writing it to ensure you include all of the relevant information. 

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Career Advice > Professional Development > Nursing School > Tips to Write a Personal Statement for Nursing School

Tips to Write a Personal Statement for Nursing School

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When you make the decision to pursue a nursing career, there are a lot of additional choices you need to make. Chief among them is which nursing school you wish to attend. It has to be the right fit for you in many ways. But have you ever taken a moment to consider the flip side? How do nursing schools determine which prospective students get admitted? In addition to your testing scores, a personal statement for nursing school is what an admissions committee will use to gauge whether or not you’d succeed in their program.

A nursing school personal statement is an essay that introduces you to your prospective university. It may also be referred to as a motivation letter or letter of intent. Through your writing, you share with the admissions and evaluations committee why you want to be a nurse , your motivation for choosing the school, and reasons you would be a positive addition to their program. This is an opportunity to show off your interest in nursing, display your personality, and flesh out achievements mentioned in your resume .

Understanding how to write about your background and career ambitions isn’t likely something you’ll innately know how to do. While it may be tempting to try to woo the admissions council by telling them you plan on being the best nursing student that ever walked through their doors, there’s got to be a good balance of aspirations and measured expectations in your personal statement.

Below, we describe the steps of how to write a personal statement for nursing school, provide a sample of what this motivational letter for nursing may look like, and share some useful advice to help your statement stand out from the crowd.

Nursing School Application Essay Structure

Introduction.

While other parts of your application — like your transcript and test results — share useful facts about you, your essay is what truly sets you apart. Your nursing personal statement opening lines should be gripping enough to hold your reader’s attention. Consider adding an anecdote or story about your experiences with nursing. This can help make a human connection with the committee and help them to understand your motivations for pursing the field.

This is also a great place to tie in a general overview of your reasons for becoming a nurse. Try not to get too in depth — that’s the purpose of the body paragraphs. This introductory section is normally a single paragraph.

In these paragraphs, describe your related personal experiences and give concrete reasons why you wish to attend their particular nursing program as opposed to any random nursing program. If the school provided a writing prompt for their nursing school personal statement, be sure to address their question thoroughly.

You can also give more context here. If certain life experiences impacted your grades, provide an explanation. If you have little or no volunteer experience in healthcare settings, explain what you spent your time doing. This section is typically three paragraphs, but could be longer if that’s what’s best for your essay.

What impression do you want your personal statement to leave on the admissions team? Use your creativity to bring closure and pique their curiosity. Emphasize key points made in your body paragraphs, but don’t simply restate them. Find a way to weave them in more subtly. This section is usually one paragraph.

Steps in the Writing Process

Step 1: research.

The first step is to learn about the nursing program and pinpoint the reason why they’re among your top choices. The admissions teams will likely be sifting through hundreds of personal essays, so be sure to show how their specific nursing program is a great fit for you.

Try researching awards or accolades the program has received in the past. Often, you’ll be able to find this information on the school’s website as the administration would be eager to share that kind of recognition with the public. For example, if a program was named among the best schools for men in nursing by the American Association for Men in Nursing, or if the school was recognized by the Campus Pride Index (which recognizes initiatives for LGBTQIA+ students), you might want to say why such a distinction is important to you.

If you’ve already visited the school, describing your on-campus experience in your personal statement for nursing school is like a goldmine of persuasion. It shows that you have a realistic expectation of the school and its faculty. Don’t worry if you haven’t visited yet. You can still pull a lot from indirect experience and online research.

Here are some questions to consider:

  • Have you heard positive reviews about their school?
  • What are their NCLEX pass rates ?
  • Is their location a good fit for you?
  • What do you like about their school culture?
  • Do they offer a specific program that is of interest to you?

Step 2: Brainstorm

Now it’s time to put pen to paper. Since universities take pride in the accomplishments of their students, use your personal statement to show what you bring to the table. Throw whatever comes to mind onto the page. It’s easier to build from an imperfect list of ideas than attempt to create a masterpiece from nothing. Consider the following questions to generate some ideas:

  • Which of your character qualities would make you a good nurse?
  • What personal experiences led you to choose nursing?
  • Have you spent time in healthcare settings? What was it like?
  • What achievements would you like to highlight?
  • How has your understanding of nursing grown?

Step 3: Draft

Next, pull from your brainstormed list and organize your thoughts into paragraph form. Be sure to include a clear introduction, solid body paragraphs, and a strong conclusion. Remember that you’re not going to write a perfect personal statement — nursing school doesn’t require perfection. You simply want to generate something you can mold into the essay you’ll be proud of. Here are some considerations as you get started:.

  • Are you using all of your brainstorming content or only certain ideas?
  • Why are you selecting this particular brainstorming content to include in your essay?
  • Does your first draft answer any prompts the school provided?
  • Does your draft have the makings of a compelling final essay?

Step 4: Edit

This is where you begin to refine your motivation letter. Pay attention to the big picture first, like the paragraph structure and main ideas. Double check to see if the examples you used have the desired effect.

Next, zoom in on the details. Make sure your sentences are smooth. Check for spelling and grammatical errors. Change sentences that simply don’t sound right. A personal statement for nursing school is approximately two pages, but check to see if the application provides a specific number of words. Try to stay within 50 words of the limit.

At this point, it’s a good idea to read your personal statement for nursing school out loud. You’ll catch things that flew under the radar when you read it internally. Try not to do this more than two or three times, otherwise you might get caught in a time-wasting loop of endless revisions.

  • Does your personality shine through?
  • Are your transitions smooth?
  • Does each paragraph have a unique purpose?
  • Are you clearly getting across the points you want to make?
  • Do you have a strong conclusion?

Step 5: Proofread

Next, find a trusted proofreader. No matter how thorough you are, there could still be things you don’t catch. Someone else may think of an improvement that didn’t occur to you.

Your personal statement for nursing school is a part of your ticket to your future. It’s important to make every step count. Do your best to find someone who will take this seriously and provide valuable information — a professional is ideal, like a guidance counselor or a teacher. You could also choose a peer who has a knack for writing.

It can also be helpful to ask more than one person, but try to limit outside opinions to no more than three people. If a particular comment comes up more than once, it’s probably worth revising. On the other hand, you don’t have to incorporate every single opinion. Sift through what they say to pinpoint what feels right to you.

  • Does your proofreader truly care about your success?
  • Will your proofreader return your essay in a timely manner?
  • Does your proofreader have a unique skill set that could benefit your essay?
  • Can your proofreader keep an eye out for the big picture and the small details?

Useful Tips for Your Nursing Personal Statement

Pace yourself.

If you happen to work well under pressure, great! Do what’s best for you. But generally, procrastinating won’t produce your best work. This is especially true when you consider that you’re probably drafting nursing school application essays for multiple programs.

Then, you’ll need to factor in that your proofreaders’ lives don’t revolve around your essay. You’ll need to allow time for this process. Start months in advance so that your personal statement for nursing school is one less thing to worry about during the busy college application process.

Make Your Essay Heartfelt

What’s more memorable: a dry list of facts or an engaging story that makes you feel? The latter, of course! Don’t simply restate your resume. Create a story that highlights your humanity while incorporating some of your achievements. Touch their minds — and hearts — as best you can. People are more likely to remember facts when they’re coupled with emotions . Try to create an emotional connection to cement how strongly you feel about pursuing their nursing program.

Be Strategic

You may have plenty of powerful anecdotes and successes from your resume, but you have to choose which ones will be the most impactful. How can you best display your soft skills? Which story elicits the strongest emotional response? A lot rides on your personal essay, so make every word count. These nuances will help you stand out in a nursing personal statement.

Nursing Personal Statement Example

Need more inspiration? It can be helpful to check out personal statement for nursing school examples as you plan your own essay. See below for a sample essay:

Dear Daisy University Admissions Team,

My grandmother, the matriarch of my family, is the most courageous person I’ve ever known. That is why the day she fell down a flight of stairs will forever haunt me — her agony and helplessness made her unrecognizable. It is also why her recovery is so inspiring, and that couldn’t have happened without the compassionate nurses who supported her.

From the moment we entered the emergency department to the last home health visit, nurses played a pivotal role. One of the greatest gifts you can give is to help improve someone’s quality of life. I want to be able to do that for someone else one day. I want to become a nurse because it’s truly an honorable profession. This experience is also one of the reasons why Daisy University’s nursing program is my top choice. I love your program’s emphasis on caring for the elderly population. It cemented my decision to pursue a career in nursing.

I strive to make meaningful choices. I volunteered at Sunflower Hospital for three years because that is where my grandmother was admitted. I wanted to give back to the place that had been so impactful and receive a well-rounded introduction to the healthcare system. It was eye-opening to experience the facility from the staff’s perspective. One of my main tasks was to feed patients, but as simple as that sounds, it taught me the value of emotional intelligence. Patients often confided in me, and I had to be empathetic in a professional way. Sometimes they revealed concerns or needs that I later communicated to their nurse. The little I could do meant the world to me.

I had to be mindful of the various dietary precautions to ensure the patient’s safety. I even had to send food back to the cafeteria because their meals did not match the doctor’s orders. Communicating with different departments showed me how each part comes together to care for patients. I witnessed nurses providing excellent care while under stress, serving as the central communication point for within the healthcare team, and advocating for patients’ needs. This helped me realize how much effort went into caring for my grandmother. My appreciation for their efforts, and fascination with the field, grew exponentially.

While getting my associate’s degree at Primrose Community College, I worked as a tech at Lily Hospital for one year. This role further opened my eyes to what it takes to be a successful nurse. I had to fine-tune my time management, prioritization, and be on the lookout for any signs of discomfort or issues that warranted medical attention. Previously, at Sunflower Hospital, I took it upon myself to communicate patient complaints to the healthcare team. At Lily Hospital, it was my duty to communicate these issues and any other pertinent information. I worked closely with the nurses. They depended on me to complete my tasks so they were better able to do theirs. This gave me an even deeper insight into the importance and complexity of their work.

Watching my grandmother’s healing process sparked my curiosity and desire to become a nurse, and the lessons I have learned through my work experience showed me the realities of this profession. I naturally possess many of the soft skills necessary to be a great nurse, and I’ve pursued opportunities to hone them. My tour of the Daisy University nursing program revealed that your staff has the qualities I admire most, like attentiveness, patience, and clear communication. Additionally, your focus on geriatrics is the perfect fit because that is the specialty field of nursing I want to pursue. I’m confident in my ability to succeed in your program, and throughout my career.

I appreciate your time,

Preethi Kumar

Make Your Personal Statement for Nursing School Shine

Ready, set, write! You’ve got this. Now, you’re even more prepared to create a winning nursing application essay and make it through school. Grow into the nurse you want to be in a job that’s the best fit for you. Get matched with the latest nursing job openings on IntelyCare.

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Nursing School Personal Statement: 5 Best Examples

Read our top 5 sample statements.

Nursing School Personal Statement

These outstanding nursing school personal statement examples have been approved by our admission experts who have helped countless students get into their top choice nursing programs. Whether you are at the beginning stages of a nursing career looking to apply to nursing school or wanting to further your career by becoming a nurse practitioner or a clinical nurse specialist, you will probably have to write a nursing school personal statement to gain admission to your program of choice. Your nursing school personal statement is one of the best ways to stand out in a nursing school application . In this blog, we are going to guide you in the process of crafting a strong personal statement that highlights your skills as well as the characteristics you possess that make you a good fit for the program.

>> Want us to help you get accepted? Schedule a free initial consultation here <<

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Article Contents 20 min read

Nursing school personal statement examples, nursing school personal statement sample 1.

I stood there not knowing what to do and being completely sure I had made the biggest mistake of my life. My decision to travel to a remote area of the Amazon jungle in Colombia to work as an elementary school tutor felt like the right one at first, but as soon as I got there, I regretted it. Being faced with the harsh reality of a struggling community made me feel completely out of place. It was heart breaking to witness such a palpable scarcity of resources and realize that there was not much that I could do. It took a lot of determination and adaptability to overcome the shock. Eventually, I learned to navigate this new world and embrace my role in the community. I planned lessons for the children and used all my free time to teach their parents to read and write. I developed teaching materials adapting them to my students’ context in order to make them meaningful. In the end, I realized I had become part of their lives, and I was humbled to have met such an amazing group of people. This experience taught me the true meaning of altruism and the value of hard work. This, alongside the cultural sensitivity that I developed, is what I am bringing with me to this new step in my life.

Becoming a nurse has been my goal for a long time. As a child, due to an unfortunate kitchen accident, I burned my arms with hot water and had to stay in the hospital for serval days. I remember being very scared and in pain, but there was a lady in a white uniform who would come to visit me every afternoon. I always enjoyed seeing her because she spoke to me in a way that almost seemed like she was telling me a story, and that put me at ease. One day, I asked her why she always wore white, and she said she was a nurse. ‘A nurse’, I said to myself, thinking that was exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up. She was kind and compassionate, and she knew how to explain things. Those traits that I learned from her are the same skills that I have been honing ever since, as I know they will be essential in my future profession.

I could see my breath crystalize in the air as I exhaled, dribbling and dodging the opposing players on my way to the goal. “I’m open,” shouted my teammate, poised right in front of the penalty box, waving his arms. Two more players stood between me and the goal. I hesitated, wondering if I should trust my teammate or try to score the winning point. Turning, I launched the ball into the air with a swift kick, and watched nervously as my teammate stopped it and sent it soaring above the goalie’s head. As the crowd erupted in celebratory cheers, the game time buzzer rang out across the field and I knew I had done the right thing. Every team victory that season was a personal victory, sparking a feeling of elation that I seek to replicate as a member of whichever health care team I have the privilege of joining.

My biggest soccer fan was always my grandmother, who even brought orange slices for the team to practices, claiming, “The little things are the most important!” Several winters ago, my grandmother unknowingly exposed me to nursing when she was hospitalized with pneumonia so severe that we were unsure if she would survive. Though her whole care team was dedicated, her nurse, Jackie, always went above and beyond to make sure my grandmother was comfortable and happy. Every day, Jackie would pop her head into the room and say “How’s my girl today?” or stop what she was doing to run a cool cloth over my grandmother’s feverish forehead. Each time I had to leave the hospital was gut-wrenching, but I felt better knowing that nurse Jackie treated my grandmother with such empathy. I remember being in awe of her kindness when I found out she left my grandmother sticky notes filled with encouraging messages while she was sleeping. When my grandmother asked her why she spent so much time on such little things when she had so many patients to attend to, Jackie winked and whispered, “The little things are the most important!” While I did not know I wanted to be a nurse in that moment, observing the profound impact Jackie made on my grandmother sparked a strong desire to explore the medical field.

Inspired by Jackie’s compassion for patients like my grandmother, I aimed to make the same difference when I signed up to volunteer at Riverview Hospital. With lofty goals of becoming a physician, I threw myself into my volunteering efforts, often coming in early or staying late to help stock supplies. Whenever I had a spare moment, I would chat with a patient, rearrange their pillows, or a myriad of other small things. One of the most striking aspects of my volunteering experience was how little time Riverview doctors were able to spend with their patients due to the sheer number of people to whom they had to attend. Nurses, on the other hand, had near constant interaction with longer-term patients: assisting them to the bathroom, administering medications, or changing IV fluid bags while chatting with them about how they were feeling. I was reminded of Jackie when I watched how tenderly one of the nurses changed their wincing patient’s bandages, all while trying to distract them with friendly conversation. Even aside from the comforting gestures I witnessed so frequently, it was the little things that made such a huge difference in patients’ wellbeing. Without nurses there to help execute the game play, the team would never score! Always a team-player, I knew I wanted to be a nurse.

Though my time spent on the soccer field is less and less these days, I am thrilled about the possibility of joining a new team and working hard to bring us to victory. My introduction to nursing through nurse Jackie could not have been better. Seeing the relief she brought to my grandmother in her most vulnerable state inspired me to do the same for others. Watching the nurses at Riverview Hospital expertly fulfill their duties while treating each patient as an individual cemented my desire to become a nurse who remembers that the little things are the most important. I want to be there with the assist right before the buzzer, helping my patients win, because every victory on a care team will be personal. (Word count: 719)

Nursing School Personal Statement Sample 3

“Help!” my friend Jack screamed as his faced swelled up due to an extreme allergic reaction to a candy bar he had just eaten. At the time, I did not know what to do, except to call for an ambulance. As we arrived at the hospital, I stayed by my friend’s side to offer my support. I saw the physicians and nurses swarmed around him, ready to take action. After my friend’s condition had been stabilized, he was left with the fear of another anaphylactic episode. It was his nurse that was able to calm his fears as she educated him on anaphylaxis and how to make the appropriate dietary changes. While I did not know how to respond with medical attention when my friend needed me, I gained a new purpose. I was inspired to become a nurse and to guide patients in times of uncertainty through compassion and education.  

To build my understanding of the nursing profession, I pursued experiences that would allow me to gain first-hand experience in the healthcare field. I secured a volunteer position at a children’s hospital where I was responsible for checking patients in and ensuring they were comfortable as they waited for their appointments. I was eager to practice helping calm patient nerves, just as the nurse had done for my friend Jack. Through consoling a memorable patient, named ‘Ryan,’ I learned the importance of working in a team of professionals. ‘Ryan’ was crying as he waited for his appointment since he was experiencing pain due to a broken leg. I talked to Ryan in an attempt to calm him down, but I was initially unsuccessful. To hone my approach, I asked a nurse on staff at the hospital how she approached children that are in pain. She shared with me that it is helpful to try to get their mind off the pain, for example by distracting them with an entertaining story. The next time I saw a patient crying like ‘Ryan’ had been, I was armed with funny jokes and engaging stories from my own childhood that I could share to take their mind off of the pain they were experiencing. From my time as a hospital volunteer, I learned that feedback from a team is critical to advancing professionally and providing optimal patient care. I look forward to becoming a nurse myself and working with my team of healthcare professionals to achieve this common goal. 

In my final year of university, I became involved with clinical research; as a research assistant, I approached patients in the same children’s hospital in which I had earlier been a volunteer, but now I worked to enroll patients in our research study. My purpose was to explain the goal of the study to families in the hospital, educating them on its potential impact and answering any questions they had about enrolling. This task was challenging because I was approaching families that I had not yet built a rapport with, and I needed to establish trust before asking if they wanted to enroll their child in our study. This required empathy for the hardship they were experiencing with a sick child, as well as an understanding of how to relay complex information in a way that was approachable to a variety of audiences. I learned that it is best to first ask the patient, or their family, what their understanding of a topic is to establish a baseline from which to build a conversation. In the future, as a nurse, I hope to apply what I have learned to build rapport with patients and their families for greater healthcare outcomes while ensuring that my patients are comfortable under my care. 

Since my friend Jack’s anaphylactic episode, I have taken the initiative to explore the field of nursing and to build the teamwork and communication skills needed to be a successful future nurse. I look forward to my first day of nursing school where I will be surrounded by peers that share the same vision for the future as me: to train as a nurse in order to provide outstanding care to those in distress alongside a team of dedicated professionals. (696 words)

Nursing School Personal Statement Sample 4

Nursing school personal statement sample 5.

The process of creating a strong nursing personal statement starts even before you begin writing. There is a certain amount of preparation that should take place to identify the specific information you want to include in your essay. So, make sure you take all the necessary steps before you are faced with the daunting, but fun, task of writing your first draft. Remember to give yourself between 6 to 8 weeks to write your statement. Be prepared to write several drafts as you edit and change your essay!

The Brainstorming Stage

The first step is what we call the brainstorming stage. You will need to do some soul searching and write many ideas as they come to you. Working on this step can take you anywhere between a couple of hours to a whole week. It really depends on you and how much you can actually remember from your personal history. There are two types of information that you will need to focus on at this stage: 

#1 Personal experiences

The goal behind this step is to start gathering information about your personal story and about any experiences that you have had from which you learned something valuable. The lessons you learned should relate directly to nursing or have contributed to your decision to become a nurse . You want to answer the question: “ Why do you want to be a nurse? ”

In order to do this, think about your life as a child, the characteristics of the place where you were born and raised, any meaningful experiences that may have sparked your interest in the nursing field, any contact that you had with the healthcare world, or any healthcare workers in your family that had some influence on you. Then consider your high school and teenage years and any events that may have increased your interest in becoming a nurse. How did you finalize your decision to apply to nursing school? Did you have an ‘a-ha’ moment, or was it a more gradual process? Whatever the answers to these questions may be, be sure to identify these key moments because they will be useful for addressing the thesis of your essay, which is why you decided to devote your life to a career in nursing.

Here are some examples of meaningful experiences that can potentially spark, or validate, an individual’s interest to become a nurse or what nursing means to you :

  • Being raised in a rural area with limited access to health care and wanting to do something about it in the future;
  • Growing up in an urban setting where great social disparity is evident and identifying opportunities to contribute to levelling up these differences;
  • Experiencing a personal injury or diagnosis that created opportunities to interact with nurses in a clinical setting;
  • Watching the illness of a loved one and seeing the impact that nurses have on a patient’s journey;
  • Volunteering at something related to the health sciences or an unrelated field with plenty of opportunities for helping others and interacting with them;
  • Conducting research in something related to the field;
  • Being involved in extracurricular activities that can lead to reaching a high level of compassion or maturity

Remember to always follow show, don’t tell in any personal statement you write:

#2 Nursing school research

Gather as much information as you can about the program so you can identify the specific things you like about it. It is very important to know the reason, or reasons, why you want to apply to a specific program.

In order to do this, you can look at the program’s website and pinpoint two or three specific aspects that interest you. Do you like the program’s curriculum? If so, what do you like about it? Do you like the research lab? Why do you like it? Have you done research in the past? Has this prepared you to make good use of this lab and contribute to whatever research they do here? Do you like the extracurricular initiatives the program offers? Do these align with any extracurricular activities you did in the past? Do you like the opportunities for patient interaction that the program provides? Why? Have you had patient interactions before? What did you learn from them that you can use moving forward? Knowing the specific reasons why you have chosen this program in particular is essential to write a strong essay later on.

Remember that besides telling universities what you hope to get from them, you will also need to show how you can complement their program. Showing what you can bring to the table, by referencing specific experiences you have had in these areas of interest, is the best way for programs to know that you will be successful if you are admitted. 

Look at these skills that are essential in the nursing field, and which are highly valued by nursing schools. You have probably already developed many of these throughout your life and through your experiences. Try to match these values and traits directly to your personal experiences in your essay.

As previously mentioned, the main goal of the brainstorming stage is to identify your reason for wanting to become a nurse as well as the relevant personal experiences that you can reference to support this decision. We suggest you make a list of five to seven experiences that you could potentially include in your essay. This list is going to be significantly reduced later to one or two, but it is good to have a good amount to start with.

As soon as you identify these meaningful experiences, be sure to also identify what you learned from them; that is, the skills you developed, the characteristics you refined, or any learning that resulted from going through these events in your life. Think about this carefully and select those skills that align with the ones your program of choice values. The information collected here is going to be essential later on when you start writing your essay.

Like any other academic essay, your nursing school personal statement should follow an academic structure and be organized in three major sections: introduction, body, and conclusion. See below for information on what each of these sections should include:

1. Introduction

This is your opening paragraph and, as such, it is the first impression you are going to cause on your readers; that is, the members of the admission committee. The purpose of an introduction is to act as a road map that allows the reader to understand where your story is going.

Important to remember here is the fact that an introduction can make or break your essay, so you need to come up with a very good opening sentence. This is the one that will draw the reader in and make them want to keep reading. Your opening sentence can be a quote, an anecdote, an event, or any idea that is captivating and enticing.

For example:

  • “It was three in the morning, and I was sitting in an empty room trying to think how my life had come to this.”
  • “He did not need to say anything; I knew something was wrong just by looking at him.”

Sentences such as these ones will leave the reader wanting to know more. There is a reason opening sentences are also called ‘hook’ sentences. Can you think of a good hook sentence to open your essay with? 

2. Body Paragraphs

The body of your essay is where you elaborate on the ideas introduced in your opening by providing personal examples. Remember all the brainstorming we asked you to do? This is where that information comes in handy. Your body paragraphs should include information about those meaningful experiences that you have gone through that have sparked and solidified you interest in pursuing a career in nursing.

Depending on the word limit required by your program, you will decide how many of these experiences to include. We asked you to come up with five to seven during the brainstorming stage of the writing process. Now, since our recommendation is quality over quantity, you should plan to include maximum two or three experiences and present one experience in each paragraph. Of course, one experience per paragraph is not all it takes. Besides presenting the experience, you need to include what skills or characteristics you developed because of this event and how you will be able to apply these skills moving forward in your nursing profession.

In case the program provided a specific question or prompt to be addressed, add a fourth paragraph where you answer this question. It is important to tell the program what they want to know, so do not forget to include this information as part of your body paragraphs.

Mention how your skills can be drawn upon in the future in order to give the admissions committee a glimpse of the type of nurse and professional you are going to be. Remember some of the essential skills in the nursing profession that we mentioned above and see how they connect to your past experiences. 

3. Conclusion

The same way we place great importance on the introduction of a nursing school personal statement, we also want to emphasize the big role that your concluding paragraph has on your entire text. The most important thing we can tell you is that a conclusion should not be a summary. It should, instead, be a place to emphasize some of the major ideas you previously discussed and, when possible, it should circle back to the introduction.

Conclusions have to be insightful and captivating. They should convey a sense of closure and an invitation to keep reflecting on the ideas that were presented in the essay. Think that this is the very last thing that the admissions committee will read from you. What is the last impression that you want to leave on these people? Be creative! 

Here are some more nursing school personal statement examples to help you!

Here are some other aspects about drafting your personal statement to be considered:

Besides all the information that you brainstormed from your own personal history and from the programs\u2019 websites regarding the areas that interest you, there is something else that should be part of the content of your essay, and that is the prompt. You need to be aware of the prompt of the essay provided to you by the program, and you always want to address it. Some programs will ask for a general essay describing your motivations to become a nurse, in which case the information you gathered during the brainstorming stage will suffice, while others will give you a specific question to answer, in which case one paragraph of your essay should be devoted to answering said question.  ","label":"Content","title":"Content"}]" code="tab1" template="BlogArticle">

No matter how much effort and time you put in writing your personal statement, there is a high probability that the committee members will not spend too much time reading it. Do not take this personally. They go through many application documents from many applicants like you and do not want to waste too much time reading one single essay, especially if it is not interesting enough. They want, instead, to be able to identify in a few minutes whether you are the person they are looking for.

This, of course, creates the need for applicants to write essays that have great content, great structure, and that have that ‘it’ factor that will make them stand out in a nursing school application . Your essay should be easy to read and have a great narrative. It should not read like a nursing school application resume or list every single experience you have had in chronological order. As we mentioned before, quality is better than quantity, and your nursing school personal essay should have precisely that: quality.

What experiences should end up in your body paragraphs? That is up to you. What we can suggest is that you diversify the content by highlighting experiences from different dimensions of your life. Having one of the paragraphs address a personal experience, the second address a research or academic experience, and the third address a volunteering or extracurricular activity is much better than including three experiences related to only research, for instance. Be strategic in how you showcase your skills!

Follow these steps to start drafting you essay: 

  • Remember all the information you brainstormed earlier? The first thing you need to do is identify the top three experiences from your life that you want to include. 
  • Once you have them, write them in bullet points. Create one bullet point for each that mentions what the experience is. 
  • Then, expand each bullet point into sentences and these sentences into paragraphs. 
  • As we mentioned above, each paragraph should have three essential elements: what the experience was (i.e., the meaningful experience), the main takeaways you got from it (i.e., skills you developed, characteristics you enhanced, etc.), and future applications (i.e., how you can apply this learning moving forward). 
  • Once you have your paragraphs ready to go, make sure you start each one of them with a good opening sentence. Each paragraph should follow the same structure of the general essay. This will create flow and cohesion between ideas.
  • You can look at sample medical school personal statements and think how these medical school essays could be applied to the nursing field.

Ok, so you finished writing your first draft. Good job! However, this is only the beginning. Once you are happy with your first draft, you will need to receive expert feedback on it. Having a professional like a nursing school admissions consulting service look at your essay and suggest changes to enhance what you have written is vital to create a strong product. You will see that, more often than not, these experts will be able to identify weak areas and ineffective ideas that you will not perceive.

Once someone else looks at your essay, be sure to incorporate their suggestions, work on editing and polishing up your document, and do another revision. Crafting the perfect essay that will grant you admission to your dream program is a process that should be done carefully and conscientiously. That means multiple revisions and edits are essential. In general, writing a strong competitive essay does not happen overnight. The whole process can take several weeks. So, be prepared to put in the effort and remember to do some happy writing!

The nursing school personal statement should highlight some of your most meaningful personal experiences and the skills you gained through them that will make you a great nursing professional. It should provide a good narrative that will help the admissions committee know more about you as a person and about your chance to be successful in their program. By showing that you possess certain skills that are important in the nursing profession, the committee members will see that you are a good fit.

Writing your personal essay is not an easy task and should not be taken lightly, but when you finally finish writing and look at the amazing essay you have created, you will feel satisfied with the job you did and will be able to show your program of choice why they need to have you.

No. Essays may or may not be required, depending on the program. You can check this portal and this portal to learn more.

No. There are a few steps that you wan to follow before you actually start writing. One of those is the brainstorming stage, and it will help you come up with all the ideas and information that you will need to write a good essay.

Personal information and information about the program or the areas that interest you.

Personal experiences that have been meaningful enough and that have allowed you to develop different skills that are important in the nursing field.

You need to identify the two or three areas of the program that attract you the most and see how those relate to your own experiences.

To identify the reasons that have led you to pursue a career in nursing.

It should have an academic structure and include an introduction, three or four body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Yes, it is! You need to stay within the limit in order to show that you can be concise and also follow instructions.

Then you make sure you address it. Do not leave this information out, as it is essential to provide the program with the information they want to know.

Because it is the first impression that you are going to have on your readers.

It should begin with a captivating opening sentence in the introduction. A statement, quote, or anecdote that is creative and that sparks curiosity on the reader.

You want to describe one meaningful experience per paragraph (i.e., personal example), include the main takeaways from this experience, and how this learning can be applied in the future.

You need to have an expert give you feedback on it. You may think it is already perfect, but personal essays usually require lots of revisions before they can be at the competitive stage.

It depends on the writer, but it is usually something that does not happen overnight. It usually takes several weeks. It depends on how much access you have to professionals who can provide good feedback and how much time you devote to incorporating their suggestions.

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How to Write a Nursing School Personal Statement: What to Include, Examples, and Mistakes to Avoid

RoCarpenter

So, you have decided to go to nursing school, or advance your nursing career by furthering your education. Now is the time to become familiar with the application process, get your transcripts and letters of recommendation in order and compose the, in some cases dreaded personal statement. Writing a personal statement is a common part of the application process when working to advance your education. However, the term "Personal Statement" is a bit of a misnomer. The universities and colleges asking for this essay are not looking for your life story. Instead, they want you to demonstrate what makes you uniquely qualified as a candidate for their program. In this post you will find the information necessary to make you stand out among hundreds of other applicants, create a personal statement tailored to your personal goals as well as to your potential institutions, and find out what common mistakes are made and how to avoid them.

Although some institutions will give you a specific prompt to discuss when applying to the program, many will request a general personal statement (aka a statement of purpose). There are some commonalities among all of these essays for which you will find appropriate advice here, to different degrees, depending on the program application requirements. Each of these essays should be written for the specific program you are applying to, so be wary of differences not only in essay type or topic but also appropriate formatting and length. Above all, be aware that you are writing to present yourself as a professional capable of caring for the lives of others; following their provided guidelines and avoiding familiar language (such as contractions and common word abbreviations) will allow you to present yourself in the best possible light.

General guidelines

The personal statement.

Although you want to refrain from telling the story of your life, you still want to make it personal. Be sure to illustrate with specific and unique examples why you are cut out for this career and the specific program you are applying to. There are many things that can be included in this category, not all of them will be right for each applicant to discuss or appropriate for the prompts that each individual provides. However, this list should give you an idea of what the evaluators are looking for in a strong candidate:

Educational background

  • Did you take advanced biology classes in high school? If so, you may want to highlight this background and how it demonstrates your devotion to health care.
  • Have you gone out of your way to learn relevant skills? Perhaps you can discuss your CPR certification training.
  • Have you been administering insulin to a diabetic cat for years? This demonstrates a devotion to health care and the ability to learn transferable skills. In fact, my long history of doing this has come up in highly successful interviews in the past, which was the inspiration for this particular example. Although I was medicating a different species than I would be working with, this history demonstrates the ability to regulate insulin levels, properly store medication, fill a syringe safely, and correctly administer a subcutaneous injection.

Volunteer work

  • Volunteer work at a hospital is likely a common point of discussion for aspiring nurses. e sure to tell a story about a situation that makes you stand out which solidified your certainty that this is the right field for you.
  • Assisted living facilities, caring for special needs children, working at animal shelters, or volunteering at homeless shelters (among other things) may also be sources of inspiration that allow you to highlight why you should be accepted into the program.
  • Supervisors in these types of positions may also be great resources for recommendation letters or potential proofreaders for the initial draft of your personal statement.

Work experience

  • If you have worked in a related field in a paid position, this should definitely be not only included in your essay, but considered a potential source of a particularly persuasive letter of recommendation.
  • Your employer may also be an excellent resource to ask for feedback regarding rough drafts of your personal statement.

Personal motivation

  • Do you have a unique story that has compelled you to want to pursue the field of nursing; perhaps you helped care for a family member? These personal motivations are also excellent ways to set yourself apart.

Relevant acquired skills

  • Have you acquired a particular skill set relevant to nursing outside of traditional means? This is the time to highlight that achievement. Perhaps you have experience working in a pharmacy or have proven yourself in high-stress situations; these characteristics translate well into the field of nursing.
  • Another asset that you might find to be in your favor is fluency in a foreign language, or ASL. This unique skill set might make you a valuable candidate as well as a more highly sought after employee once you graduate.

Unique traits that make you stand out

  • Thousands of applicants to nursing programs write that they have "always wanted to go into nursing", sometimes even in their opening line. Find a way to stand out.
  • For example, in my personal statement, I wrote about how I actually did not have a traditional story that culminated in my pursuit of higher education. I found my way from grill cook and karate instructor to medical research science. Embrace the fact that you may not be conventional. Letting your personality, background and voice come through in your personal statement will help the admissions committee determine if you are a great fit for their program.

Embrace the fact that you may not be conventional.

The right fit

As with any educational program, fit is important when looking into pursuing a nursing degree. Demonstrating that you have researched the program, and illustrating in your essay why it is the place for you, will set you apart from other applicants. Additionally, if your long term goal is to be an ER nurse, for example, and you are applying to a program known for a different type of nursing, application reviewers will see this in a negative light.

Essay topics

In some cases, colleges and universities will give you a specific prompt for this essay or ask for a series of short essays addressing particular questions. In these cases, be sure to answer their questions thoroughly and be aware of formatting guidelines and word count limitations. Equally important, be sure to demonstrate ways in which you are a good fit for not only the program, but also the nursing profession. This is a position that is both incredibly personal and physically demanding, but also a situation where you need to be cool under fire and fastidious with your work. Use any opportunity you can to demonstrate that you possess these characteristics in a way that makes you a highly competitive candidate and a potential star in your chosen field.

If you have applied for continued education in the past and have written this kind of essay before, you may have noticed that applying to nursing programs is a bit unique. Particularly, there is a more empathic slant to writing these essays. As personal statements go, writing one for a nursing program is much more 'personal' than preparing one for academic study. To put this all in context, below are some sample essay prompts used by nursing schools in the past. Following this, some advice from successful career nurses will lend an additional perspective from professionals directly working in the field you aspire to join.

Sample prompts

The Vanderbilt University website currently gives the following information regarding the personal statement portion of the application process:

Your Statement of Purpose should reflect your understanding of the role of the advanced practice nurse and your interest in a particular patient population. Before writing your statement of purpose, please carefully review information about the specialty on our web site so that you clearly indicate to the faculty that your career goals are a fit with the specialty. If you are applying to a dual specialty, be sure to address the scope of practice in each specialty area. Students are offered admission to their selected specialty; it is not possible to enter the program undecided about your specialty area. Vanderbilt University

As you can see, this program focuses on your understanding of what it takes to work in the nursing field and puts a particular emphasis on the patient population you want to work with and the reason behind this decision. They also focus on familiarity with the program, as discussed above. These are points that likely generalize to numerous programs and to personal statements for this field in general.

Yale University has the following requirements, according to a website which generates advice specific to nursing personal statements. This site offers the following advice, which echoes the focal points found here, and may offer further information as you pursue your continued education and refine your personal statement. As you can see, Yale differs in its requirements and constrains the length of the personal statement considerably.

Yale University nursing requires you to write a 250-word essay with free choice of your subject. In writing your essay, it is important that this provides you the advantage to stay ahead of your competition. You should be able to include intellectual development, skills, interests, potential contribution to the progress of National University nursing and among many others. It is important to note that Yale University school of nursing utilizes strict admission process so you should be able to comply with top-notch standards. Do not compromise your admission simply by sending out a poorly written personal statement. To improve your chances in Yale University school of nursing, your essay should be able to reflect your dedication, excellence, commitment, and genuine interest to belong to Yale. In your Yale University nursing personal statement, you should also be able to highlight components of your background from academic to personal that will provide the admissions committee an overview of who you are and what you can deliver. To guarantee your admission in National University Nursing, you should be able to provide your readers with information that is unique and interesting that is not shown in any part of your application. Yale University

The essay requested in this case is considerably short, however, it allows you to write about the topic of your choice. This gives you the opportunity to present yourself as a unique candidate. In this personal statement, it is still important to choose a topic that allows you to address all of their listed points of concern to the best of your ability within the constraints of the allotted space. This excerpt also stresses the focus on compliance to high standards necessary to successfully complete the nursing program. Although this is a very short essay, it is emphasized how important it is to ensure that this work is well composed. Writing a rushed essay will be obvious to those reviewing applications and reflects poorly on your ability to perform at a high level, both academically and as a potential future nurse. Additionally, it is re-emphasized in this piece that it is important to understand the program to which you are applying. As they state, it is important to demonstrate a "genuine interest in belonging to Yale"; this is true of all program applications. Always focus a portion of your essay on demonstrating why this particular program is right for you and what unique skills you bring to the table that other applicants do not. Finally, always remember not to simply reiterate information that already has been included elsewhere in your application; be sure to tell the committee something new and interesting that gives you a competitive edge.

This differs from Fairfield University's DNP program , which requires that the applicant:

  • Discuss a practice problem in your field that, in your experience, has a broad impact on patient care outcomes.
  • State professional goals for the next 5-10 years.
  • Explain how a DNP will help you reach your goals.

As you can see, depending on the institution and level of degree program that you are interested in, the requirements for application can vary greatly. In the case of the Doctor of Nursing Program offered at this university, the personal statement is more focused on the background of the applicant directly relating to their previous experience in their nursing careers. There is also a focus on the ability to think critically about the field, its shortcomings, and how they can be amended. This institution also has an interest in your long-term career development and plans for up to the next 10 years. Remember that reflecting on this in your personal statement allows you to demonstrate your potential to raise the reputation of the university in the long term, a topic that they have a demonstrated interest in learning about you as an applicant. Planning your long term career goals will also assist you in deciding which programs are the best fit for you and will allow you to gain the appropriate background to reach these goals over your career.

Planning your long term career goals will also assist you in deciding which programs are the best fit for you.

What degree program is right for you?

It is important to know that there are a variety of nursing degrees that can be applied for, even within a single university. Each of these offers a different career path, and potential for further education or future job promotion. Before you decide which program you want to attend, you should research the many options available within the nursing field. An example of the options that should be considered can be found at the University of Rochester website :

  • Accelerated Programs for Non-Nurses (BS & MS) for students with a non-nursing bachelor's degree and want to become a nurse in just 12 months.
  • RN to BS program: for students who want to earn a bachelor's degree in as little as 16 months with part-time coursework.
  • Clinical Nurse Leader (MS) for licensed registered nurses who already hold a bachelor's degree in nursing.
  • Health Care Organization Management and Leadership (MS) for all applicants with a bachelor's degree.
  • Nursing Education (MS) for nurses who aspire to teach at either a college of nursing or within a clinical setting.
  • Nurse Practitioner program (MS) for nurses who want to provide another level of care for their patients.
  • Doctor of Nursing Practice (DNP) for nurses entering at the post-baccalaureate or post-master's level.
  • PhD in Nursing & Health Practice program for all licensed health professionals who already hold a master's degree.
  • Legal Nurse Consultant Course for registered nurses or advanced practice nurses.
  • Care Manager Education program for nurses or other health professionals currently working in a care manager capacity, or entering this growing field.
  • RN First Assistant program for CNOR or APRN's.

This may not be a comprehensive list, but it gives you an idea of the level of diversity available to you. Become familiar with the programs at each institution you apply to and ensure that they will give you the appropriate foundation to achieve your long-term goals, both in your career and in potentially continuing your education further.

What do nurses say?

Discussions with successful nurses who have completed this process have revealed that, unlike personal statements for academic programs, this essay has a more personal bent. Revealing your altruism and desire to help people, as well as your motivation toward expanding your knowledge and personal growth are appropriate in these essays. You should also highlight how your increased knowledge and growth will allow you to help your patients and become a more effective practitioner. Emphasizing these things while telling an anecdotal story about volunteer work, an aid job, or other experiences will allow you the ability to express these things while demonstrating your unique skills and understanding of the field. Another point often made by individuals who have been successful in furthering their education, and therefore in writing these letters, is that it is sometimes appropriate to discuss your background disadvantages; perhaps you did not achieve top grades because you also had to work full time, for example. Communicating this to reviewers demonstrates that you can persevere in times of hardship and remained committed to your education.

Recapitulation of key points:

  • Emphasize what makes you a unique applicant.
  • Discuss why you want to be a nurse, and in what field, in a way that conveys your personality and sets you apart.
  • Remember that this is a professional document; use formal language, not contractions.
  • Do not start your personal statement essay with "I have always wanted to be a nurse." or "I have always wanted to help people." These, and similar sentiments, are common in these essays. An intriguing opening statement will get the attention of the application review committee and make you more memorable. Remember, the reviewers are reading hundreds of these a day, if not more.
  • Refrain from reiterating the information that can be found in your application. Not only is this redundant, but you will be forfeiting the opportunity to demonstrate to the review panel how you stand apart from the other applicants.
  • Research each program and write a letter that demonstrates why the program is a good fit for you.
  • Remember to showcase any skills you have developed that will make you a successful student as well as a long-term asset to the program.

These techniques will allow you to compose a more competitive personal statement for any program you choose. A well-researched and written essay will give you an edge during the application process. Make yourself stand out from the rather large crowd of applicants with a compelling introductory statement and remember to be your (professional) self. This will help to ensure that you get accepted into a program that is a good fit for you, your education, and your career goals. Apply to multiple programs at a variety of levels of competitiveness, you will not get admitted into every program you apply to, but hopefully you will get into the right one.

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Tips for Writing a Great Nursing Personal Statement

When preparing to apply to a graduate nursing program, there are many requirements and submission guidelines to remember. The component that allows you to tell your unique story — your personal statement — is one of the most important.

Writing a compelling personal statement for an MSN program, like the Nursing@Simmons online  Family Nurse Practitioner  (FNP)  or Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner programs, takes time and can be challenging for some applicants. Just as a poorly written essay can hinder your chances of acceptance, a great one can set you apart from other applicants. Below are three steps to writing a personal statement that will make a positive impression on any admissions committee.

nursing college personal statement examples

1. Plan Your Story

Very few people can sit down at a keyboard and craft the perfect personal statement without preparation. It may take several weeks of thinking about how to communicate your story, so give yourself plenty of time to plan, jot down thoughts, and make an outline as ideas come to you. Use the following tips to gather the information you’ll need to create an excellent statement.

  • Consider how your work experience as a registered nurse (RN) has influenced you and shaped your goals for the future.  How will an advanced education promote your professional growth and help you transition into the role of an FNP or PMHNP?
  • Think beyond your resume.  What traits, strengths, and accomplishments aren’t captured there? Consider your interests, including how they will contribute to your success in the program. Provide examples of nursing goals, leadership, mentorship, or growth you have accomplished or experienced. Write these down and keep them in mind as you begin your draft.
  • Choose appropriate topics for your statement.  Avoid soapbox issues, and don’t preach to your reader. This kind of statement can come across as condescending and obscure the point you’re trying to make.
  • Research the program.  Make sure you understand the school’s values and reputation. Do they align with yours? How so?

nursing college personal statement examples

2. Create Your Draft

  • When it is time to start putting your thoughts on paper, try to avoid overthinking your work.  Strive for a natural voice. Pretend you are talking to a friend and write without fear — you can edit and polish your piece to perfection in the next stage.
  • Avoid cliches and nursing generalities.  Generic descriptors, such as “caring,” “compassionate,” “people person,” and “unique,” have been so often overused that they no longer carry much weight with an admissions committee. They also don’t address your personal experience in the nursing sphere. Try not to start your story with phrases like “for as long as I can remember” or your audience may stop reading.
  • Show, don’t tell.  Strong storytelling is grounded in personal details that illustrate who you are, both as a nurse and a person. Be specific by describing how many patients you managed, how you earned promotions, or a time when your supervisor praised your professionalism and clinical abilities. Here are examples that illustrate the difference between telling and showing: 

“I perform well under pressure.”

“Although my patient arrived for a different ailment, I suspected that her symptoms were consistent with a serious infection. As a result, I was able to advocate for a care plan that prevented further damage.”

  • Use specific examples when talking about your experience with direct patient care and evidence-based practice.  Provide details about how your clinical experiences have demonstrated patient advocacy, leadership, communication, or confidence.
  • Discuss how earning a  Master of Science in Nursing  aligns with your career plans and why you want to become a FNP  or PMHNP .  Explain that you understand the commitment required and that you have the skills and dedication to become an FNP   or PMHNP. Be sure to let the admissions committee know why you are choosing their program and what makes their program stand apart from the rest. Reflect on the school and program research you did during your planning stage.

nursing college personal statement examples

3. Edit and Perfect

Even the best writers have to edit and polish their work. Reviewing and revising your personal statement ensures that the piece is clear, organized, and free of errors.

  • Once you have written your first draft, take a break and distance yourself from your work.  This will allow you to return to the draft with a clear head to review objectively and spot potential issues and errors.
  • Read your statement aloud.  Does it sound like you? Does it reflect your best qualities and the strengths you’ll bring to a nursing program?
  • Always use spell check on your essay, but be careful as it won’t catch every spelling error.
  • Use a grammar editing tool, such as  Grammarly .
  • Ask a friend, family member, or mentor to review your statement. This is a great way to catch errors or awkward phrasing that you may have missed.

Your nursing personal statement should be a window into your life. Use it to share specific experiences that have influenced your decision to advance your nursing education. Adhering to professional standards and presenting yourself in a positive, open, and honest way will help the admissions committee determine your fit and future in an FNP or PMHNP program.

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Nursing personal statements

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On this page you'll find a collection of real personal statements written by students applying to study nursing and related courses at university.

These personal statements are written by real students - don't expect them all to be perfect! But by reading through a few of these samples, you'll be able to get some ideas and inspiration for your own personal statement. 

Nursing personal statement examples

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You can find personal statement examples for other courses by using this subject list, or by returning to our personal statements by subject page.

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nursing college personal statement examples

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  • Nursing Masters Personal Statement Sample

Written by Sarah Hastings-Woodhouse

This is an example personal statement for a Masters degree application in Nursing. See our guide for advice on writing your own postgraduate personal statement .

As a qualified nurse with over three years’ professional experience, I was immediately drawn to your MSc in Advanced Nursing, as I believe it will not only enable me to enhance my own clinical practice, but also to acquire the skills necessary to improve patient care on a wider scale.

I graduated with my Bachelors in Adult Nursing in 2018, and quickly secured a role as a Practice Nurse at a GP surgery. I very much enjoyed delivering care in a community setting and developed a deep interest in the long-term management of chronic conditions.

This course’s optional module in diabetes prevention and care particularly sparked my interest – having witnessed the impact of diabetes on countless patients and their families, I would be especially eager to develop and understanding of how it can be better managed, both at level of individual practice in and in terms of wider health policy frameworks.

I believe that my willingness to meet the challenges posed by Covid-19 has demonstrated that I am well-placed to train for a more senior role in my field. Over the past two years, I have been keen to deploy my skills at the frontline of our battle against the virus. In April 2020, was among the first health professionals in my trust to staff the newly-constructed Nightingale Hospital at London’s ExCel centre, where I would later deliver vaccinations to hundreds of people in early 2021. That summer, I decided to join my local Rapid Response and Treatment Team, where I responded to urgent referrals for seriously ill care home residents and helped to create treatment plans that would prevent hospital admission.

Since 2020, then, I have demonstrated my versatility by working in primary, secondary and social care settings. I have an in-depth understanding of how various branches of the NHS interact, which I believe would be invaluable when studying Nursing at Masters level.

Working as a registered nurse throughout the coronavirus pandemic has solidified my resolve to advance in a field that showcases the best of human resilience and compassion. However, it has also made clear to me an ever-growing need for structural change within the healthcare sector. For this reason, I was particularly drawn to the opportunities within this course to develop my management and leadership skills. I believe this will equip me with the skills needed to instate positive change and improve patient care at both an organisation and regional level.

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Impactful Personal Statement Examples Nursing

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Impactful Personal Statement Examples Nursing: A Guide For Aspiring Nurses

The personal statement is a crucial component of your nursing school application. It allows you to showcase your passion for nursing, convey your unique qualities, and demonstrate why you are an ideal candidate. 

Crafting an effective nursing personal statement requires careful thought, reflection, and attention to detail.

In this blog post, we will provide a step-by-step guide on writing a compelling statement with personal statement nursing examples that will help you stand out from the competition.

Do you need professional help with writing your Nursing Personal Statement?

If you require extensive editing and need help creating the content for your nursing personal statement, order my personal statement editing service . I will use my years of experience in the healthcare admissions field to create a compelling story based on your unique experiences. I will directly edit your draft until it is perfect and ready to submit.

Table of Contents

  • Personal Statement Examples Nursing (Example 1)
  • Personal Statement Keywords for Nursing
  • Step-by-step Personal Statement Guide
  • Nursing Personal Statement (Example 2)

Nursing Personal Statement Keywords

Reading the above personal statement for nursing will highlight the themes that you must include in your statement:

Compassion                    

These are known as the 6Cs, which are a set of core values required in nursing. The NHS drew up these values and need to be met by those working in a caring environment.

Another key theme is REFLECTION

The nursing applicant focuses their personal statement around what they have learned from the experiences they have had. S/he mentioned the positive and negative aspects of the role, the challenges and how these would be overcome. Being able to manage stress and emotionally demanding situations is very important within nursing. 

Step-by-step - Nursing Personal Statement Guide

Introduction.

Your motivation & purpose.

Begin by reflecting on your personal and professional journey that led you to pursue a career in nursing.

What experiences or encounters have shaped your desire to become a nurse?

Was it a personal illness , a family member’s health struggle , or a transformative encounter with a healthcare professional ?

Identify and articulate the driving force behind your decision to pursue nursing as a profession. This will form the foundation of your personal statement and help you convey your genuine passion.

Starting your personal statement for nursing can be the most difficult part, so I recommend writing the introduction last.

Get the Full Nursing Personal Statement Guide & Template

Body of the personal statement.

Next, identify and highlight experiences that have influenced your decision to become a nurse. These can include volunteering , work experience, or even personal caregiving experiences. Discuss how these experiences have contributed to your growth, shaped your values, and reinforced your commitment to the field of nursing. Be specific and provide concrete examples to demonstrate your engagement and dedication.

Body – Paragraph 1

Work experience or shadowing

Describe the setting you were in. Who were you helping? Did you work independently or in a team?

Were you just observing? What did you see? Which skills did you see being used? How have you developed these skills and how do you hope to further enhance them?

Mention any challenges you encountered or positive aspects of the role that really appeal to you.

Volunteering/ charity work

Nursing requires a unique set of skills and qualities. Your nursing personal statement should identify the ones you possess and illustrate how they align with the demands of the nursing profession. Compassion, empathy, problem-solving , and effective communication are just a few examples of essential nursing skills. Share stories or experiences highlighting how you have demonstrated these through volunteering or a job you worked in.

Body – Paragraph 3

Extracurriculars / hobbies/ values

In today’s diverse healthcare landscape, cultural competence is highly valued in nursing. Showcasing your understanding and appreciation for cultural diversity is essential. Highlight experiences that have exposed you to diverse populations through volunteer work, community engagement, or international experiences.

Discuss how these experiences have broadened your perspective and shaped your ability to provide patient-centred care to individuals from different backgrounds. Show your understanding of the NHS values- respect for dignity, cultural differences and choices.

Body – Paragraph 4

Here you can discuss more of your experiences and/or mention your goals.

Admissions committees are interested in understanding your aspirations and future goals as a nurse. Share your vision for your nursing career and the impact you hope to make in the field. Discuss specific areas of interest, such as paediatric nursing, geriatric care, or mental health nursing, and explain why these areas resonate with you.

Your nursing personal statement should demonstrate that you have a clear direction and are committed to lifelong learning.

Summarise your top experiences and reiterate your motivation & commitment. 

Keep this short and sweet. 2 – 3 sentences is usually enough!

Nurse Personal Statement

Personal Statement Nursing Examples - 2

Shadowing at an NHS GP clinic rooted my fascination for the healthcare field. I spent many hours shadowing various members of the team, including the nurses, doctors and physician associates. Nursing sparked my interest as it combined science with compassion and problem-solving. The ability to work in a close-knit team to provide quality care to a diverse patient base solidified my enthusiasm for nursing. What really surprised me was the progression there is within nursing, from specialising to advancing your competencies in areas that interest you. I found that there would always be challenges within the role and continual changes to adapt to. This did not deter me. In fact, it heightened my motivation. There was one case that transformed my view of healthcare. It was a young man who attended and shared his concerns regarding his mental health. This hit close to home as my brother previously opened up about his negative thoughts, as he had felt lost and unable to share his emotions due to social stigmas. I felt the power that the doctor had in allowing him to open up and direct him to the relevant services, which immediately gave him hope and comfort. This compassionate care was evident throughout my time at the clinic. I additionally saw how crucial it was to have excellent written and verbal communication, as the team were constantly in touch with other services, hospitals and clinics. To develop my skillset and better prepare for nursing, I became a listening volunteer for the Samaritans. I regularly listen to the concerns of those who are suffering from a mental health crisis or require a listening ear. This requires sensitivity, empathy and active listening. I have learned a lot about communication and how to approach delicate situations, which has given me the confidence to work with patients and someday care for their mental health. Mental health nursing would be an avenue that aligns with my interest and I hope to progress my career in this direction someday. To further my experiences, I studied biology and chemistry to better understand the impact of medication, as well as learn the biological components that make up the human body. I read beyond my school syllabus and learned that medical interactions and drugs could cause side effects that vary between individuals. This tied in with what I learned about anti-depressants at the GP clinic. Learning about new medication and research taught me that a career in nursing will always require continuous learning and reading to keep up-to-date. Healthcare is constantly changing, and the recent pandemic proved that there may be new viruses that will change the way we practice. The pandemic also highlighted the role that nurses have on the frontline. A considerable commitment is required to put the patients first and have the courage to prioritise the patient’s safety. I have built my courage and mental strength while dealing with my family’s healthcare issues; as my dad suffers from sarcoidosis, I regularly see how the fatigue impacts him. Chronic pains and aches require my siblings and me to make an extra effort at home to help financially and care for him. Aside from my education and caring for my dad, I spend time carrying out my hobbies of reading and dancing. Dancing involves a lot of choreography, coordination and teamwork to be synchronised. I often teach others in the group and am open to learning new dance styles. Reading fiction helps me to zone out and de-stress. I hope to join a dance society while at university, as this will help me to keep fit and manage any stresses that nursing can bring. Volunteering, shadowing and my extracurricular research have led me to this application. It would be an honour to provide quality and compassionate care to the diverse patients within the NHS. Therefore, I plan to commit myself to learning to provide the best possible care to the patients I will someday care for.

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Personal Statement Examples: Singapore Students Admitted to Top UK and US Universities

Personal Statement Examples: Singapore Students Admitted to Top UK and US Universities

Personal statements are an essential aspect of each application. It helps demonstrate your academic interests and passion, highlight your relevant experiences, and showcase your unique identity. However, the approach is different for universities in the UK and US and knowing these differences is vital when preparing your personal statement. To guide you, we’ve included several successful personal statements and sought the expertise of Jamie Beaton , CEO of Crimson Education, to review and analyse these essays. Jamie Beaton was accepted into all 25 of the world’s top universities including Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and Cambridge. Read on to discover what makes a strong personal statement!

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How important is the personal statement?

The key thing to note with your personal statement is that it’s your chance to convey something else about yourself in your application . It’s an opportunity to sell yourself and connect with the admissions officer that is reading your essay!

If you’re applying to the UK , your personal statement should illustrate your skills and expertise in the chosen field while emphasising your passion and commitment for it . A UK personal statement is typically more academically-focused and universities are primarily interested in your academic achievements and a genuine demonstration of interest in the selected courses.

For the US , your essay should adopt a more personal and introspective angle and highlight areas like your personal growth, intellectual curiosity, and leadership development . Here, there is greater room for storytelling and creativity and it should portray a more holistic view of yourself.

Applications to both countries are made on two separate platforms: UCAS for the UK and Common Application or the university’s own platform for the US. Be sure to check out their respective websites for further information about the personal statement.

The UK personal statement

A good UK personal statement is direct and precise and it should show that the student is well prepared to study in their chosen discipline. Since the UK places a strong emphasis on your academics, try to include examples which are impactful and relevant. Your extracurricular activities, readings, and accomplishments should ideally be relevant to your chosen discipline.

With a 4,000 character limit , it’s important to strategise and remain factual and straightforward. It’s easy to lose focus in your essay as UCAS personal statements are typically open-ended with no prompts provided. As such, refrain from listing all your achievements and activities and instead dive deep into your academic journey.

Successful personal statements from students in Singapore admitted to top UK universities

Uk essay #1.

Undergoing treatment for my impacted maxillary canine tooth gave me a profound appreciation for dentistry. As I was treated by a multi-disciplinary team, I witnessed their skilfulness during each treatment stage, ultimately saving my tooth and relieving my jaw-aches. Gaining an anterior tooth in my dental arch also improved my self-esteem. The relationships I formed with each member of the team were meaningful, and I realised that as a dentist, I too, could improve patients' oral and mental health, developing similar connections.

Inspired to learn more about dentistry, I shadowed Dr. Shahul Hameed, an experienced general dentist. I observed the maintenance of a dental implant - the planning, execution and patient management. Curious to learn more about implant dentistry, I read up on the fundamentals of dental implants; principles of osseointegration and factors that influence the treatment plan, such as the load-bearing capacity of the implant compared to occlusal forces. Fascinated by dental sciences, I attended 'Discover Dentistry', a course by Sheffield University, where I learnt about current research, such as using cultured cells to assess biocompatibility of prostheses, giving me insight into the exciting future of dentistry. This spurred me to do my own research on the oral health status of the elderly living in care facilities globally. Having learnt about their poor oral health, measured using indices like the O'Leary Plaque and DMFT index, it was interesting to discover how this would greatly improve with routine care.

Another memorable experience involved Dr. Shahul extracting a wisdom tooth from a nervous patient. He explained the treatment plan concisely, making clear the possible risks before gaining her consent, in line with GDC principle 3. Upon completing the procedure, he congratulated her, demonstrating genuine care for the patient. Seeking to emulate his empathy and communication skills, I volunteered with Dementia Singapore. One event involved teaching elderly dementia patients to make lanterns using red packets. Overcoming the language barrier between us, I spoke in both English and Tamil, being understanding and displaying a flexible approach to communication. Currently being in National Service, which I will complete in 2025, I learnt how to provide first aid and CPR, improving my effective communication in emergency situations. Furthermore, I researched 'capgras syndrome,' a mental condition causing delusional misidentifications of people, for an arts competition, Destination Imagination. Acting out its symptoms made me more empathetic towards individuals with health conditions.

I also led a data analytics project, using machine learning to predict the virality of YouTube videos. This involved organising meetings and delegating tasks to my team based on their strengths, ensuring our project's progress. Such leadership skills are vital in managing a dental team. Using machine learning prompted me to consider its potential role in dentistry, in predicting the efficacy of treatments using digitally-stored patient data. I am intrigued about how this relates to patient confidentiality and how to balance patient beneficence with patient data protection. Moreover, I honed my manual dexterity skills by playing fingerstyle guitar pieces in my school's guitar ensemble. I also upload guitar covers online, garnering thousands of views. Additionally, I enjoy solving Rubik's cubes and participate in competitions. Recognising patterns during solves improved my focus - and such attention to detail is needed throughout dental procedures, to ensure successful treatments.

Dentistry is a complex field which requires technical skills and qualities like leadership and communication. Being treated by the skilled dental team has instilled in me fervour for wanting to learn more and mirror their expertise in the future.

Why this essay worked

  • Personal Experience and Inspiration: This essay immediately captures the reader's attention with a personal anecdote. The candidate's own experience with dental treatment not only sparked their interest in dentistry but also provided a deep, genuine appreciation for the field. This makes their motivation to pursue dentistry feel authentic and compelling. The detailed account of how their treatment improved their self-esteem shows a personal connection and understanding of the impact dentists can have on their patients' lives.
  • Demonstrated Commitment and Exploration: The candidate goes beyond expressing interest; they have actively pursued opportunities to learn more about dentistry. Shadowing Dr. Shahul Hameed and attending the 'Discover Dentistry' course at Sheffield University are concrete examples of their proactive approach. They’ve also engaged in self-directed research on oral health among the elderly, demonstrating intellectual curiosity and a commitment to contributing to the field. This level of initiative is precisely what we look for in candidates who will thrive in a rigorous academic environment.
  • Broad Skill Set and Reflective Insight: What stands out is the breadth of skills and experiences the candidate brings. From volunteering with dementia patients to leading a data analytics project and playing guitar, they showcase a range of abilities that are valuable in dentistry. The ability to communicate effectively, demonstrate empathy, lead a team, and possess fine motor skills are all essential qualities for a successful dentist. Moreover, the candidate reflects on how each experience has contributed to their personal growth and how these skills are relevant to their future career. This reflection shows maturity and a deep understanding of the multifaceted nature of dentistry.

UK Essay #2

Throughout my upbringing, I have seen the different cultural traditions of the US, UK, and Singapore; it has been captivating to compare the different focal points from US individualism to collectivism in Singapore. I also explored issues faced by Muslims in America while placing first in a writing competition. Societies are critical in either acting as barriers or support mechanisms, and I am intrigued by the interplay between sociology and the world we have collectively crafted.

Living in a variety of cultures, I have found it compelling to understand how we have been shaped by the cultural patterns and social principles in which we have lived. This has inspired me to explore social action theory. This was fascinating to apply to my own life as I have observed how Singaporeans have used their work ethic and collectivist values to promote 'Tiger Parenting'. Intrigued by the difference in parenting methods between Western and Asian cultures, I engaged with the scholarship of Max Weber's concept that we should interpret the lived experiences of others subjectively rather than objectively, prompting me to further explore the world around us.

I completed the 'Social Context of Mental Health' course at the University of Toronto, and gained insights into the interplay between social contexts and their impact on mental health. This has deepened my understanding of how family, infrastructure, and culture are critical to healthcare. Comparing the traditional values that impeded accessibility to healthcare in the collectivist Asian culture and the Western focus on mental health was fascinating.

Subsequently, I read 'The History of Psychiatry in India' by S. Haque Nizamie, where it can be seen that the Atharva-Veda in ancient Vedic India suggested that mental illness might be linked to divine curses, sin, and witchcraft. The establishment of mental hospitals and more humane approaches were influenced by British psychiatry during the early colonial period. I reflected on the delicate balance required to achieve an optimal societal structure that fosters an individual's mental well-being without jeopardising the rich culture that defines communities.

I am working on a research project with a Ph.D. professor to explore gender performance and what it means to 'do' gender in diverse social contexts. Gender roles are critical in shaping identities and social structures with stereotypes also impacting the experiences of social groups; often, the traditional norms and inequalities make social change seem unattainable. I have explored how gender norms are socially constructed and enforced. I applied this to the motorsport industry, which is traditionally dominated by masculine ideals. Perceived gender roles have affected the perception of female racers, thereby shaping their experiences and limiting their opportunities; in other words, there is a complex interaction between societal expectations, gender norms, and individual experiences. I hope to continue contributing to this discourse, and create positive change.

I have worked as part of the corporate communications team in Singapore's largest real estate company, where I have focused on connecting with a specific part of society by developing articles and podcasts for Gen Z. Beyond this, I was a school prefect and mentor during my A Levels, and aimed to support students academically. I am a passionate dancer having won the East England Grand Final Championships, and I was a captain of a dance team for five years.

Sociology uniquely offers insight into the root causes of issues, namely the challenge of inequality, systematic injustice, and the unravelling of social structures. I hope to pave the way for a more equitable future and challenge ingrained norms by studying this degree. To undertake challenges affecting the twenty-first century, one must have a fundamental understanding of sociology; it informs and dictates the world around us, setting the course and boundaries for change.

  • Rich Cultural Perspective and Personal Connection: This essay stands out due to the student's rich cultural experiences in the US, UK, and Singapore. The ability to draw comparisons between individualism and collectivism, along with a personal engagement in social issues like Muslim experiences in America, gives a genuine and insightful perspective. This multicultural background provides a strong foundation for studying sociology and demonstrates a deep personal connection to the subject matter.
  • Intellectual Curiosity and Academic Engagement: The student's proactive approach to learning is evident through their completion of the 'Social Context of Mental Health' course at the University of Toronto and their independent reading of 'The History of Psychiatry in India.' This shows a clear commitment to understanding complex sociological concepts and their real-world applications. Additionally, their involvement in a research project on gender performance with a Ph.D. professor highlights a high level of academic engagement and a desire to contribute to scholarly discourse.
  • Diverse Extracurricular Involvement and Leadership: The student's extracurricular activities, including working in corporate communications, being a school prefect and mentor, and excelling in dance, demonstrate a well-rounded individual with strong leadership skills. These experiences not only showcase their ability to connect with various social groups but also highlight their dedication to supporting others and fostering community. The blend of academic and extracurricular achievements paints a picture of a dynamic and motivated candidate, well-suited for a sociology degree.

UK Essay #3

When my younger brother was born with Sacrococcygeal Teratoma (SCT), I was told that he was born with a “bunny tail” on his bottom. When I saw the teratoma, the fantasy of having a half-bunny, half-human brother quickly faded, but my curiosity grew. In studying Biomedical Sciences, I hope to feed my childhood curiosity by deepening my knowledge of how the body works, and how it fails. I aspire to connect this knowledge to congenital disorders such as SCT having seen the health and self-esteem issues it can cause. This has inspired me to go further in my acquisition of knowledge and its real-world application.

Research suggests SCT arises from the incomplete migration of primordial germ cells from the yolk sac to the gonadal ridges during embryogenesis. Other sources state that SCT may be due to the failure of the Hensen’s node to regress or due to the residual totipotent stem cells from the Hensen’s node. While ultrasound, amniocentesis or chorionic villus sampling can be used to visualise and diagnose congenital disorders, it is difficult to elucidate abnormal gastrulation, for example, as it occurs very early on in pregnancy. This, along with the multifactorial nature of congenital disorders, impedes on the understanding of conditions that manifest during foetal development. It is this ambiguity that compels me to use my Biomedical education to help further the understanding of congenital disorders like SCT.

I decided to investigate the emerging research on the interplay between our microbiome and health in my Extended Essay (EE). Initially, I wanted to explore the topic of the skin microbiome using biological models. It was difficult to replicate the conditions of the human skin microbiome, but these challenges motivated me to be more creative and proactive in my experimental design. For example, I tried to measure the difference in turbidity between L. casei, B. subtilis, and a solution containing both species, to model the relationship between the commensal skin bacteria S. aureus and S. epidermidis. While this trial did not yield conclusive data, I gained valuable knowledge such as learning the aseptic technique, alongside personal growth through discovering the importance of maintaining morale and motivation through failed trials, developing my independence as a scientist. Additionally, through my EE process, I discovered a passion for research and was fascinated by Zhang et al’s study into the role L. acidophilus S-layer proteins play in the inhibition of pathogenic E. coli. Some of the techniques used by Zhang et al to explore this were gel electrophoresis and mass spectrometry, which I had learnt about in my IB biology and chemistry courses. I had previously only associated these techniques with limited applications such as DNA separation and relative atomic mass. To see their use in a sophisticated manner alongside more complex methods was inspiring. I look forward to cultivating my laboratory skills and becoming proficient in conducting research; allowing me to delve deeper into my understanding of the intricacies within the human body.

I am also passionate about fitness and enjoy applying my knowledge of muscle contraction, the cardiac system, and the muscular system to my fitness journey. In October 2023, I competed in my first endurance fitness race, Hyrox, where I was the youngest of 3500 participants. This pushed me to my limits in the best way, as sticking to a strict training plan while doing the IB was challenging, but showed me the value of consistency, hard work, and teamwork. While I appreciate the rigour of science, I also enjoy learning Spanish, playing the piano, and cooking for friends and family. I hope studying Biomedical Sciences not only fuels my interest in understanding our bodies but also enables me to contribute to its broad positive impact on human health.

  • Personal Connection and Clear Motivation: This essay excels in establishing a strong personal connection to the field of Biomedical Sciences through the story of the student’s brother born with Sacrococcygeal Teratoma (SCT). The vivid and heartfelt description of the brother's condition and its impact on the family provides a compelling narrative that clearly motivates the student’s interest in congenital disorders. This personal anecdote not only makes the essay relatable but also highlights the student's deep-rooted passion for understanding and addressing health issues.
  • Research Experience and Intellectual Curiosity: The student’s detailed account of their Extended Essay (EE) on the microbiome demonstrates a high level of intellectual curiosity and a proactive approach to research. The discussion of experimental design challenges and the use of techniques like gel electrophoresis and mass spectrometry shows a sophisticated understanding of scientific methods. The ability to connect classroom knowledge to real-world applications, despite setbacks, reflects resilience and a genuine enthusiasm for scientific inquiry. This depth of research experience and commitment to learning is highly impressive.
  • Well-Roundedness and Diverse Interests: Beyond academic pursuits, the student showcases a well-rounded personality through their passion for fitness, languages, music, and cooking. Competing in the Hyrox endurance race while managing IB studies highlights qualities such as determination, time management, and teamwork. These extracurricular activities illustrate a balanced and dynamic individual who not only excels in scientific endeavours but also values physical health, cultural engagement, and community. This diverse set of interests and skills makes the student a well-rounded candidate, poised to contribute meaningfully to the field of Biomedical Sciences and beyond.

The US personal statement

A strong US personal statement should provide a unique window into the student’s identity and personality . It helps the university understand who the student is holistically through their experiences, goals, and values. Thus, it’s important to include the experiences that reflect your core beliefs and how they have changed you. Reflecting genuinely and writing authentically is key with a US personal statement.

A 650-word limit is typically imposed on US essays, and you will be required to address a specific prompt . Additionally, most competitive universities also require the submission of supplemental essays . They are meant to support your application and give the admissions officer a deeper understanding of you. It’s important to treat the supplemental essay with the same dedication as your personal statement as they can also influence the admission decision. The word limit for the supplemental essays varies by university, typically ranging from a few words to 650 or more words .

Successful personal statements from students in Singapore admitted to top US universities

For the following essays, observe how their approach is different from a UCAS personal statement.

US Essay #1

The sickening smell of chrysanthemums mixed with incense made me nauseous. I stared at the white pearl placed precariously on my great-grandmother's lips, and tried to identify her through her embalmed face.

It was the 31st of July. I was sixteen, and this was my first time at a funeral wake.

It was in an open space, on a windy day, and I felt suffocated.

Leaving the altar, I joined a sea of faces foreign yet so familiar: distant cousins, uncles, relatives that were my age. We shared the same eyes, but I could not remember ever seeing them.

Suddenly, I was startled by joyous sounds. It was unmistakable — someone was laughing. At a funeral? That can't be right. Looking up, I saw my relatives cracking jokes while folding Joss paper. I was bewildered. How could they still laugh in grief? Curious, I joined them.

They were folding gold ingots from Joss paper, spirit currency at Chinese funerals. I, their new recruit, was handed a stack. Following the movements of my relatives, I kept pace. As we folded the Joss paper in unison, my reservations of displaying anything other than grief subsided. I sensed a tinge of sadness from everyone at the table, and realized they were joking around not because of their lack of sensitivity, but rather because of their empathy. We all shared the same grief that threatened to consume us, so why not share the burden?

We put our despondency into those sheets of paper and shaped them into gifts for offering. The jokes and laughter continued as we filled bag after bag with the paper gold ingots, and I found myself joining in their conversation, consoled by the hopeful atmosphere amidst a somber day. As per tradition, we burned the filled bags. I watched the flames of renewal eat up our hours of labor and consume along with it the worst of our sorrow. The dancing flames were laughing at death, stealing the spotlight in the ballad of goodbyes. Despite all the smoke, I could finally breathe better than before.

"Zai jian," I said with a smile when the fire finally died. In Mandarin, zai means 'again' and jian means 'meet'. When put together they express goodbye but simultaneously imply hope of future encounters. I knew that there would be more of such.

The sweet smell of chrysanthemums now reminds me of new beginnings. Just as the funeral wake brought my family closer than ever, I understood from this experience that goodbyes could also allow for new connections. I later found out that the pearl I had seen on my late great-grandmother's lips symbolizes rebirth: just as the oyster goes through a process of transformation to create the pearl, the memories we have made can grow into something beautiful and valuable. Although I did not realize this before, goodbyes were not any indication of the end, but rather a necessary prelude to metamorphosis.

  • Engaging and Vivid Narrative: This essay immediately captures attention with its vivid and sensory-rich descriptions, starting with the "sickening smell of chrysanthemums mixed with incense." The detailed portrayal of the funeral wake, from the sight of the embalmed face to the act of folding Joss paper, immerses the reader in the experience. This narrative style not only makes the essay compelling but also showcases the student’s ability to convey complex emotions and scenes effectively.
  • Cultural Insight and Personal Growth: The essay offers a deep dive into the student’s cultural heritage, providing a nuanced understanding of Chinese funeral traditions. The student’s initial confusion about laughter at a funeral and their subsequent realisation about empathy and shared grief highlight significant personal growth. This transformation from bewilderment to acceptance and understanding illustrates maturity and a capacity for introspection, which are essential traits for a college applicant.
  • Reflective and Symbolic Conclusion: The conclusion of the essay beautifully ties the entire experience together by reflecting on the symbolism of the pearl and the concept of "zai jian." This reflective insight about goodbyes being a prelude to new beginnings and metamorphosis adds depth to the narrative. The student’s ability to find hope and beauty in a traditionally sombre event demonstrates resilience and an optimistic outlook on life, making this essay both memorable and impactful.

US Essay #2

“And the award goes to...”

My eyes were glued to my computer screen, and my heart was pounding in my chest. Could we do it? Did we do it?

“Team Quasar!”

Allow me to tell you a story of the last few months of the year 2020. Those few months would launch me into the endless space of ideas and possibilities.

It was the Singapore Space Challenge 2021. Teams were required to design a lunar rover mission. It was a highly demanding competition that needed a technical understanding of engineering and space, not to mention the incredibly heavy workload of making a 50-page report and 10-minute video within a few months. Space engineering was completely new to me and my team, and the other teams were mostly university students who were experts in the field. Could we really do it? Are we even qualified for this? I was captivated by the possibilities the challenge could open up, but I second-guessed myself over and over again.

“You know what? Let’s do it.”

And so my team and I signed up for the Singapore Space Challenge 2021.

Over the course of the competition, we were stumbling on our feet. We scoured the internet for research reports and videos to learn about space engineering, from the structure of rover wheels to lunar lander modules. We couldn’t come up with anything that satisfied our high expectations for ourselves, though. So my team and I decided to take a step back. We were at a disadvantage because we knew little about engineering. We were only fifteen, after all.

But what if we turned this constraint into an opportunity? Our lack of experience in the field meant that we weren’t restricted by preconceived notions of what should and shouldn’t be. We could take lots of liberties in technicalities. We could sell a creative idea that takes inspiration from nature to demonstrate its conceptual suitability for its task of excavation. So, we went back to the drawing board. We went back and forth with all sorts of ideas until one of us said the word “worm”. Everyone went quiet but our eyes lit up.

We then came up with our award-winning idea: the lunar excavation worm.

We stopped questioning whether something would work without giving it a try, and went crazy with what our worm could do. Turning ice on the Moon to rocket fuel? Sounds fun! Making it do backflips to climb hills? Let’s do it!

The deadline was approaching, and it was time to get serious. We put our strengths of research, designing and writing together to design a full-fledged robotic worm. After 3 weeks of intense work, we submitted our entry with satisfaction, hope, and inspiration.

When the organizers announced that our team won the Women in STEM Award, I jumped from my seat and screamed. Our WhatsApp group flooded with exclamations in capital letters.

I took away so many lessons those few months. I learned that we should never give up on something because we think we’re not good enough. Instead of asking “why”, how about asking “why not”? Instead of undermining our potential by comparing ourselves to others, why not leverage our own talents to create something that is uniquely ours?

Inspired by our achievement, my team and I continued to take part in similar competitions, coming up with various project ideas from biology experiments in space to autonomous delivery systems.

But what could our ideas do if they just stayed on paper? Physically building a rover is certainly no easy feat, but by combining our knowledge and expertise we could learn in college, I believe we could really bring our beloved worm to life. I hope that by continuing to innovate and create, I will be able to make some contribution, no matter how small, to the scientific community, or to the betterment of people’s lives.

  • Engaging Storytelling and Clear Passion: This essay immediately grabs attention with the suspenseful opening about winning an award, which draws the reader into the narrative. The detailed recounting of the Singapore Space Challenge 2021 is both engaging and inspirational, showcasing the student’s journey from doubt to triumph. This storytelling approach not only makes the essay memorable but also highlights the student’s ability to overcome challenges and achieve remarkable success through perseverance and creativity.
  • Creative Problem-Solving and Teamwork: The student’s description of how their team transformed constraints into opportunities by leveraging their unique perspective is impressive. The innovative idea of the "lunar excavation worm" and the decision to draw inspiration from nature demonstrate a high level of creativity and problem-solving skills. Additionally, the essay emphasises the importance of teamwork, collaboration, and the ability to adapt and think outside the box, which are crucial skills in any field, especially in engineering and science.
  • Reflection and Future Aspirations: The reflective insights gained from the competition, such as asking "why not" instead of "why" and leveraging one’s own talents, reveal a mature and growth-oriented mindset. The student’s aspiration to bring their ideas to life and contribute to the scientific community underscores a strong sense of purpose and ambition. This forward-looking perspective, combined with a proven track record of success in challenging environments, makes the student a compelling candidate for any academic program.

US Essay #3

“Nam-myo-ho-renge-kyo”

The chant gave the funeral a more somber tone. As I said my goodbyes to my grandmother, Obaba, and looked back on her life, I took comfort in knowing that the important lessons that she taught me will continue to guide me. I remembered the same soft melodious chant reverberating around Obaba’s prayer room. Just Obaba and I in this haven of peace. I was five years old, sitting attentively on the tatami mat next to her, chanting Lotus Sutra, a Buddhist chant that extols the significance of compassion.

By eight years old, I was accustomed to rising at daybreak, walking through the mist to visit the temple and offer prayers to my ancestors. At ten, clothed in a white robe, I ascended the towering 3,783-foot expanse of Minobu Mountain with my family on a pilgrimage to experience a monk’s daily lifestyle. Obaba started this tradition in 1950; my family has upheld it ever since.

Obviously, at such a young age, I didn’t fully understand the deep significance of these religious practices: reciting morning Sutras, offering prayers, nightly expressions of gratitude to my ancestors, nor the religious talisman I wore. At times, prayers floated above my little head while I dozed off. Other times, I was simply bored. But when Obaba passed away, something changed.

After her death, I felt compelled to explore Buddhism at a deeper level to understand the source of Obaba’s boundless kindness and resilience. In her 101 years, she’d climbed the mountain annually for more than half a century, and now I felt the urge to practice Buddhism. I dove in by reading the classic texts–The Metta Sutta, The Lankavatara Sutra, and The Kalama Sutta. While I understood the meaning of the words, they didn’t reach my heart. It wasn't until I began to do the daily practice that Buddhism began to unveil its revelations.

Slowly, it dawned on me: Buddhism's essence lies in “compassion.” By immersing myself in active practice, I came to recognize Buddhism's role as a hub of social support. Its compassionate teachings played a pivotal role in helping my Obaba navigate the challenges of World War II and cultivate a lifelong spirit of empathy. Obaba was an inspiration to people from all walks of life, and they’d often seek her to pour out their problems. She’d lend a patient ear and offer advice or simply provide a comforting presence. Obaba led a life dedicated to service. She worked on cultivating her inner peace, which enabled her to assist others in their own journey towards inner tranquility. It became clear to me this was the lesson I’d been seeking all along.

Throughout the pandemic, I became increasingly aware of the struggles within the Buddhist community, where many people experienced significant economic hardship. Embracing Obaba's legacy as my guiding spirit, I initiated a video project for the Buddhist community, since in-person gatherings were restricted. Every morning, after cleaning the temple, I arranged my equipment to create relevant content for our community. These videos featured meditation sessions, insightful teachings from revered monks, and highlights of our community's events.

In the beginning, doubt gnawed at me. Would anyone be interested in online sessions? However, as heartfelt comments poured in, my anxieties dissolved, replaced by a determination to provide more for our community. It was, then, that I recognized how compassion for each of the community members is crucial in cultivating a sense of unity. Through this experience, I gleaned the profound importance of extending compassion by harnessing my own skills to uplift my community members during challenging times, including the pandemic–similar to what Obaba did during WWII.

Having said that, I am who I am today because Obaba exemplified what compassion and resilience are. As a result, I hold her as my role model, aspiring to adopt her qualities by becoming an individual who extends compassion and care to others within the community.

  • Emotional and Personal Connection: This essay immediately draws the reader in with its heartfelt reflection on the passing of the student's grandmother, Obaba. The vivid descriptions of childhood memories, such as chanting the Lotus Sutra and climbing Minobu Mountain, create a deep emotional connection. The student’s journey from not fully understanding the religious practices to finding profound meaning in them after Obaba’s death demonstrates personal growth and a strong emotional connection to their heritage and family traditions.
  • Demonstration of Compassion and Community Engagement: The student’s active engagement in the Buddhist community, especially during the pandemic, is highly commendable. Initiating a video project to support the community highlights the student’s leadership, initiative, and compassion. This act of service not only illustrates their ability to adapt to challenging circumstances but also their commitment to helping others, reflecting the teachings of Buddhism and the legacy of Obaba. The essay effectively shows how the student embodies the values of compassion and resilience learned from their grandmother.
  • Cultural Insight and Reflective Growth: The essay provides a rich cultural insight into Buddhist practices and their significance within the student’s life. The detailed account of religious rituals, texts, and the role of Buddhism as a source of social support offers a unique perspective. The student’s reflective growth, from questioning the relevance of these practices to embracing them fully, highlights a mature understanding of their cultural and spiritual identity. This reflective journey, combined with a strong sense of purpose and aspiration to follow in Obaba’s footsteps, makes the essay both inspiring and deeply personal.

US Essay #4

The piercing sound of the school bell marked the end of the day. But I found myself reluctant to exit the classroom. I didn’t want to go home.

While growing up as an only child allowed me to enjoy all the attention focused from my parents, it also meant that I was faced with high expectations. Since they have always worked hard and would often return home late, I felt that cooking dinner was my way of giving back to my family.

Cooking was not easy, and this was especially true of Chinese dishes. While I am no professional, I have improved rapidly over the years. From changing how I slice the pork belly to adapting the proportion of oyster sauce I use, I have always taken satisfaction in refining every detail to optimize the taste of my dishes so that my parents could enjoy a hearty meal after an exhausting day. Cooking was more than a chore - cooking Chinese food and eating it at the round table at the end of the day was my language to connect with my busy parents. I felt I would disappoint them if I messed up the dish.

And so, inevitably, cooking turned out to be the most stressful part of my daily routine. At the end of every school day, the sparks of knowledge acquired would quickly be extinguished by my anxious thoughts of what to cook that night. Walking towards the kitchen, I would notice my pace slowing down. I was worried that even one mistake would completely ruin the dish. And so, I was more careful in the style I tossed the fried rice and was more afraid to experiment with different spices that I infused in my Kung Pao chicken. As the screeching tires signaled the arrival of my parents, I could feel my heart drumming; in a matter of minutes, my food would be judged and critiqued. The pressure of this routine started to smother my enjoyment of cooking.

A couple of years ago, I was asked to cook for my Taoist community for the ‘Birthday of Quan Yin’ festival. I was excited to connect with my community through my cooking skills. I proudly pulled out the wok, threw in the ingredients, and focused on the tempo of sizzling, as the perfect ‘wok hay’ aroma of ‘char kuey teow’ was unleashed into the air. I poured my passion, mastery, and love for my culinary heritage into the dish and forgot about everything else. As I was distributing the food onto plastic plates, I was startled by my mother standing right behind me.

“Smells good, son,” she said. The single sentence wasn’t just any compliment - it expressed emphatic approval after years of fastidious evaluation of my dishes.

Looking back, my self-discipline and perfectionism, which my culture considers as admirable traits, had created fear and pressure in everything I did, preventing me from enjoying my passion for cooking and sharing a meal. I always thought that this was caused by the high expectations set by my parents. From my enjoyable experience of connecting people through my cooking, I realized that all along it was my own expectation of my parents’ approval that fueled me to set ever higher expectations for myself.

While I cannot deny these very expectations are what led me to accomplish things that I thought were not possible athletically or academically, I am now aware that my passion for cooking would have slowly deteriorated if I only focused on the results. And, perhaps most importantly, I consider this experience a great metaphor for other things in life: even if the noodles are too salty or otak-otak slightly overcooked, as long as I pour my passion into it, enjoy myself in the process, and share my joy with the people I love, we will be having a hearty meal.

  • Vivid and Relatable Storytelling: This essay captivates the reader with a relatable and vivid narrative. The detailed descriptions of the student’s cooking experiences, from slicing pork belly to tossing fried rice, provide a sensory-rich account that draws the reader in. The progression from cooking as a stressful obligation to a joyful and communal activity is compelling and relatable, highlighting the student's growth and introspection. The story effectively illustrates the challenges and rewards of balancing high expectations with personal enjoyment.
  • Cultural and Familial Connection: The essay beautifully intertwines the student’s cultural heritage with their family dynamics. The act of cooking Chinese dishes and sharing meals at the round table serves as a powerful metaphor for connection and communication within the family. Additionally, the mention of cooking for the Taoist community adds depth, showing the student’s engagement with their cultural and religious traditions. This connection to culture and family provides a rich backdrop to the student’s personal journey, making the essay both meaningful and authentic.
  • Reflection and Personal Growth: The student’s reflection on the pressures of high expectations and the realisation that these were largely self-imposed is profound. The shift from focusing on results to embracing the process and sharing joy with loved ones demonstrates significant personal growth and maturity. The essay conveys a valuable life lesson about finding balance and passion in one’s pursuits. This introspective quality, combined with the student's ability to articulate their thoughts and feelings, makes the essay insightful and inspiring, showcasing the student’s readiness for future challenges and growth.

US Essay #5

At 6, I really wanted to be a swan. A peculiar profession to most, this impassioned declaration was often met with baffled stares. Luckily, the reality was much more attainable: I wanted to be the White Swan from the classic Swan Lake. Gazing upwards from my booster seat at my first ballet, I grew enamoured by the unparalleled grace of the White Swan. Entranced, I pictured myself in her dainty little shoes floating across the stage. An excitement quelled in my chest–the early embers that would spark into a raging flame. No matter what, I will be the next White Swan.

Fast forward ten years and I can barely do a split! Forget backbends or leaps, I’ve yet to grasp the baseline for flexibility. It appears that as I grow older, I become less like the graceful swan I once aspired to become and more like Big Bird. I lack natural grace and elegance. My hips are stubbornly turned inwards and standing in the basic ‘fifth-position’ hurts my joints. My non-existent stamina deters me from sustaining high jumps through a routine. It seems that my only aptitude in dance is making every move look more laborious than it already is.

All around me I see friends excelling at their passions, boasting shelves of trophies and accolades. Meanwhile, I’m still struggling to attain a ‘distinction’ grade in my ballet exam. Merit grade’s not bad, but not very good either. I’ve watched my ballet classmates covet and achieve solo opportunities, while I remain shrouded in the background of ensemble dancers. I’ve watched them walk out the studio glowing with satisfaction after mastering a move, while I stay back, alone, fumbling with the exact same step.

Somehow, despite the frustration, passion would still drive me to attend every rehearsal, fraying countless ballet-slippers. I’ve gone on painfully restrictive diets all in a bid to achieve the ideal ‘ballerina’ physique. I’ve committed to demanding workout plans to build up my stamina, and dedicated myself to a consistent stretching regimen to increase flexibility. I’ve done all I could, ticked off all the prerequisites for progress, and yet I’ve plateaued in my ballet skills. I’ve trusted the process, but it seems that the process has failed me.

But here’s the thing: I still love ballet. Despite the adversities, I still find myself yearning to slip on my slippers and perform my routines. Invariably, I find myself loving dance.

Maybe it’s because the beauty of passion is the courage to continue even in the face of failure. Through this arduous journey I’ve learned that passion isn’t the brilliant spark of a raging fire, but the muted embers that glow, unwaveringly. It doesn’t matter if I fail to achieve my splits or ‘distinctions,’ because I’ve come to appreciate the gnawing ache in my legs as I leap and pirouette, and respect my ardour in continuing every dance despite mistakes and cramps. Passion isn't the extreme highs and lows of victory; it’s the persistent fight in enduring what we do, for the sake of doing what we love. I don’t enjoy the pain, nor the disappointment, but it’s these factors that are testaments to my depth of passion. Passion does not equate to greatness, but I don’t dance for greatness. I dance for the people. The lessons. The understanding of a beautiful art form.

Now when I watch ballet, I no longer envision myself as the dancer on stage. I’ve stopped dreaming of a career on stage. I no longer proudly showcase my routines to my family. But I haven’t stopped showing up, giving my all, and most importantly, enjoying it. Maybe I’ll never be a white swan, but that’s irrelevant. Because I know that I'll keep dancing for a long time to come. The truth behind doing what we love is that we never stop fighting for it, no matter the cost. Such is the beauty of passion.

  • Authenticity and Perseverance: This essay stands out for its authenticity and raw honesty. The student’s journey from a childhood dream of becoming the White Swan to facing the harsh realities of their limitations in ballet is portrayed with genuine emotion. Despite not achieving the lofty goals they set for themselves, the student’s continued dedication to ballet, even in the face of persistent challenges and setbacks, showcases an admirable level of perseverance. This genuine reflection on their experiences highlights the student’s resilience and commitment, making the essay relatable and impactful.
  • Deep Understanding of Passion: The student’s evolving understanding of what true passion entails is a central theme that adds depth to the essay. The shift from seeing passion as a path to greatness to recognizing it as the courage to persist despite failure is profound. The student articulates this realisation eloquently, showing a mature perspective on the nature of dedication and love for an art form. This nuanced understanding of passion, illustrated through personal anecdotes and reflections, provides a compelling narrative that resonates with the reader.
  • Engaging and Relatable Narrative: The essay is engaging and relatable, filled with vivid descriptions and a touch of humour. The contrast between the student’s initial dreams and the reality of their ballet skills is depicted in a way that is both poignant and endearing. The student’s self-awareness and ability to find joy in the process, rather than the outcome, offer valuable life lessons. This narrative not only captures the reader’s attention but also leaves a lasting impression of the student’s character, making it a memorable and effective personal statement.

Tips on writing effective personal statements

Now that you’ve reviewed several successful personal statements, you may have noticed some recurring themes. Here are a few tips on how to write an impactful personal statement!

1. Start early

You can’t rush a personal statement so start early! This gives you ample time to brainstorm and plan ahead. As it might be intimidating to approach a blank page and begin writing, it’s important to first plan what you intend to write . We suggest using lists and diagrams like mind maps to visualise potential key topics and how they may be connected. Outlining your personal statement before you begin writing helps keep your thoughts organised and ensures a smooth flow.

Your reader already knows the who but what about the why ? If you’re stuck on what to write about, the why is a useful starting point for your brainstorming . Reflect on your unique experiences and values and think about why you intend to study in the chosen discipline. Which experience sparked your interest?

You should also research the specific courses and universities that you are interested in before you begin writing to learn more about their requirements and expectations. Use this to carefully align your narrative with the university’s values. For UK personal statements, try to make it evident that you’ve done your research by highlighting the relevant knowledge, experiences, and qualities that you have in your essay.

2. Practice makes perfect

Crafting an outstanding personal statement requires plenty of practice! Your first draft is unlikely to be perfect so don’t be discouraged by the number of revisions you’ll need.

Start by writing freely and ignoring the word or character limit. Aim to include everything you want to cover in your final draft, and don’t worry if it’s too long as you can refine it later. Nevertheless, always keep the purpose of your personal statement in mind throughout the drafting process to stay on track. If you’re writing a UCAS personal statement, ensure that the reader can clearly understand your expertise and academic goals. For US applications, the reader should understand your unique identity and characteristics better. Keep on practising and editing until your essay's message is clear and impactful!

3. Showcase a reflective nature

Strong personal statements are authentic and reflective . However, while you may have encountered a lot of significant experiences, what happened to the student is often less important than how they processed and understood it . As such, try to reflect deeply on those key moments and ask yourself questions like “how did that event make me a better person” and “how has it changed the way I view myself or the world”. It’s okay to be vulnerable in your essay so be honest in your reflection. It’s important to highlight your journey of personal growth and self-discovery as it can demonstrate your level of maturity and emotional depth.

For UCAS essays, connecting your reflection to what you intend to study is essential . For instance, it could influence your motivation to pursue your chosen discipline or contribute to your knowledge and experience in a subject matter. Ultimately, it should prove your passion and enthusiasm for your chosen discipline.

Expand on your reflection and conclude your essay with an optimistic future outlook. Try to link your experiences and the lessons you’ve learned with your goals and how they’ve prepared you for your future academic and professional pathways. For example, you can elaborate on how your involvement in STEM research has inspired your altruistic aim to advance and benefit humanity. The key here is to highlight your journey and show how your experiences have shaped your future ambitions and actions.

4. Highlight your passion

Especially for US personal statements, letting your passion shine through in your essay is a great way for the admissions officer to understand you better . You need not mention everything you’re passionate about so select one or a few that you can integrate into your narrative. You can even use them to set the tone and foundation for your personal statement.

In the previous essays, notice how these students have cleverly capitalised on their passion to drive their narratives and demonstrate their journey of personal growth. They combine their passion with their life experiences, reflect on the challenges and growth they’ve encountered, and draw connections to meaningful lessons, making their essays memorable and insightful. In fact, highlighting how you’ve changed through your passion offers key insights into your characteristics and mindset!

5. Proofread the final draft

The spelling, grammar, and structure of your essay is crucial so be meticulous when proofreading . While content is important, your writing skills bring the best stories to life. Read your final draft aloud multiple times and see if it flows well. Watch for any awkward phrases, jarring transactions, and grammatical or spelling errors as they can undermine even the strongest essays.

Ask yourself these questions as you read your personal statement: do my ideas connect logically, is my writing engaging and succinct, and are there any segments that can be cut or expanded on? A strong essay should be cohesive with every element seamlessly woven into its narrative - nothing should feel out of place. Also, ensure that you’ve covered all the key points from your initial outline.

Seek feedback from as many people as possible as it’s useful to get external perspectives. Share a copy with a trusted friend, teacher, mentor, or family member, and ask for an impartial review. If the overall narrative isn’t clear, consider revisiting and refining it.

Identifying and overcoming common mistakes

Writing a personal statement is a challenging endeavour and many mistakes can be made during the process. Here are a few common mistakes and how you can avoid them!

1. Overlooking your audience

A common mistake students make is losing sight of their audience. Be mindful of your writing style as it varies depending on the country you’re intending to apply to . For the UCAS personal statement, students often adopt a flowery writing style to tell a story instead of being direct and factual. Remember, the aim of the UCAS personal statement is to highlight your expertise, academic goals, and vision for your time in university. Make sure that every element of your essay is aligned with these areas. 

For the US on the other hand, many students assume that difficult and emotional personal topics make the best essays. However, not all strong personal statements are about hardship. You should only write about such experiences if they are authentic and have shaped your life in some way. It’s essential to genuinely reflect on your life experiences so avoid writing about a topic just for the sake of it.

2. Being redundant

The reader can see your entire application so your personal statement shouldn’t be a reiteration of it . You have a word limit so refrain from listing your accomplishments and grades that are already on your application. It’s your opportunity to show a different aspect of yourself so try to reveal something new. While you still might want to highlight a relevant achievement, don’t just list it in your essay, explain how this experience has impacted you!

3. Coming across as arrogant

Highlighting your unique experiences and strengths is important in your essay but be mindful of your tone . Be humble, the purpose of your essay is not to show that you are the best! There’s always room for improvement so avoid suggesting that you’ve already learned everything about yourself or a subject matter. Instead, try adopting a more forward-looking approach to show how you still strive for self-improvement despite your strengths. There’s always room for improvement!

4. Honesty is the best policy

Lying or exaggerating on your personal statement is a surefire way of setting yourself up for failure . Avoid making unsupported claims or over-exaggerating your accomplishments. If you’re called for an interview, the school may ask you thoroughly about the experiences that you’ve mentioned in your essay. They can also conduct background checks on your references and claims so it’s easy to get caught out in a lie. Your interviewers are likely to be experts themselves who can verify whether your experience is authentic, exaggerated, or false.

Be honest and only write about the things you have experienced . It may be tempting to embellish your personal statement to enhance your attractiveness but no experience is too small - it’s about what you get out of it. Even if you have limited practical experience in your chosen discipline, there are other ways to demonstrate your passion and motivation. Make your enthusiasm clear in your writing by expressing your desire to pursue a career in the specific field. You can talk about how your hobbies are related, the readings you have done, and how you keep up to date with current trends!

5. Focusing too much on storytelling

Many personal statements end up looking like a recount of the student’s personal life story . While some background information provides context to the personal statement, too much of it will dilute your essay’s purpose. If you’re writing for the US, be sure to stay on track and address the prompt that you’ve chosen. A well-organised structure will ensure that your personal statement remains focused. By the end of your essay, the reader should be able to take away some of your unique qualities and experiences, and understand your motivation behind pursuing your chosen discipline.

Recommended Timeline

Making consistent progress with your personal statement is vital. It guarantees ample time to organise and include all essential points, prevent errors, and thoroughly proofread.

Ideally, you want to start brainstorming at least four to six months before the deadline . This stage is meant for you to conduct an in-depth self-assessment, writing down all the points that can contribute to a compelling narrative. Before you can start writing, it's recommended to plan your essay four months before the deadline . Use visual diagrams and figure out which of the earlier points relate to one another. Here, you need to ensure that there is an overarching theme for your essay to remain focused and cohesive. Organise your key points into sections to create a logical structure for your personal statement. Once you’re done with the planning stage, aim to start writing your first draft two to four months before the due date . Focus on capturing the essence of your essay and remember to be authentic, concise, and positive. Lastly, share a copy with your trusted connections one to two months before the deadline, and proofread and make any necessary edits at least one month before! This gives you enough time to polish your essay to perfection before the final submission.

Need support with your personal statement and other aspects of applying to US and UK universities? Our experts are here to guide you through every step of the process. Contact us today for personalised assistance!

Have questions or need help? Connect with Crimson Education for expert advice and tailored support.

Key resources & further reading.

  • 10 Great Common App Essay Examples From Accepted Students
  • How To Answer the 2024-25 Common App Essay Prompts
  • A Love Letter to My Mum: Personal Statements That Pay Tribute to Our Greatest Supporters

About the Contributor

Jamie Beaton

Jamie Beaton

Jamie Beaton is the Co-founder and CEO of Crimson Education. With degrees from Harvard, Oxford, Stanford, Yale, and Tsinghua, Jamie is an educational innovator passionate about helping students reach their academic potential. He co-founded Crimson after gaining admission to 25 of the world's top universities. Under his leadership, Crimson has become the world's most successful university admissions consultancy, helping thousands gain entry into the Ivy League and other elite institutions.

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Adult nursing personal statement example 10.

Nursing is a profession I have always looked upon with respect. I believe that the role of a nurse can be very challenging and hectic at times, as well as rewarding and fulfilling.

In my opinion a person who is willing to become a nurse needs to have very good interpersonal skills, be a good listener, empathetic, eager to learn and strive to improve themselves.

An understanding for other people's needs without prejudice is also important. I believe I possess all of the above qualities and will endeavour to maintain and improve on them whenever possible.

My genuine interest in caring for vulnerable people resulted in my study of special needs education at the Comenius University in Slovakia.

During my five years study I gained valuable knowledge of clinical and child psychology, education for people with multiple disabilities, developmental biology, sociology and philosophy.

To complement this I also studied art, music, drama and play therapy, from which I enjoyed art therapy the most. I am aware of the healing and relaxing power of art, especially drawing, as it is something that has personally worked for me as means to relax.

My course not only involved theoretical study but also valuable practical experience.

Among the places where I have volunteered are: children's home, orphanage, home for teenage mothers, old peoples home, home for mentally ill, diagnostic centre, re-educative children's home, home for blind children, therapeutic educational sanatorium, nursery and after school art club based in a primary school. I also took part in a project for homeless people.

I realised I definitely wanted to work in health care when I registered as a student with one childcare agency and was placed with a "difficult" client. He was a lovely 12 year old with cerebral palsy. He helped me to discover my caring attitude and the desire to make a difference in somebody's life.

My first professional job was in the care field. I started off this career by completing a spinal cord injury carer training which involved: anatomy and physiology of the vertebral column and spinal cord, urinary and bowel management, first aid and maintaining dignity, privacy and self-esteem.

For two and half years I have been working for a gentleman with spinal injury and for six months for a lady with motor neurone disease. During this period I feel my interpersonal skills and my ability to understand non-verbal communication cues have greatly improved. I have become a better listener too.

Earlier this year I undertook two courses at the College of North West London. I studied counselling skills and art therapy and feel I gained useful counselling skills which will not only be beneficial to nursing but also in many other areas of my life.

I learnt that the way we respond to different life circumstances can be influenced by early childhood experiences or unsolved issues. This has helped me a lot with my personal growth.

I truly enjoy working directly with people which is one of the reasons I have decided on this career path. I realise that nursing is a profession for life.

Once you become a nurse you are a nurse for the rest of your life. It will influence the way you act and think, the way you see the world around you. I feel I am ready to embark on this profession and the way of life it entails.

Profile info

This personal statement was written by ikuscha for application in 2009.

ikuscha's Comments

Hiya this is a personal statement of a foreign and mature student. I already have a master degree in special needs education. i think this statement might be a bit different but hopefully inspirational. Any feedback will be much appreciated and good luck everyone!

Related Personal Statements

This is a very serious.

Wed, 11/02/2009 - 11:05

This is a very serious statement, I think you should study to become a doctor or something like that... all the best. You've learnt a lot and you've inspired me. Thanks.

thank u very much for ur

Wed, 11/02/2009 - 17:46

thank u very much for ur positive feedback! good luck with ur application!

Wow, that was great!

Wed, 03/06/2009 - 09:15

A great example of Personal Statement! Lots of information about your experiences and ambitions without becoming ovewhelming and sounding like a resume. Good Job. Did you get in to the program already? The problem is my school only wants 2 pages double spaced and 12 pt, which roughly adds up to 43 lines. It's simply not enough to say everything you need to say.

A star statement

Sun, 20/09/2009 - 13:25

Thanks This Was indeed

Thu, 12/11/2009 - 20:16

Thanks This Was indeed Inspirational.. Different But Did Help.. Thanks

Not perfect, but a good effort.

Sun, 26/09/2010 - 22:40

It's not bad, but I think you need less of the 'idealistic' waffle.. ("Ready for the way of life it entails", etc) it sounds a little martyr-ish. My personal statement sounded a bit like that and although I qualify in six months, (so proud!) and got on the course with no problems, I think its better to write showing you have researched - not just the 'I want to care for people' blah that everyone writes. Do some research, biology, talk about clinical proceedures, and indicate specialities you might be interested in. It makes it more original. Good luck.

this iss sooo goood its 100x

Mon, 07/10/2013 - 16:16

this iss sooo goood its 100x way better than mynn i dont think i cud do such a gud ps.

Add new comment

COMMENTS

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  10. Nursing Personal Statement Writing Guide (With Examples)

    So, the following format is suitable for writing your personal statement. Paragraph 1 - Explain in this section a reason or story as to why you want to be a nurse. This will help to create a connection. Paragraph 2 - At this point, you can explore your work experience as well as your education.

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