How to Overcome Social Anxiety: 8 Techniques & Exercises
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I’ve tried going before, but at the door I blushed and started sweating. I just knew everyone would stare at me, judge me, and laugh at me.
I’ll just sit this one out too, pretend to be sick or something.
If this sounds like your typical diary entry, then you might struggle with some form of social anxiety.
In this article, we outline ways to cope with mild social anxiety and provide helpful tips, tricks, and exercises to help you prepare for upcoming social occasions. Before we begin, it’s important to note that social anxiety differs from social anxiety disorder, which is a clinical disorder. These two can be confused with each other because they are closely related, but this post focuses on mild social anxiety only.
Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Stress & Burnout Prevention Exercises (PDF) for free . These science-based exercises will equip you and your clients with tools to better manage stress and find a healthier balance in your life.
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This Article Contains
- The Difference Between Social Anxiety & Social Anxiety Disorder
Symptoms of Social Anxiety
Social anxiety in the workplace, social anxiety and public speaking, can you overcome social anxiety 3 techniques, self-help exercises for managing social anxiety, 3 books about social anxiety, helpful resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message, frequently asked questions, the difference between social anxiety & social anxiety disorder.
Most of us experience moments of shyness, tension, nervousness, or anxiety around social events. Sometimes it can be as simple as butterflies in the stomach when expecting to meet new people at a party.
Physical reactions such as these signal that the situation is important enough to want to make a good impression. When our bodies are activated in this way, we are often galvanized into action (Weissman & Mendes, 2021).
However, the mild nervousness and shyness of social anxiety every now and again must not be confused with social anxiety disorder .
Social anxiety disorder , sometimes referred to as social phobia, is a type of clinical anxiety disorder whereby an individual’s persistent fear of being watched or judged by others impedes everyday functioning.
Individuals with this disorder may ruminate on planned social events weeks in advance and may actively avoid social situations completely. The disorder can be so intrusive and cause such distress to individuals that even simple tasks, such as buying groceries or visiting family, are impossible to do (Stein & Stein, 2008).
To be diagnosed with social anxiety disorder by a qualified mental health professional, individuals may experience several criteria as outlined by the Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (American Psychiatric Association, 2013).
Criteria include:
- A persistent fear of social situations in which the individual fears being exposed to the scrutiny of others, or the fear of acting in a way that will be embarrassing or humiliating
- Avoiding social situations or enduring them with intense fear or anxiety
- The fear or anxiety is not proportional to the actual threat posed by the social situation.
- The fear or anxiety is so intense that it affects normal functioning.
- Lasting for six months or more
- The fear, anxiety, or avoidance is not because of a medical condition, substance use, or other mental disorder.
In these instances, the help of a therapist is needed. Let’s look at the symptoms of social anxiety to clarify where the line should be drawn.
![Social Anxiety Symptoms Symptoms of Social Anxiety](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/Symptoms-of-Anxiety-300x150.jpg)
These are fairly generic symptoms that occur when the autonomic nervous system (ANS; our fight-or-flight system ) becomes activated (Cannon, 1932), and the body is flooded with epinephrine (adrenaline).
Couple this with a decrease in gamma-aminobutyric acid (a main inhibitory neurotransmitter), which for most individuals is turned down during social situations, and you may feel tense and anxious. This activation happens when an event or situation is seen as stressful, whether the perception is accurate or not.
While chronic stress is extremely detrimental to the body — because of the continuous activation of the ANS (McEwen & Stellar, 1993) — mild stress can actually be helpful in enhancing performance (Kofman et al., 2006) and spurring action.
Usually when this happens, the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) activates in order to counter the activation of the ANS, by releasing hormones that downregulate the mind and body and help us relax (Sapolsky, 2004).
So when tackling mild social anxiety, the key is to activate the PNS. Below, we will outline useful techniques to activate the parasympathetic nervous system.
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Given that we can all feel the effects of social anxiety at one time or another, how can we actively tackle such feelings? And how do we cope in stressful environments, such as work?
Coping with social anxiety at work
When those familiar feelings of anxiety emerge at work, individuals face a tough decision: to struggle ahead in silence or take a timeout. Ideally, this is the ability to step away and take a few minutes to apply grounding techniques, as an example. More on that below.
It is strongly recommended that all organizations and employers build supportive cultures where individuals feel able to take such a break. While discussions of mental health in the workplace are fortunately now more commonplace, there is still some way to go to normalize the pervasiveness of anxiety in the human experience.
Strategies for reducing workplace anxiety
To calm anxious feelings at work, individuals can tap into several key techniques that should help to turn things around quickly.
The primary aim here is to activate the PNS. When feeling anxious, it is hard to feel grounded. The mind is spiraling with unhelpful thoughts.
Grounding techniques work by helping the mind focus on the body and the present moment. This can help you feel calmer and more centered.
Below are three highly effective types of grounding techniques.
Breathing techniques
The breath is miraculous! By simply concentrating on breathing, the nervous system can be actively downregulated, and within no time at all, anxious moments may dissipate.
One example is to breathe in for four seconds, hold the breath for four seconds, and breathe out slowly over a count of eight seconds. There are many variations of this breathing technique, but essentially, breathing out for longer than breathing in helps slow a racing heart.
Touching the body can be an excellent way to soothe and calm the nervous system, particularly areas that are not associated with anxiety. This includes rubbing your earlobes or elbows, which cannot themselves hold tension or anxiety in them.
Touch is powerful; it is often used in therapeutic settings for the very purpose of relieving anxiety and has also been effective in reducing pain.
When feeling anxious, individuals should try to distract the mind from worrying. An alternative and equally effective technique to breathing exercises is to focus on counting.
Counting can be particularly powerful when paired with observation of the surroundings. A popular example is to find five things that can be seen, four things that can be felt, three things that can be heard, two things that can be smelled, and one thing that can be tasted.
When doing this exercise, try to be as specific as possible and provide lots of detail with what is sensed.
![Fear of public speaking Performance Anxiety](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/Performance-Anxiety-300x150.jpeg)
It’s so intimidating in fact, that researchers often use the notion of having to speak in public to induce individuals into stressful states during experiments (see Kirschbaum et al., 1993).
Indeed, public speaking is the ultimate trigger for social anxiety because it involves purposefully exposing oneself to the opinions and judgments of others.
Overcoming public speaking anxiety
To prepare for an upcoming speech, public-speaking anxiety can be overcome similarly as other stressful events: by focusing on strategies to calm the nervous system.
Tips and strategies for delivering a confident speech
1. prepare well.
Practice, practice, practice! This might be an obvious tip, but by rehearsing the speech more confidence is built about delivering the speech.
This confidence can help offset some of the nervousness experienced.
2. Manage breathing
Engage in breathing exercises before delivering the speech. As mentioned earlier, slowing down breathing is a simple yet powerful way to downregulate the body.
When feeling those familiar anxiety symptoms before giving a speech, practice slow, deep breaths. Pair this with any of the aforementioned grounding or relaxation techniques to amplify the benefits and bring you back into the present moment.
3. Burn energy
Harness some of that nervous energy and take action. Do star jumps or jumping jacks before the speech to blow off steam. During the speech, individuals can move around and gesture to consume even more nervous energy.
4. Visualize success
Before the event, spend a few minutes visualizing the delivery of a successful speech or presentation. Imagine the audience responding positively and see yourself feeling calm and collected.
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If you recognize yourself as someone who often experiences social anxiety and are wondering what other steps you can take to reduce the frequency and/or intensity of these experiences, the key resides in being proactive .
If we simply do nothing and then try desperately to reduce anxiety when it rears its head in a stressful moment, we may very well be ill prepared to manage it effectively.
Given that it is not possible to avoid stressful events, the focus should be to learn how to better cope with them. By building internal resources , a stressful event can be navigated with ease.
Below are three preventive practices that will help build all-important psychological resources, such as resilience, positive coping, positive emotions, and self-esteem.
Physical exercise
The benefits of regular exercise to both physical and mental health are well documented (Penedo & Dahn, 2005).
By acting as a protective buffer against disease and psychological distress, exercise is one surefire way to bolster internal resources. Exercise boosts the experience of positive emotions, which in turn helps accrue psychological resources (see the broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions ; Fredrickson, 2001).
Mindfulness practice
Mindfulness is another superpower that can help stock up internal resources. If engaging in a regular practice, users can expect a cascade of positive outcomes, including reduced depressive and anxious symptoms and increased positive mood, compassion, and resilience (Gu et al., 2015).
Even 10 minutes a day of mindfulness practice can drastically improve both physical and psychological functioning.
The beauty of mindfulness is that it does not have to be practiced as a formal meditation. Rather, it can take many forms, including mindfulness walking or listening to music.
Experiment with different mindfulness activities to find the best-suited format for you or your clients.
Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy
Sometimes, in order to counteract anxiety, you might want to look more closely at patterns of thinking. Given that activation of the autonomic nervous system and symptoms of anxiety occur because we interpret an event as stressful, it stands to reason that interpretations may not always be on point.
When this happens, engaging with Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be a real game changer. CBT is often employed as a treatment for anxiety and works by challenging thinking patterns and helping individuals shift their mindsets.
Useful CBT techniques include writing down thoughts and then gently challenging the veracity of them, and learning positive coping mechanisms such as cognitive reframing.
![Self-help exercises Observe anxiety mindfully](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/Observe-anxiety-mindfully-300x150.jpeg)
Observing Anxiety Mindfully
This worksheet helps clients identify and observe how anxiety feels in the body.
Clients are encouraged to explore the different sensations that arise in the body when thinking about a stressful social situation.
Once the sensations have been observed, clients are encouraged to accept and sit with the feelings and sensations of anxiety from a place of nonjudgment, as with any mindfulness practice.
Lastly, clients are invited to use visualization to further tap into self-compassion and recognize the transient nature of anxiety.
Anxiety Record
The Anxiety Record is an effective worksheet that allows a client to capture step by step what happens when they experience anxiety.
The first step is to identify the stressor, before noting down anxious feelings and whether thoughts are helpful or realistic.
The client is then invited to identify more helpful thoughts when facing anxious moments and ways to regain a sense of control when feeling carried away with anxious thoughts.
Creating a Mindfulness Anxiety Plan
One excellent way to prepare for upcoming social situations is to create a mindfulness anxiety plan .
Mindfulness has a powerful impact on building coping skills, and it also enhances the ability to sit with discomfort without getting swept away by feelings.
If you are interested in learning more about social anxiety, the following three books provide excellent reading. These three were chosen because of their practical nature and the fact that they are grounded in science.
1. How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiet y – Ellen Hendriksen
![How To Be Yourself How To Be Yourself](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/How-To-Be-Yourself-196x300.jpg)
Dr. Hendriksen is a clinical psychologist specializing in overcoming anxiety so that individuals may lead a more authentic life.
How to Be Yourself takes real-life stories of situations where individuals have experienced social anxiety and weaves in a compelling narrative that outlines why social anxiety persists and the science behind it.
The book offers tangible, practical ways to rewire our brain so we can break free of the shackles of social anxiety.
Find the book on Amazon .
2. Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness: A Self-Help Guide Using Cognitive Behavioural Techniques – Gillian Butler
![Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/Overcoming-Social-Anxiety-and-Shyness-191x300.jpg)
If you are looking for a self-help guide that takes individuals through the techniques of CBT as a pathway to reduce social anxiety, this book by Dr. Gillian Butler, a cognitive therapist and clinical psychologist, is for you.
Chock-full of practical strategies, the reader can work through the book at their own pace and by the end should feel armed to the teeth with solutions for fending off social anxiety.
3. Find Your Voice: The Secret to Talking With Confidence in Any Situation – Caroline Goyder
![Find Your Voice Find Your Voice](https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/Find-Your-Voice-205x300.jpg)
Caroline Goyder is a renowned voice coach and author of another highly popular book, Gravitas .
The central thesis of Find Your Voice is learning to speak with confidence by implementing different strategies that help individuals relax, stand tall, and speak with clarity.
This is a must-read for anyone who wants to speak confidently in any type of social situation.
For more information on Goyder’s work, check out this popular TEDx Talk.
PositivePsychology.com has a plethora of useful resources for anyone interested in learning more about coping with social anxiety.
Below, you will find several worksheets for learning to cope with anxiety. Completing these exercises proactively can help ensure better navigation of anxiety, inducing in social situations.
Stressors and Resources
The aim of this worksheet is to help clients identify key sources of stress and anxiety, and outline strategies or resources that can deal with them.
This worksheet is extremely helpful because it also identifies past, present, and anticipated sources of stress and anxiety. After completing this worksheet, clients should have a greater awareness of their triggers and the strategies that work best for them in social situations.
Coping Skills Inventory
The Coping Skills Inventory worksheet introduces six common and widely used coping skills that can be used when facing social anxiety.
The client is guided in selecting the most appropriate coping skill that will work for them in a given social situation. Identifying coping strategies before a stressful event is an excellent way to build self-awareness and those all-important internal resources.
Recommended reading
For more informative and practical articles on anxiety and coping, you may enjoy this selection of articles:
- How to Deal With Anxiety: 5 Coping Skills and Worksheets
- 18 Anxiety Worksheets for Adults, Teens, and More
- Anxiety Therapy: Types, Techniques, and Worksheets
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Social anxiety is a pervasive human experience and one we can all expect to encounter every now and again.
Whether we are at work, out with friends, or with family, some social events can and will trigger our fight-or-flight response.
Because life is fraught with stressful life events, trying to avoid them at all costs is not realistic or sustainable. Rather, it is better to be proactive in engaging in practices and techniques that will help us better cope with stress and anxiety as and when we need to.
We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Stress & Burnout Prevention Exercises (PDF) for free .
Physical symptoms can include an elevated heart rate, shortness of breath, sweaty palms, and feeling dizzy. Psychological symptoms can include feelings of panic or dread, rumination on negative thoughts, and a difficulty focusing on the here and now.
Social anxiety is not a mental illness. It is healthy and normal to experience mild physiological activation from time to time when faced with situations or tasks outside of our comfort zone. Often, low levels of anxiety are adaptive and can help us perform better. Only when social anxiety becomes intrusive to daily functioning, can social anxiety disorder be considered, as identified by the DSM -5.
Anxiety is highly prevalent worldwide, with about 309 million individuals experiencing an anxiety disorder in 2019 (World Health Organization, 2022). Since many individuals experience activated nervous systems in the face of social stressors, it is fair to say that social anxiety is extremely commonplace.
The activation of our autonomic nervous system causes social anxiety, which kicks into gear when a situation is perceived as stressful. The brain floods the body with adrenaline to prepare for action, and it is this adrenaline that causes many of the physical symptoms of social anxiety.
- American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.).
- Cannon, W. B. (1932). The wisdom of the body . Norton.
- Fredrickson, B. L. (2001). The role of positive emotions in positive psychology: The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. American Psychologist , 56 (3), 218–226.
- Gu, J., Strauss, C., Bond, R., & Cavanagh, K. (2015). How do mindfulness-based cognitive therapy and mindfulness-based stress reduction improve mental health and wellbeing? A systematic review and meta-analysis of mediation studies. Clinical Psychology Review , 37 , 1–12.
- Kirschbaum, C., Pirke, K. M., & Hellhammer, D. H. (1993). The ‘Trier Social Stress Test’—A tool for investigating psychobiological stress responses in a laboratory setting. Neuropsychobiology , 28 (1–2), 76–81.
- Kofman, O., Meiran, N., Greenberg, E., Balas, M., & Cohen, H. (2006). Enhanced performance on executive functions associated with examination stress: Evidence from task-switching and Stroop paradigms. Cognition & Emotion , 20 (5), 577–595.
- McEwen, B. S., & Stellar, E. (1993). Stress and the individual: Mechanisms leading to disease. Archives of Internal Medicine , 153 (18), 2093–2101.
- Penedo, F. J., & Dahn, J. R. (2005). Exercise and well-being: a review of mental and physical health benefits associated with physical activity. Current Opinion in Psychiatry , 18 (2), 189–193.
- Sapolsky, R. M. (2004). Why zebras don’t get ulcers: The acclaimed guide to stress, stress-related diseases, and coping (3rd ed.). Henry Holt and Company.
- Stein, M. B., & Stein, D. J. (2008). Social anxiety disorder. The Lancet , 371 (9618), 1115–1125.
- Weissman, D. G., & Mendes, W. B. (2021). Correlation of sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system activity during rest and acute stress tasks. International Journal of Psychophysiology , 162 , 60–68.
- World Health Organization. (2022). Mental disorders . Retrieved June 15, 2023, from https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/mental-disorders.
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The article provides insights into social anxiety and offers techniques and exercises to help individuals manage and overcome it. It distinguishes between mild social anxiety and social anxiety disorder, highlighting the symptoms and criteria for the disorder. The article discusses social anxiety in various contexts, such as the workplace and public speaking, and provides practical strategies to cope with anxiety in those situations. It also suggests preventive practices like physical exercise, mindfulness, and cognitive-behavioral therapy to build internal resources. The self-help exercises provided can assist individuals in managing their social anxiety effectively.
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To Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking, Stop Thinking About Yourself
- Sarah Gershman
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Tips for before and during your presentation.
Even the most confident speakers find ways to distance themselves from their audience. It’s how our brains are programmed, so how can we overcome it? Human generosity. The key to calming the amygdala and disarming our panic button is to turn the focus away from ourselves — away from whether we will mess up or whether the audience will like us — and toward helping the audience. Showing kindness and generosity to others has been shown to activate the vagus nerve, which has the power to calm the fight-or-flight response. When we are kind to others, we tend to feel calmer and less stressed. The same principle applies in speaking. When we approach speaking with a spirit of generosity, we counteract the sensation of being under attack and we feel less nervous.
Most of us — even those at the top — struggle with public-speaking anxiety. When I ask my clients what makes them nervous, invariably they respond with the same answers:
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- Sarah Gershman is an executive speech coach and CEO of Green Room Speakers. She is a professor at the McDonough School of Business at Georgetown University, where she teaches public speaking to leaders from around the globe.
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People with social anxiety: how do you deal with presentations?
So far ive done a few presentations in my college life.
was for my Spanish class. For both Spanish 1 and 2. The teacher allowed us to Literally just read from the slides since she knew that most people weren't good at talking Spanish. So thats how I managed to do it even though I'm fluent in Spanish.
For a computee science class. Long story short, it was a train wreak. i stuttered and it was awful and cringy. I blame myself for not being prepared.
Supposubly it was for a physics class but I chose not to do it and got a 0. Although i still passed with a low 70 though since it was like 20% so its all good.
Speech class. I enrolled I this class twice and twice I dropped it because I just can't deal with the pressure of speaking in class. I managed to 'survive' the first couple of weeks in this class but stopped attending since just sitting in the lecture room, id start to feel incredibly nervous, shaky and uneasy.
I'm currently taking a class that requires me to do a presentation at the end of the semester. Obviously I'm not sure if ill be able to pass this one since its worth 30% of my overall grade.
Overrall, ive always been quiet and shy. I dont have friends at college. At first I hated that but I learned to be ok with it and it doesn't bother me no more. The only friends I have are my old high school friends but I rarely see them since they don't go to college.I tried following the classic 'join a club' advice and I did do it. It always emds up the same. Everyone is has their groups of friends. Even if I do try to interact with them, they usually briefly reply but them focus on what their group is doing. I did briefly volunteer but the same thing would happen.
My grades are bad because I would rather just use Google to get answers to questions rather than go to office hours. I have no internships but tried to go to career fairs. Most of the time it ends up the same. I come of as awkward and weird.
Part of me feels like ill never get my degree because I just can't deal with speaking in class or people in general and I've considered dropping completely. I realize that as I advance further in my degree (Computer science), I'm required to do more presentations.
So I'm curious how y'all introverts/socially anxious/awkward people managed to survive this?
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12 Powerful Ways to Help Overcome Social Anxiety
Simple steps to feeling more socially confident..
Posted July 17, 2020 | Reviewed by Kaja Perina
- What Is Anxiety?
- Take our Generalized Anxiety Disorder Test
- Find a therapist to overcome anxiety
Social anxiety disorder is often misunderstood, and many people could be suffering in silence. It’s much more than feeling shy and not wanting to speak up in big groups. It can really take control and impede your everyday life. Anxiety Care UK states that social anxiety is a common and distressing condition, with as many as 40 percent of the population suffering from it.
Young People With Social Anxiety
Experiencing social anxiety and fear of social interactions can make simple responsibilities almost impossible to overcome. An estimated 15 million American adults have social anxiety, according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, with young adolescents who are transitioning to secondary school or college being particularly vulnerable. It’s suggested that social anxiety disorder symptoms usually begin around the age of 13.
The good news is that there are ways to develop new habits to help ease and overcome your social anxiety.
1. Challenge your negative and anxious thoughts. At times it may feel like there’s nothing you can do about the way you feel and how you think. In reality, though, there are a number of things that can help.
Challenging your mentality and negative thoughts can be an effective way to reduce symptoms of social anxiety. Start by identifying the anxious thoughts that automatically pop into your head when you think of social situations. Next, analyze these thoughts and challenge them. Question why you think like this and if your first reaction is actually how you feel or you’re just always assuming the worst. Changing the way you think is a long journey and is not an immediate fix, but the mind is a powerful thing, and it is possible.
2. Be mindful. Being mindful and practicing mindful meditation helps you to be present and aware of your thoughts and feelings in a non-judgmental and positive way. In a study published in the journal Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience , researchers found that meditation has effects on activity in particular areas of the brain. Participants who had normal levels of anxiety took part in four 20-minute mindfulness meditation classes. They found up to a 39 percent decrease in anxiety levels after mindfulness training.
3. Go to a coffee shop. If you enjoy watching movies online or catching up on your favorite TV show, then try taking your tablet or laptop to your nearest coffee shop. Do an activity you like and feel comfortable with, in an environment that would usually make you anxious. You have the familiarity and comfort of being able to concentrate only on what you’re doing, but will be pushing your boundaries . Hopefully, you can push yourself but remain in your mental comfort zone at the same time.
4. Create an exposure hierarchy. Identify and rate how each social situation makes you feel in terms of anxiousness. For example, 0 would mean no anxiety, and 10 would be a full-blown panic attack.
Make a list and write down how you think you would feel for every situation, no matter how small or big. From walking into a room at a gathering to asking a stranger on the tube for the time. It’s important to write down on a piece of paper your predictions so that when the time comes to experience it, you know how you thought you would feel.
5. Don’t focus on yourself. It’s hard to stop the endless mind chatter when you’re in situations that make you particularly anxious. We often turn inward and focus on ourselves and how others will perceive us, almost always assuming it will be negative. The thought that everyone will be looking at you when you walk into a room and judging you in one way or another? This isn’t the case.
Stop focusing on yourself and what other people are thinking of you. Focus on other people, try to be present, and make genuine connections. No one’s perfect, so try to be in the moment and actually listen to what is being said.
6. Adopt a healthier lifestyle to reduce anxiety. The mind and body are linked, and how you treat your body can have a significant impact on the rest of your life, including your anxiety levels. Making small lifestyle changes can help to improve your self-confidence and your ability to cope with anxiety symptoms. Avoid or limit your caffeine intake by not drinking coffee or caffeinated drinks after a certain time. Energy drinks act as a stimulant and can increase anxiety symptoms. Make physical exercise a priority in your day and always try to be active at some point; even taking a brisk walk during your lunch hour is a great way to fit it in.
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Drink alcohol only in moderation; although it may feel like it calms your nerves, it can also increase your chances of having an anxiety attack. Drink plenty of water, stay hydrated, and get enough high-quality sleep. When you’re deprived of sleep, you’re much more vulnerable to anxiety, and your mood can be affected greatly. New research suggests that sleep deprivation can actually cause an anxiety disorder.
7. Take a breath. The physical symptoms of anxiety include increased heart rate, pounding chest, dizziness, and muscle tension. Learning to take a minute and slow down your breath can help you take back control of your body.
Simply take a seat, get comfortable, and take the biggest breath you’ve taken all day and hold it in for four seconds. Then exhale slowly, pushing out as much air as possible. Take another deep breath filling the stomach with air and continue until you feel your breath slowing down to its normal rate.
8. Act confidently. There are a large number of adults suffering from social phobia and crippling shyness. You can learn to be confident in the same way you learned to ride a bike. Act more confidently, and people will react positively.
This doesn’t mean you need to be the class clown or the center of attention . It’s just about being more assertive . Something that feels terrifying at first will gradually feel better each time.
9. Find social situations and engage. Make a conscious effort to be more social. Actively look for supportive social environments that can help you overcome your fears. Perhaps start with a social skills training class. Here you can properly practice your social interactions before heading out into the real world. This will give you some tips on what to say and do when you find yourself in a social situation you’re unfamiliar with or anxious about.
10. Be kind to yourself. Nobody’s perfect, and everyone feels embarrassed at one point or another in their life. Overcoming social anxiety is by no means easy. You’ll have times where you think negatively and slip back into old habits. If you’re feeling run down or tired, you may find yourself feeling more anxious than normal, but it doesn’t mean you’ve failed. Just take a minute, focus on the present, and practice the techniques you’ve been working on.
11. Talk. By overcoming social anxiety and shyness, you will hopefully start feeling more confident during conversations. Talking to someone can be very challenging, and knowing what to say isn’t easy. Sometimes an awkward silence can feel like it lasts a lifetime. Talking to people gradually will help you be less anxious each time.
12. Face your fears. The final step is to face your fears. It’s impossible to overcome social anxiety if you don’t expose yourself to situations that make you anxious. By using avoidance as a tool to cope, you won’t be helping yourself or encouraging personal growth.
Numerous studies have shown that exposure therapy , facing your fears, is effective in treating anxiety disorders. Research does suggest, however, that exposure should be applied gently. Therefore take part in a social interaction or activity that only slightly provokes your anxiety and work your way up.
Overcoming social anxiety is a long journey, and it takes time for new neural pathways for social interactions to form. Is your social anxiety constantly interfering with your daily life? Then don’t hesitate to seek professional help in whatever form you feel comfortable looking for. These are great ways to help overcome your social anxiety. Although it seems like an impossible obstacle, it’s so worth overcoming, so you can live your life to the fullest.
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- Social anxiety disorder (social phobia)
It's normal to feel nervous in some social situations. For example, going on a date or giving a presentation may cause that feeling of butterflies in your stomach. But in social anxiety disorder, also called social phobia, everyday interactions cause significant anxiety, self-consciousness and embarrassment because you fear being scrutinized or judged negatively by others.
In social anxiety disorder, fear and anxiety lead to avoidance that can disrupt your life. Severe stress can affect your relationships, daily routines, work, school or other activities.
Social anxiety disorder can be a chronic mental health condition, but learning coping skills in psychotherapy and taking medications can help you gain confidence and improve your ability to interact with others.
Social anxiety disorder care at Mayo Clinic
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Feelings of shyness or discomfort in certain situations aren't necessarily signs of social anxiety disorder, particularly in children. Comfort levels in social situations vary, depending on personality traits and life experiences. Some people are naturally reserved and others are more outgoing.
In contrast to everyday nervousness, social anxiety disorder includes fear, anxiety and avoidance that interfere with relationships, daily routines, work, school or other activities. Social anxiety disorder typically begins in the early to mid-teens, though it can sometimes start in younger children or in adults.
Emotional and behavioral symptoms
Signs and symptoms of social anxiety disorder can include constant:
- Fear of situations in which you may be judged negatively
- Worry about embarrassing or humiliating yourself
- Intense fear of interacting or talking with strangers
- Fear that others will notice that you look anxious
- Fear of physical symptoms that may cause you embarrassment, such as blushing, sweating, trembling or having a shaky voice
- Avoidance of doing things or speaking to people out of fear of embarrassment
- Avoidance of situations where you might be the center of attention
- Anxiety in anticipation of a feared activity or event
- Intense fear or anxiety during social situations
- Analysis of your performance and identification of flaws in your interactions after a social situation
- Expectation of the worst possible consequences from a negative experience during a social situation
For children, anxiety about interacting with adults or peers may be shown by crying, having temper tantrums, clinging to parents or refusing to speak in social situations.
Performance type of social anxiety disorder is when you experience intense fear and anxiety during speaking or performing in public but not in other types of more general social situations.
Physical symptoms
Physical signs and symptoms can sometimes accompany social anxiety disorder and may include:
- Fast heartbeat
- Upset stomach or nausea
- Trouble catching your breath
- Dizziness or lightheadedness
- Feeling that your mind has gone blank
- Muscle tension
Avoiding common social situations
Common, everyday experiences may be hard to endure when you have social anxiety disorder, including:
- Interacting with unfamiliar people or strangers
- Attending parties or social gatherings
- Going to work or school
- Starting conversations
- Making eye contact
- Entering a room in which people are already seated
- Returning items to a store
- Eating in front of others
- Using a public restroom
Social anxiety disorder symptoms can change over time. They may flare up if you're facing a lot of changes, stress or demands in your life. Although avoiding situations that produce anxiety may make you feel better in the short term, your anxiety is likely to continue over the long term if you don't get treatment.
When to see a doctor
See your doctor or a mental health professional if you fear and avoid normal social situations because they cause embarrassment, worry or panic.
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Like many other mental health conditions, social anxiety disorder likely arises from a complex interaction of biological and environmental factors. Possible causes include:
- Inherited traits. Anxiety disorders tend to run in families. However, it isn't entirely clear how much of this may be due to genetics and how much is due to learned behavior.
- Brain structure. A structure in the brain called the amygdala (uh-MIG-duh-luh) may play a role in controlling the fear response. People who have an overactive amygdala may have a heightened fear response, causing increased anxiety in social situations.
- Environment. Social anxiety disorder may be a learned behavior — some people may develop significant anxiety after an unpleasant or embarrassing social situation. Also, there may be an association between social anxiety disorder and parents who either model anxious behavior in social situations or are more controlling or overprotective of their children.
Risk factors
Several factors can increase the risk of developing social anxiety disorder, including:
- Family history. You're more likely to develop social anxiety disorder if your biological parents or siblings have the condition.
- Negative experiences. Children who experience teasing, bullying, rejection, ridicule or humiliation may be more prone to social anxiety disorder. In addition, other negative events in life, such as family conflict, trauma or abuse, may be associated with this disorder.
- Temperament. Children who are shy, timid, withdrawn or restrained when facing new situations or people may be at greater risk.
- New social or work demands. Social anxiety disorder symptoms typically start in the teenage years, but meeting new people, giving a speech in public or making an important work presentation may trigger symptoms for the first time.
- Having an appearance or condition that draws attention. For example, facial disfigurement, stuttering or tremors due to Parkinson's disease can increase feelings of self-consciousness and may trigger social anxiety disorder in some people.
Complications
Left untreated, social anxiety disorder can control your life. Anxieties can interfere with work, school, relationships or enjoyment of life. This disorder can cause:
- Low self-esteem
- Trouble being assertive
- Negative self-talk
- Hypersensitivity to criticism
- Poor social skills
- Isolation and difficult social relationships
- Low academic and employment achievement
- Substance abuse, such as drinking too much alcohol
- Suicide or suicide attempts
Other anxiety disorders and certain other mental health disorders, particularly major depressive disorder and substance abuse problems, often occur with social anxiety disorder.
There's no way to predict what will cause someone to develop an anxiety disorder, but you can take steps to reduce the impact of symptoms if you're anxious:
- Get help early. Anxiety, like many other mental health conditions, can be harder to treat if you wait.
- Keep a journal. Keeping track of your personal life can help you and your mental health professional identify what's causing you stress and what seems to help you feel better.
- Set priorities in your life. You can reduce anxiety by carefully managing your time and energy. Make sure that you spend time doing things you enjoy.
- Avoid unhealthy substance use. Alcohol and drug use and even caffeine or nicotine use can cause or worsen anxiety. If you're addicted to any of these substances, quitting can make you anxious. If you can't quit on your own, see your health care provider or find a treatment program or support group to help you.
Social anxiety disorder (social phobia) care at Mayo Clinic
- Social anxiety disorder (social phobia). In: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM-5. 5th ed. American Psychiatric Association; 2013. http://dsm.psychiatryonline.org. Accessed May 21, 2021.
- Gabbard GO, ed. Social anxiety disorder (social phobia). In: Gabbard's Treatments of Psychiatric Disorders. 5th ed. American Psychiatric Association; 2014. http://psychiatryonline.org/doi/book/10.1176/appi.books.9781585625048. Accessed May 21, 2021.
- Schneier FR. Social anxiety disorder in adults: Epidemiology, clinical manifestations, and diagnosis. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Stein MB, et al. Approach to treating social anxiety disorder in adults. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Hofmann SG. Psychotherapy for social anxiety disorder in adults. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Stein MB. Pharmacotherapy for social anxiety disorder in adults. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Bystritsky A. Complementary and alternative treatments for anxiety symptoms and disorders: Herbs and medications. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Bystritsky A. Complementary and alternative treatments for anxiety symptoms and disorders: Physical, cognitive, and spiritual interventions. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Social anxiety disorder: More than just shyness. National Institute of Mental Health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/social-anxiety-disorder-more-than-just-shyness/index.shtml. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Natural medicines in the clinical management of anxiety. Natural Medicines. https://naturalmedicines.therapeuticresearch.com. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Sawchuk CN (expert opinion). Mayo Clinic. April 29, 2021.
- AskMayoExpert. Anxiety disorders. Mayo Clinic; 2020. Accessed April 8, 2021.
- Brown A. Allscripts EPSi. Mayo Clinic. Sept. 11, 2020.
- Valerian. Natural Medicines. https://naturalmedicines.therapeuticresearch.com. Accessed April 12, 2021.
- Sarris J, et al., eds. Anxiety. In: Clinical Naturopathy. 3rd ed. Elsevier; 2019. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed April 12, 2021.
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What’s public speaking anxiety?
10 symptoms of public speaking anxiety, 10 common public speaking stressors, how to overcome public speaking anxiety: 10 tips, diagnosing and treating public speaking anxiety, speak with confidence.
Your opinion and expertise matter, so it can be frustrating when public speaking nerves leave you speechless. Maybe your heart races and you trip over your words, or you spend most of your presentation hoping no one asks questions. Fear not. Public speaking anxiety is a common experience that impacts even the most confident people — and it’s manageable.
The intense nerves associated with public speaking aren’t reserved for being on stage in front of a large audience. Discomfort might occur during small team presentations , a sales pitch with a client, or group brainstorming sessions . The stress may be so potent that you avoid important opportunities to showcase your expertise and advance your career.
But identifying triggers and understanding your physiological response will help you overcome your anxiety. With practice and support, you’ll fearlessly share your important thoughts and opinions with others.
Public speaking anxiety, or glossophobia, is the most common subset of social anxiety, affecting about 3–5% of the general population and 80% of people with social phobias . Those with glossophobia feel anxiety symptoms , like a racing heartbeat and stressful thoughts, when sharing ideas or asking questions in front of others. And those who experience public speaking anxiety often feel more general performance anxiety during activities like striking up a conversation with a stranger or eating in public.
But why does public speaking cause anxiety? According to an article by the Harvard Business Review, our ancestors perceived being watched as a predatory threat , so our brains evolved to have a fight-or-flight response . This is the body’s physiological response to danger, activating the nervous system to encourage us to return to safety.
While public speaking doesn’t present real physical dangers, social anxiety can trigger your stress response . Worrying about people judging you, making a mistake , or messing up an important professional opportunity are visceral fears that send messages to the brain to seek protection.
In some cases, an acute fear can be motivating . Worrying about underperforming during a client presentation or making the right first impression at a face-to-face networking event could compel you to practice and perfect your speech.
But a chronic and debilitating fear of public speaking can disrupt your career. You may become avoidant and miss important opportunities to show off your expertise, establish your personal brand , and achieve professional development goals .
Publi c speaking anxiety is so all-encompassing you may not be conscientious of all the ways this type of stress affects the body. Acute anxiety symptoms are widespread and vary between people , but here are 10 common signs to be aware of:
Increased heart rate
Lack of concentration
Avoidant behaviors like social isolation
Shortness of breath
Panic attacks
Intrusive thoughts
Shaky hands and legs
While you might associate public speaking anxiety with delivering a Ted Talk or corporate event presentation, plenty of everyday situations can trigger your fear of performing. Here are 10 common stressors of public speaking anxiety:
Meeting new colleagues or coworkers
Job interviews
Sharing ideas in a brainstorming session
Giving a small presentation
Training new coworkers
Debriefing your team or managers on an ongoing project
Offering your opinion during a virtual meeting
Delivering an elevator pitch
Participating in a board meeting
Offering someone constructive criticism
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Like any other challenge, thoughtful practice, care, and patience will help you approach public speaking confidently. Here are 10 tips for public speaking anxiety sufferers looking to improve.
1. Don’t expect perfection
Perfection is an unrealistic expectation that distracts from your good work and amplifies your anxiety. Instead of aiming for perfection , celebrate your improvements and seek out continuous learning opportunities . Every chance to speak in front of others is a chance to learn and grow — even if it means a few awkward pauses or stumbling over your words occasionally.
2. Be yourself
While keeping your body language and humor professional, be your most authentic self and stick with what feels comfortable. Imitating others’ speaking styles could make you overthink each gesture or appear unnatural and insincere. And the more you step into your authenticity at work , the more comfortable you’ll feel being yourself in every area of your life.
3. Remember your purpose
Whether delivering a presentation or making a sale, you’re speaking in public for a reason. Think about why you’re there — be it to share your experience or teach others — and focus on this core purpose. Doing so might get you out of your head and into the situation at hand so you can concentrate less on your anxiety symptoms and more on accomplishing your task.
4. Prepare and practice
The best way to feel comfortable speaking in front of others is to practice. Speech anxiety often focuses on the unknown, like audience questions or complex presentation materials. But subject-matter-familiarity quiets some of these questions and offers answers.
You can jot down and prepare for questions you expect or memorize your materials so they feel less overwhelming. And p racticing your delivery and body language can take away the shock of talking to a group because you have less to worry about.
5. Let your coworkers know
Consider informing coworkers and managers about your stage fright so they know to support you. They might make adjustments like offering you additional notice regarding presentations they’d like you to make or taking your questions last in a meeting so you have more time to calm your nerves. And you can also ask team members for feedback and encouragement on your public speaking skills .
6. Visualize success
Use visualization , positive self-talk , and other manifestation methods to picture yourself confidently speaking in public. These positive projections can become a self-fulfilling prophecy as you do what’s necessary to make your vision a reality. You could also try anxiety journaling to shake negative automatic thoughts and track your positive thinking progress.
7. Make eye contact
If you fear public speaking, you may instinctively avoid eye contact because it feels intimate or intimidating. But chances are everyone wants to encourage you, and you can feed off the room’s energy by looking your audience in the eye. If you see heads nodding and people paying attention, you may gain the confidence boost you need to continue nerves-free.
8. Pose for success
Standing i n power poses (body postures expressing strength and assertiveness ) signals to audience members that you’re confident and comfortable. And embracing these postures can make you feel that way, too. For in-person speaking, try keeping your feet hip-distance and your shoulders back. And if you’re on a virtual call and have the option to stand, you can still carry yourself confidently to boost your own self-esteem. If you must sit, you can still hold your head high and posture straight.
9. Create a plan
Feel in charge of your public speaking journey by creating an improvement plan. Start by outlining small objectives, like starting two conversations with colleagues each week or contributing an idea at a team meeting. Then, define larger goals further down your improvement timeline, like leading a brainstorming session or training a new coworker. You could also work with a career coach t o build the right plan for you and track your success.
10. Take a class
Structured learning might be the best way to reduce your public speaking anxiety and gain practice. Try asking your employer whether they subsidize professional development opportunities like a public speaking course or mentorship programs . Or invest in yourself by signing up for an after-hours class with a friend so you can hold each other accountable .
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, public speaking anxiety is classified as a social anxiety disorder that causes symptoms like intense distress and panic attacks. While it’s common to feel nervous in social situations, a mental health professional might diagnose someone with public speaking anxiety if that person experiences symptoms that affect their day-to-day health, like missing out on job opportunities or having to leave a meeting due to nerves.
While social anxiety may feel overwhelming, the good news is that it’s treatable. The first step is finding a diagnosis. Treatment generally begins by identifying the root cause and any related medical conditions to ensure a larger issue isn’t causing your symptoms . Then, you’ll work with your mental health professional to determine the best treatment plan. Common remedies include psychotherapy, medication, or both. In some circumstances, you may also seek the help of a support group or work with a life coach to build an action plan .
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What you have to say matters, and you deserve to feel confident and comfortable when expressing yourself. While public speaking anxiety might quiet your voice, it doesn’t have to define your professional future.
Now that you have some public speaking tips for anxiety, it’s time to start working toward easing your symptoms. Depending on the severity of your nerves, consider consulting with a mental health professional, career coach, or support group. From there, you can build an appropriate plan and begin speaking — one small speech at a time — with newfound confidence.
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Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.
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“The Berent Method integrates technique with core work. Technique is the paradox of learning to become adrenaline friendly. Core work resolves the emotions of embarrassment, shame, and humiliation. The objective of treatment is to master the psycho-physiology of performance.”
Treatment available worldwide via telephone or skype also in our great neck office, listen to kendra world-renowned physician describes her “cure” for public speaking anxiety disorder, listen to tom sr. executive of a multi-billion dollar company, describe how he changed his life by resolving his deep rooted public speaking anxiety., interviews with patients who have resolved public speaking anxiety the most "evidence-based" clinical success since 1978, new podcast:, public speaking anxiety & fear of being noticeably nervous: mind surgery for high performers.
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Glossophobia or speech anxiety is the fear of public speaking or of speaking in general. The word glossophobia comes from the Greek glossa, meaning tongue, and phobos, fear or dread. Public speaking anxiety becomes a “disorder” when avoidance (phobia) occurs and when the mental and/or physical pain of the anxiety is substantial.
Almost everyone has heard that fear of public speaking is higher on the anxiety hierarchy than death for most people, but it’s hard to understand the reason for this.
Consider why: Carol was a homemaker and mother of two. She was an ovarian cancer survivor who once said “ I’d rather be back in chemotherapy than speak in from of a group. With the cancer there was no judgment. ”
Treatment with thousands of patients with public speaking anxiety at Berent Associates has demonstrated that the specific fear of judgment about being noticeably nervous is the singular most common cause that drives the fear. Examples of fear of being noticeably nervous include erythrophobia (fear of blushing), hyperhidrosis (sweating), voice stammering, and selective mutism .
The fear of being noticeably nervous is a big part of the untold story. One of the reasons this piece of the story is not well known is that many public anxiety sufferers are perfectionists. The last thing a perfectionist will do is admit they are not perfect. While the perfectionism is often a major positive variable for career success, it’s also been the energy that drives the anxiety. In “ Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder as Etiology for Performance Anxiety, ” Jonathan Beren t describes how perfectionism drives performance and social anxiety.
Being noticeably nervous activates unresolved emotional pathology in one’s “reservoir.” This recycling energy is the force that drives physical symptoms. Most glossophobia sufferers can relate to the fight-or-flight response being overly reactive in a group challenge scenario. What they don’t realize is that their internal critical script drives the adrenaline, which drives the anxiety.
Many sufferers have at one time been good public speakers only to suffer a panic attack seemingly out of nowhere. Once this trauma occurs, hypervigilance and obsessive worry about upcoming challenges dominate, and can wreak havoc on their overall mood and career or academic performance.
![does presentation help social anxiety fate](https://www.social-anxiety.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/fate.jpg)
Effective treatment requires an architecture of F.A.T.E. (See Figure 1).
Anything less than this architecture trivializes public speaking anxiety disorder.
“It’s wonderful to strive for peak performance. It’s absurd to be paralyzed by fear of not being perfect.”
Performance anxiety within a public speaking context is based on worries about being noticeably nervous and losing control due to panic. Physical symptoms such as increased pulse, blushing , breaking out into a sweat , nausea, and eye contact difficulty are common. A myriad of deeper negative thoughts run rampant such as, “people will see who I really am”; “I will humiliate myself”; or “people will not get to see my true ability”. These are characterized by varying degrees of obsessive thinking. When public speaking anxiety and panic turn into avoidance, a social phobia is present. The more avoidance takes place, the more there is the risk of an avoidant personality disorder developing.
Start the process: Resolve Your Performance Anxiety
If you understand your public speaking challenge as an anxiety problem rather than just a skills issue, and are truly motivated to change, this is the program for you. Your performance anxiety is resolvable when you learn to control “the physiology of performance”, and understand “autonomic hypersensitivity” concurrent to emotional and cognitive restructuring.
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Jonathan berent l.c.s.w. presents public speaking anxiety workshop to the national association of social workers, psycho-physiological therapy for public speaking anxiety & fear of being noticeably nervous.
Public speaking anxiety is the #1 phobia which is often driven by the fear of being noticeably nervous. Debilitating symptoms include panic attacks, fear of blushing (Erythrophobia), fear of sweating (hyper-hidrosis, voice freeze (selective mutism), and dissociation. These symptoms are driven by obsessive worry and perfectionism. This strategy can be utilized for social workers who experience this challenge. It also can be taught to their clients.
In this introductory workshop for social workers participants will learn the basic treatment architecture for public speaking performance anxiety.
Click Here to Listen
More Helpful Articles on Public Speaking Anxiety
A social anxiety perspective of the coronavirus, researching the research on cognitive behavioral therapy and social anxiety, jonathan berent announces first of its kind library of clinical interviews on public speaking and fear of being noticeably nervous, ask jonathan questions.
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22 Ways to Calm Your Nerves Before a Speech or Presentation
by Janice Tomich
- Fear of Public Speaking
So, you have a big presentation coming up. Maybe you’ve been invited to pitch an idea to your boss or deliver a presentation to an industry association. Maybe you’re even giving the keynote .
Your first reaction is to jump at the opportunity. Then, as the day gets closer your pre-presentation nerves start getting the better of you.
As your public speaking anxiety ramps up, you can hear the sound of your heart thumping in your ears. Your clothes are sticking to your skin. Nights before the big day you toss and turn in bed.
Thankfully there are lots of ways to manage your presentation jitters.
Notice the emphasis on the word “manage.”
Nervousness isn’t something you can entirely get rid of. But when you increase your skills—by learning these anxiety management techniques—you can begin to quiet the feelings that fuel the unhelpful stories that take up far too much time in your head.
These are some of the tried-and-true tips I give to my public speaking coaching clients, many of whom struggle with nervousness when they have a presentation looming.
Table of Contents
How to Calm Down Before a Speech or Presentation: 22 Techniques
1. understand fight or flight.
Almost everyone feels some degree of nervousness when they need to present. Thanks to our Neanderthal ancestors, the body’s response to your amygdala getting hijacked and going into fight or flight is a deeply embedded, primal reaction.
Public speaking, however, is not the same as being attacked by a sabre toothed tiger.
The best way to manage this innate response is simply to realize that it’s part of your DNA, hardwired into what it means to be human. This awareness will help tamp down your public speaking nerves and put them in context.
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2. Nerves and Anxiety Are a Habit
Behaviours follows triggers. For many people, the fear of public speaking fuels overthinking and worrying, which then results in them feeling more anxious. According to Dr. Judd Brewer , this creates an anxiety loop in which we convince ourselves that we are being constructive and solving a problem.
When you feel your heart racing or your monkey brain telling you doomsday stories, notice where it feels tight or uncomfortable in your body. One way to begin managing your anxiety is to notice where in your body you’re feeling it from. As with the fight-or-flight response, simply knowing about the anxiety loop gives you insight can helps it to stop progressing.
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3. Take a Deep Breath
![does presentation help social anxiety Woman doing deep breathing exercises, which is an excellent way to relax before a presentation and calm presentation nerves.](https://janicetomich.com/wp-content/uploads/simona-andreas-gJh7PGlQTxQ-unsplash.jpg)
Breathing sounds easy!
Actually it’s not.
When you get anxious you’ll find yourself taking rapid breaths, restricted to the upper half of your chest. Physiologically, shallow breathing fuels nervous reactions. Instead, consciously take a few deep breaths. This will naturally regulate your heightened emotions. Your heart rate and you will instantly feel more relaxed.
If you have a Fitbit, Apple Watch or other device that monitors your heart rate you’ll be amazed to see how quickly your heart rate will drop by simply taking in a series of deep breaths. Try it!
4. Transform Your Nervous Energy Into Excitement
Anxiety and excitement are similar emotions. Both are high states of arousal accompanied by things such as a rapid heart rate, dry mouth, sweaty palms and sometimes a feeling or sensation of being “outside” of your body.
Typically, we view anxiety as negative and excitement as positive. Anxiety is uncomfortable. We’d much rather feel excitement than anxiety.
Because both are heightened states of arousal, however, you can actually trick your brain into feeling excited instead of anxious by using awareness and reframing techniques. Positive thinking and using affirming self-talk can flip the switch from anxiety to excitement.
Try it. The next time you feel anxiety bubbling up, simply say “I feel excited.” Yes, say it out loud!
Using this simple tip, it’s possible to change a negative mindset to a positive one. You’ve set yourself up nicely for your next presentation.
If you’re lost and unsure about how to make your presentation compelling, I can help.
5. Smile, Even if You’re Feeling Anxious
Smiling helps lower your stress level by releasing endorphins, which lowers your heart rate and blood pressure.
Yes, as easy as smiling!
6. Use Relaxation Exercises
![does presentation help social anxiety Listening to music is a form of relaxation, which can calm pre-presentation anxiety and help you stay grounded.](https://janicetomich.com/wp-content/uploads/eric-nopanen-8e0EHPUx3Mo-unsplash.jpg)
Meditation is the simple act of being aware of what’s in front of us … no yoga mat or meditation cushion required. Meditation can subdue the nervous tension that comes with delivering presentations.
Recently, a client shared with me his rather surprising meditative process. It’s slightly unusual (and had me laughing).
Before every presentation, he goes to a fast food restaurant and orders a cheeseburger. Then, he consciously watches as he orders his food, receives his order, and then eats it. Apparently this meditative ritual works for him every time.
A more common approach (than the cheeseburger routine) is to simply be observant of your environment while you’re walking, or consciously feel the sensation of water falling on your body when you take your morning shower.
Meditation techniques lower your anxiety because you won’t cycle through all worrying “what if’s”. Instead, simply be present.
7. Burn Off Energy by Doing Some Cardio
Moving your body and getting your heart pumping also releases endorphins which can help quell any pre-presentation anxiety .
I’ve been known to do a few fast-walking laps around a conference centre to reduce the stress I feel before I deliver a speech or presentation.
Going for a quick run or cycle before your event are terrific anxiety-busters too!
8. Use Visualization Techniques
Did you know you can strengthen muscles without even moving them ?
Elite athletes, such as golfers, practice watching (in their mind’s eye) their ball land on the green or in the cup. The visualization exercise builds muscle memory to help hit the ball successfully, so it lands where the golfer intended.
Public speakers can use visualization techniques to manage anxiety, too.
As your presentation day nears, take your mind on a walking tour. Imagine every detail – in your mind’s eye walk onto the stage, deliver your speech, listen to the applause, and then leave the stage. Do the visualization with a positive outlook to set yourself for an anxiety-free delivery.
9. Be Prepared
Preparing in the content of your presentation in the ‘theatre of your mind’ is a trap. Practicing this way lulls you into thinking that all is well as you run through your presentation self correcting.
Only practicing your actual words will prepare you for the live event. You’ll establish exactly what you want to say, and how to say it, which will boost your confidence and soothe any nervousness.
10. Practice, Practice, and Then Practice Some More
I have never had a client tell me they wished they’d practiced less.
My advice for how to practice delivering a speech or presentation is to practice until you are tired of hearing yourself, which typically clocks in at 30 hours of practice for a one-hour presentation .
Pro Tip: Once you have practiced your entire presentation a few times, you only practice the parts which are tripping you up. There’s no value in practicing from start to finish when you’re only challenged by specific sections.
11. Drink Water to Stay Hydrated During Your Presentation
![does presentation help social anxiety Drinking water and staying hydrated in the days leading up to your presentation can help with anxiety, too, since you'll be able to speak more clearly.](https://janicetomich.com/wp-content/uploads/manki-kim-12Kb5ynfxso-unsplash.jpg)
Having a dry mouth can cause you to trip over your words, which will rev up even more nervous tension. Beginning a few days before you’re scheduled to deliver your speech, increase your water intake so your words will flow easily.
Pro Tip: Pop one of these lozenges in your mouth a few minutes before you go on stage. They work wonders to coat your mouth and throat.
12. Prepare an Excellent Opening to Your Presentation
I don’t recommend memorizing your entire presentation or speech. But I do recommend memorizing the open and close.
Anxiety often ramps up in the first 30 seconds of your presentation. By committing to memory the beginning (and the close) you’ll prevent yourself from having a rocky start or lacklustre finish.
13. Employ the Power of the Pause
You likely talk too fast when you’re nervous. With the rapid fire of your words comes an increase in your stress level.
Pauses are a brilliant technique slow down your speech, and avoid talking too quickly.
Look through your presentation and find the most important points you want your audience to take back to the office. Place a pause in the front and back end of these sections.
Not only do pauses help your audience understand the important points, it gives you some breathing room and slows down your rate of speaking.
14. Before You Present, Test the Technology
![does presentation help social anxiety Man using a virtual reality machine—hopefully the tech you need to navigate for your upcoming presentation won't be this challenging.](https://janicetomich.com/wp-content/uploads/uriel-soberanes-MxVkWPiJALs-unsplash.jpg)
There’s nothing like technology not working to rattle your nerves — even for seasoned presenters.
Whether you’re online or in person, make sure you’re comfortable with the technology you’ll be using.
If you’re delivering online ask a friend or colleague to do a technology run-through.
If you’re delivering live on stage most event planners invite their presenters for a pre-presentation tech check.
Take advantage of the time to test the technology so you can deliver without having to worry about which button to click or where to stand.
15. Arrive Early, Before You’re Scheduled to Present
Whether online or in person, arrive 20 to 30 minutes before you’re scheduled to present.
Give yourself lots of time to settle in and feel comfortable in your surroundings. Arriving early will give you the opportunity to check out where everything is situated, which will stop any last minute scrambling that could leave you unsettled.
16. Walk Around. Own Your Space.
When you walk into a space cold — not having been on-site before — it’s challenging to know how much space you can take advantage of.
Take the time to walk around the presentation space (This applies to both live events and online ones.)
There is comfort in knowing how much “real estate” you have to move through. Feel your feet on the floor.
17. Attend Your Colleagues’ Presentations
Likewise, take the time to get comfortable in the event itself. Stop in and listen to your colleagues’ presentations, and encourage them to attend yours.
Building a sense of camaraderie helps you feel supported by your peers, which helps release the nervous energy soothe your pre-presentation jitters.
18. Meet Your Audience Before Your Presentation
![does presentation help social anxiety Two men speaking at a conference. Meeting other conference participants and attending your colleagues' presentations can help make your own presentation less nerve-wracking. It's a great way to calm your nerves before a presentation.](https://janicetomich.com/wp-content/uploads/product-school-mEpShydwItI-unsplash.jpg)
When I deliver a presentation I arrive well in advance of when I’m scheduled to deliver so I can meet the people who will be attending my talk.
It’s a good investment. Meeting your audience beforehand “warms” the room (makes you and them feel more comfortable). This allows you to better connect with your audience.
19. Connect Through Good Eye Contact
During your presentation, connect with the audience using effective eye contact. Make this an easy win by following tip #19 and reading my article with five tips for making eye contact while public speaking.
20. Use Powerful Body Language
Try slumping over. How do you feel? Low on energy?
Now stand tall with your shoulders back and your head held high. How do you feel now? I suspect you feel high energy/confident.
Your posture affects how you feel. The small shift from slumped to taking up lots of space makes a big difference to your level of confidence .
21. Avoid Alcohol & Caffeine in the Lead-Up to the Event
We all know the effects of excessive alcohol and caffeine. One will leave you too relaxed, and the other too jittery.
Save the drinks until after your presentation, and limit yourself to one cup of coffee or tea before you present to deliver your speech as the best version of yourself.
22. Sleep Well the Night Before
A day or two before you are scheduled to deliver your speech plan to have your slides completed and confident you know your content inside out.
Don’t spend the night before adjusting slides and practicing. Trying to create a perfect presentation at the last minute will only ramp up your anxiety.
Schedule lots of time to prepare in the weeks leading up to the event, so can feel refreshed to meet your audience.
If you’re struggling with presentation nerves choose a few of the techniques which resonated with you. Give them a try. It’s though practice and increasing your public speaking skills that you’ll get a handle on your nerves.
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Should We Force Shy Kids to Do Class Presentations?
Here’s what experts say..
Taylor Lorenz’s recent piece in the Atlantic about kids who want to abolish the in-class presentation has predictably triggered the kind of older people who think children today are far too pampered and indulged. But do these young critics of public presentations have a point? And—to pose a broader question about our requirements of the younger generation—should parents and educators force kids who are shy to do the social things that scare them? Lorenz asked kids and teachers their opinions. I wanted to see what psychologists thought.
There is a big difference between experiencing a garden-variety fear of public speaking, which is extremely common, and having social anxiety disorder. Young people with the latter, psychologist Jonathan Dalton told me, have extended physical responses to public speaking; it’s not the same as just being a little scared beforehand and coming through OK. “One of the things about social anxiety disorder that’s most pernicious is that nonsufferers have the illusion they understand it,” Dalton said. “They can say, ‘Oh, I understand this problem. I used to have a hard time giving a talk when I was in high school.’ That’s like saying ‘I have major depression’ and the teacher saying, ‘Oh, I used to be sad in high school too.’ ”
For people with anxiety disorders who have a fear of public speaking, Dalton said, the difference is physical. “The average person who’s giving a public presentation, their blood pressure and all those measurements of body activation will be elevated for about eight minutes when you begin a presentation,” Dalton said. “With someone with social anxiety disorder, it can be elevated for about 90 minutes.” The situation feels grave to the person suffering through it; Dalton said he once had a patient threaten suicide at school and end up hospitalized because of a mandated class presentation.
Still, Dalton said he doesn’t believe the answer should be to avoid presentations altogether. He said he counsels parents that avoidance of events that may provoke anxiety will only “make more room for anxiety to grow.” “So much of what we do is parent training,” Dalton, the director of the Center for Anxiety and Behavioral Change , told me. “The more compassionate the parent is, the more they want to reduce the child’s suffering. And I always tell the parents, ‘I promise you the anxiety will fill whatever space you give it.’ ”
Even setting aside a clinical diagnosis like social anxiety disorder, what we perceive as “shyness” itself may be partly biological—and not actually about shyness and sociability at all, but rather about a person’s reactions to unexpectedness and unfamiliarity. In their book The Long Shadow of Temperament , psychologists Jerome Kagan and Nancy Snidman wrote based on their findings that we could assess children as early as 4 months of age for a set of responses that would classify them as “inhibited” or “uninhibited.” “Inhibited” children react to unexpected events, like the appearance of a stranger or the popping of a balloon, with expressions of stress that “uninhibited” children don’t.
Kagan, Snidman, and other collaborators have followed children across their childhoods to see how those biologically determined temperaments did and didn’t affect children’s lives. In the end, they write, a naturally inhibited child might end up shy and reserved, or she might not; the temperamental bias “is embedded in a family context that, over time, creates a psychological profile.” The relationship between a child’s biologically determined temperament and the work that nurture does is infinitely complex, which is why this is an interesting research question .
Psychologist Doreen Arcus , studying these questions about temperament, found that inhibited children who lived with parents who practiced “authoritative parenting” in the kids’ first few years ended up what she described in a phone call as “less fearful, less timid, less stressed.” Children judged “inhibited” but whose parents placed strong limits on their behavior and let them protest those limits had experienced strong emotions, come through them, and realized that those emotions would come to a close. Arcus theorized this enabled those children to respond better to unfamiliar situations as they grew older. In explaining this to me, Arcus used the example of a toddler who is getting into the cat food. The parent might deny the child the experience of sticking her fingers in the kibble, by moving the bowl or the child, and endure the child’s protests before moving on to a new activity. Or the parent might distract the child with some other object of desire (Arcus used the Tupperware drawer as an example), so the baby never has the experience of being frustrated. The inhibited child who has been allowed to feel challenged in different situations had a better chance of losing some of his innate fearfulness.
Arcus said authoritative parenting—as opposed to permissive, neglectful, or authoritarian parenting, the less-effective alternatives —is about a mix of sensitivity and strong expectations. The steps she suggested to acclimate shy younger children to an activity they fear are the opposite of “throwing them in the deep end.” “Would your child really like to be swinging on the swings, but it’s just too painful?” she asked. “You can work up to things in small increments.” A parent could tell a child she can walk by the swings today, but she definitely needs to try to swing tomorrow. The next day, the parent could bring the child to the swings, and have her try swinging, but promise that she can leave after five minutes. “Sometimes, four minutes and 59 seconds comes, and the child is OK,” Arcus said. “And you can say, ‘You want to try another five minutes?’ ” Along the way, the parent should praise the victories. Authority, in this framework, looks more like responsive firmness than strict or angry insistence.
This concept of progressive acclimation, which Arcus described in the context of younger children who fear certain social situations, reminded me of the strategies Dalton told me he and his colleagues might pursue with patients with social anxiety disorder who were afraid of in-class presentations. He told me he might have the patient follow a multistep process: first, to read a kids’ book aloud, with an audience only of a psychologist; have the patient do an original presentation in front of a psychologist, with a camera on, and then email the file to the teacher; have the patient and the teacher watch that file together; have the patient do the presentation with a peer in the room; finally, have the patient do the presentation in class. It’s an art, Dalton said. “We don’t just throw the kid to the wolves and say, ‘It’s just anxiety, do this anyway.’ ” For kids without social anxiety disorder who have a more moderate fear of class presentations, teachers could do a modified version of this graduated introduction to the concept—presentations in pairs, then in groups, with conversations along the way about strategies you can use to cope with the fear that public speaking often arouses.
The answers I got from Dalton and Arcus, which confirm that avoidance is not the answer, might seem to reinforce the predictable arguments of people who think these kids need to suck it up. As the epigraph to the new Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt book The Coddling of the American Mind goes: “Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child.” The saying is attributed to “Folk wisdom, origin unknown.” The authors hold this idea up as evident common sense (even as their critics strongly refute its implications). Why let shy kids, such people grumble, claim an exemption for themselves? After all, we all did class presentations, and we survived.
But when it comes to shyness and social anxiety, “the road” has changed before. In the United States in 2018 we reward boldness, curiosity, self-assuredness, and social ease; the parent of a naturally uninhibited child will get a lot of compliments, even if some of that brazen sociability and lack of fear comes from the child’s biology. But it wasn’t always so. “Before Freud,” Kagan writes, “a child who conformed to parental requests, was cautious in dangerous situations, and remained quiet with adult strangers was regarded as having a good character. After Freud, this child was classified as anxious.” Historian Barbara Benedict writes , in a history of early modern inquiry, that children and adults who were very curious about the world were once seen as dangerous and disruptive instead of laudable founts of ingenuity. The Victorians perceived shyness, Joe Moran writes in his delightful cultural history of the trait , “as an unwavering disposition, a force one could never defeat, as fixed and as little one’s fault as a tendency to suffer from gout or piles.”
We older people think of the “road” as common sense, “the world the way it is.” Of course you have to be able to talk to people you’ve never met. Of course you’ll need to do presentations. That’s just the way it is. But as a parent or a teacher, you always make personal judgments about the things children will need to do in order to survive “the road.” In this argument, as in so many intergenerational conflicts, a little adult humility would go a long way. Yes, your child probably should present in class. But you don’t have to be a jerk about it.
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How to Manage Your Anxiety When Presenting
Do you get nervous speaking in public? Learn how to mitigate your fear.
January 29, 2016
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Presentation Anxiety: How to Overcome Stage Fright (Complete Guide)
Tyler Ellis
Glossophobia, the fear of public speaking, is thought to affect as much as 75% of the population. For both students and professionals alike, this phobia tends to take the form of presentation anxiety. So, how can we overcome stage fright and presentation anxiety once and for all?
While avoiding presentations may bring some short-term relief to your anxiety, this will worsen your stage fright in the long-run. To overcome presentation anxiety long-term, presentation tools and gradual practice are the most effective solutions.
Maybe, right now, you’re extremely anxious about a presentation coming up. Maybe the only thought racing through your mind is how in the world am I going to get out of giving this presentation?
No worries. This guide is going to cover everything – and I mean everything – you’ll need to know. Make sure not to skip the section on “alternative ways of presenting,” I think you’ll find those really useful!
No need to stress; let’s get right into this.
What Causes Presentation Anxiety?
First things first… why do we feel presentation anxiety in the first place?
Sure, we might expect our heart to pound and breathing to accelerate as we walk along the edge of a cliff – but during a presentation? What part of talking about George Washington Carver inventing peanut butter should cause our hands to tremble and our voice to stutter?
Well, as it turns out, presentation anxiety is caused by ancient mechanisms in our brain responsible for our survival. For anxious people, our brain perceives being the center of attention in large group to be a threat. This triggers the “fight or flight” response, causing us to panic as we try and escape our uncomfortable setting.
Obviously, we are in no real danger while giving a class presentation or work presentation. Many years of evolution, however, have trained us to avoid stage fright with a passion. In ancient times, being surround by a (potentially angry) mob could have fatal consequences; as could being humiliated, rejected, or otherwise cast out from the tribe.
For many of us – especially those of us prone to social anxiety – such fears have stuck with us since caveman times. It’s important we remember these fears are harmless. Just being aware of their nature can help with this process. Despite what your brain and body may be telling you, these feelings of anxiety are not dangerous; they are going to pass.
Feel free to check out this article for a better understanding of the evolutionary psychology behind anxiety .
How to Get Out of a Presentation
I recommend against avoidance in most cases, as it only reinforces our anxiety in the long-run.
However, I know what it’s like to be a student with presentation anxiety.
I know how hard it is juggling academics, a social life, relationships, and newly blossoming anxieties all at once. I know that it can get so bad the most logical option feels like dropping out of school altogether. I don’t want you to feel like you have to do that.
So, if you’re really just not ready to overcome your stage fright:
- Intentionally Choose Classes That Don’t Require Presentations
- Tell the Teacher or Professor About What You’re Going Through
- Ask the Teacher or Professor for Alternative Assignments
- For Group Presentations, Ask Someone Else to Take the Lead
- Present Your Assignment in an Alternative Format Using Presentation Tools and Software (more on this in a bit)
If this seems a bit vague, it’s only because I’ve actually dedicated an entire article to this topic already. Check out this piece on how to get out of giving a presentation in class for more help with this.
Like I said, ultimately, avoidance is a poor strategy. However, I believe it’s just as detrimental to be “forced” into facing our fears before we are mentally prepared to do so. Having been there myself, I want you to be able to rest easy knowing that you do have some options here.
For this guide, however, I want to focus more on how to actually overcome presentation anxiety and stage fright.
My secret is – believe it or not – I get incredibly nervous before public speaking, no matter how big the crowd or the audience and, um, despite the fact that I laugh and joke all the time I get incredibly nervous, if not anxious, actually, before going into rooms full of people when I'm wearing a suit... And now that I've confessed that, I'll probably be even more worried that people are looking at me.
Prince Harry - Duke of Sussex, Member of the British Royal Family
How to Stop a Panic Attack While Presenting in Class
When I first started having panic attacks, I had no idea what they were or why they were happening. Prior to my first panic attack, I had never had an issue with public speaking or presentation anxiety at all. In fact, I had voluntarily participated in several clubs and activities that required public speaking.
Yet, when my first few panic attacks started (I was around 16 at the time), they would occur in any random situation. Wherever they occurred, I'd quickly develop a phobia associated with that location or situation. One such random panic attack occurred – you guessed it – during a class presentation.
While this experience was terrifying, embarrassing, and extremely uncomfortable, I had – fortunately – managed to keep it together enough for most people not to notice. For the many class presentations that would follow, however, I had to develop some tricks to stop panic attacks while presenting in class.
Here’s what worked for me:
- Volunteer to go first. This may seem strange, but I always felt it easier to volunteer first and get it out of the way. Oftentimes, it’s easier to deal with presentation anxiety when we don’t feel cornered. By choosing to do it yourself, you maintain some control of the situation and get the jump on things before anticipation anxiety kicks in .
- Remember you are not going to die. This is just a panic attack, and it’s going to pass. It may be uncomfortable, but it will be over within a few moments.
- Take control of your breathing. 478 breathing is a simple technique that works. Simply breathe in for 4 seconds through the nose, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds through the mouth.
- Find a focus object. Choose a point, or several points, to focus on in the room. This could be a ceiling tile, a lightbulb, a pile of books, anything. Whenever your thoughts start to wander or spiral out of control, recenter your thoughts on that focus object.
- Try and remember the other times you’ve given a class presentation with anxiety. Chances are, this isn’t your first time. Remember those past successes and visualize this presentation as one where you overcome stage fright as well. If your mind is drawn to a time when it didn’t go so well, at least remind yourself that it passed and you survived it; just as you’ll survive this one.
- If you have a friend in the class, look to them from time to time. Flash them a smile or a wink, and try not to laugh out loud while you’re up there. This may seem silly, but I’d rather stifle a laugh than grapple a panic attack.
- Remember that no one’s really paying attention. Just as you were sitting at your desk nervously thinking about your own turn to present, most people are doing the exact same now. And even if they’re not anxious, they’re probably zoned out or drifting off; it’s quite difficult to keep an involuntary crowd’s attention. Trust me, they’re probably not thinking about you much.
These are just a few ways to stop a panic attack while presenting in class. Of course, just about any method for stopping panic attacks can work well here, so feel free to explore our site a bit to learn some other methods.
There are only two types of speakers in the world:
1. The nervous
Mark Twain - American humorist, novelist, and travel writer
Alternative Ways of Presenting to Help Overcome Stage Fright
If you take nothing else from this article, I believe that this is the section that can help anxious students and professionals with stage fright the most. When I was dealing with presentation anxiety myself, most of these options didn’t even exist. If you’re anxious about standing in front of class and presenting, any of these could be fantastic alternatives to presenting.
Basically, any of these presentation software tools can help you to quickly create a visually stunning presentation; all without having to speak in front of the class. They utilize audio, video, and/or animation to create informative videos that get the point across even more effectively than conventional presentations.
For the most part, all a teacher or boss really cares about is that you:
- Put hard work and dedication into your assignment
- Learned something throughout the process
- Are able to communicate what you learned to educate your peers
Telling the teacher “Sorry, I just can’t present today,” won’t meet any of these points, and is likely to land you a failed grade.
Instead, ask your teacher if you can use one of these presentation tools to create an even more engaging and informative presentation. This way, it’ll seem like you’ve put in the most effort in the class, rather than the least; all without having to speak in front of the class.
Here are the automated presentation tools I currently use myself and recommend:
I go into much greater detail on these tools here: automated presentation software . Before buying anything, I strongly suggest giving that article a read. Otherwise, Toonly and Doodly are my top picks.
What is the Best Presentation Anxiety Medication for Stage Fright?
Giving a presentation in high school or college can be extremely stressful for many people. If standing in front of the class feels like an impossible task, you may be wondering about presentation anxiety medication. So… what are the best drugs for presentation anxiety?
Since I’m not a doctor, I can only offer you a friendly opinion here.
In general, I think it’s a good idea to steer clear of anti-anxiety medication whenever it isn’t absolutely necessary. If your doctor prescribes you presentation anxiety medication, so be it. In the long-run, however, this can often create cycles of reliance and dependence that are best avoided.
But what about taking an over-the-counter supplement for anxiety before a presentation?
I have personally found one supplement to help me relax and communicate more confidently. This is my favorite supplement for stage fright, as it has helped me tremendously in situations where I would normally feel a bit socially anxious. I’ve used this supplement for presentations, job interviews, and even first dates.
My favorite supplement for presentation anxiety symptoms is phenibut. It just helps me feel significantly calmer while simultaneously boosting my sociability and confidence. This supplement is extremely affordable and legally sold online in most countries. If you want to learn a bit more about it, I have an article going into greater depth about phenibut here.
I do urge responsibility when using phenibut, as you don’t want to become reliant on it. But if it makes the difference between shirking your presentation vs. delivering a great one, I highly recommend it.
Let our advance worrying become advance thinking and planning
Winston Churchill - Former Prime Minister of the UK, Famous Orator
Tips for How to Present a Project Effectively
Few things help to eliminate anticipation anxiety like truly preparing for the situation. If your fears are rooted in delivering a poor or ineffective presentation, take some time to prepare.
Here are some tips for how to present a project effectively:
![How to Present a Project Effectively chart How to Present a Project Effectively chart](https://dontpanicdothis.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/How-to-Present-a-Project-Effectively-chart.png)
How to Overcome Stage Fright and Presentation Anxiety
There are many strategies we can take when dealing with our presentation anxiety or stage fright. Here are three of the most common strategies:
- Complete Avoidance – Post-college, public speaking occasions like presentations are pretty few and far between. As an adult, it isn’t too difficult to avoid presentations, although not overcoming stage fright can be a hinderance in many career fields.
- Reluctant and Occasional – Here’s where most people in the world probably fall. Most of us aren’t 100% comfortable with presenting, yet we suck it up and get it done when we have to. This isn’t a bad place to be, although it's uncomfortable occasionally.
- Conquering Presentation Anxiety – Some brave souls will choose to completely crush their fear of public speaking, overcoming stage fright and glossophobia entirely. This path is not for the faint of heart, as it isn’t easy; however, it has the largest payoff in the end with regard to career and confidence.
We’ve already discussed strategies for the first two earlier in this guide. Let’s now focus on the third.
How can we overcome presentation anxiety and glossophobia?
Well, whenever we want to eliminate a fear or phobia long-term, the best way to do so is through exposure therapy. We do have a full article on how to extinguish fears through exposure therapy if you’re curious to really understand this process.
For now, I’ll fill you in on the basics:
By gradually stepping outside of our comfort zone and exposing ourselves to our fears, we can eliminate those fears over time. The key here is that we are stepping a bit outside our comfort zone, but not immersing ourselves so fully to induce panic. In other words: challenge yourself at a fair pace.
![Comfort Zone vs. Growth Zone vs. Panic Zone comfort zone vs growth zone vs panic zone](https://dontpanicdothis.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Comfort-Zone-vs.-Growth-Zone-vs.-Panic-Zone.png)
So how do we apply this to overcome presentation anxiety and stage fright?
My suggestion would be to identify the smallest voluntary step you can take outside of your comfort zone without panicking. Perhaps presenting may induce a panic attack, but are you at least able to read aloud from your seat? Perhaps reading aloud is difficult, but could you at least volunteer an answer from time to time?
This process will be as unique as a fingerprint for each person, as we all have different comfort zones and stressors. Try and find where your comfort zone ends and take small steps just outside of it. With repeated practice, you’ll notice your comfort zone expanding as you become more confident with the activity.
![Exposure Hierarchy gradual exposure hierarchy image](https://dontpanicdothis.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Exposure-Hierarchy.png)
In general, here are some opportunities you may find useful for stepping outside of your comfort zone:
- Start raising your hand more often to ask or answer questions
- Volunteer to read aloud or answer a problem on the board whenever you’re feeling confident
- Create a presentation using presentation software (recommendations above), but see if you can actually get through it without relying on the audio. If you get too nervous, you can use it
- Rather than trying to get out of a presentation, ask your groupmates if you could take a lesser role with speaking; perhaps you could do more of the research to make up for it
- Seek out your local Toastmasters group to practice public speaking away from the pressures of your own social circles
- Try and attend small open mic nights and similar opportunities to gain experience with public speaking
Fun Fact: I successfully avoided presentations for the majority of my high school and college career. Afterward, I wound up working several jobs that forced me to confront this fear. First came a sales job, and next came a job that required me to speak in front of 150-200 people multiple times per day.
Turns out, I liked money more than I disliked public speaking.
List of Famous People with Public Speaking Anxiety
Sometimes a bit of solidarity goes a long way. Here’s a list of famous/successful people who have long been known to have suffered from public speaking anxiety:
- Winston Churchill
- Mahatma Gandhi
- Abraham Lincoln
- Prince Harry
- Warren Buffet
- Mark Zuckerberg
- Sigmund Freud
- Arnold Schwarzenegger
- Tiger Woods
- Rowan Atkinson
- Jackie Chan
- Thomas Jefferson
- Margaret Thatcher
- Princess Diana
- Eleanor Roosevelt
- Sir Richard Branson
As you can see… we’ve got some big names up there. And this is just a very small list of successful people who have been open about their public speaking anxiety – to say nothing of the silent majority!
Never forget, you’re far from alone in experiencing this – you can absolutely overcome presentation anxiety, stage fright, and glossophobia if you wish to!
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About the Author
Years of personal experience with anxiety disorders and panic attacks have led me to devise some pretty creative ways to keep my anxiety in check. In the past, anxiety and panic attacks felt like something I'd have to live with forever. Nowadays, panic attacks are a distant memory for me, and I'm free to pursue passions like writing and traveling the world. Hopefully, the information on this website can help you achieve the same. I do all the writing here myself, so don't hesitate to reach out with questions!
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Using Visualization to Reduce Anxiety Symptoms
This simple and effective technique can help calm your mind and body
Jamie Grill / Blend Images / Getty Images
- Getting Started
Anxiety is uncomfortable and distressing. If you regularly experience symptoms of anxiety, then you know how disruptive they can be to your everyday life. While getting professional treatment is important, there are also a number of self-help strategies that can be extremely helpful for managing symptoms of anxiety, including visualization.
Visualization is a popular relaxation technique that involves using your imagination to experience feelings such as peacefulness, confidence , or motivation . Visualization can also help reduce feelings of nervousness .
By enhancing your relaxation skills with visualization, you can lower your flight-or-fight response that is often triggered during times of increased anxiety.
At a Glance
If you're feeling anxious, harnessing the power of your imagination can be a useful tool for calming your mind and body. Visualization allows you to create a mental picture of scenes or settings that bring you a sense of comfort and peace. This strategy might involve using guided imagery to picture yourself in a tranquil location, imagining yourself achieving a goal, or meditating on thoughts of self-compassion. The good news is that this technique can be done anywhere, anytime. The key is to practice, use your creativity, and think about the things that help you feel calm when fear and worry start to creep in.
What Is Visualization?
Visualization is a powerful technique that can help relieve the symptoms of anxiety . The technique involves using mental imagery to achieve a more relaxed state of mind. Similar to daydreaming , visualization is accomplished through the use of your imagination. There are some people who are unable to picture images in their minds. This is known as aphantasia .
There are several reasons why visualization can help you cope with anxiety. Consider how your thoughts wander when you feel anxious. Your mind may focus on the worry , the worst things that can happen, and other cognitive distortions that only add to your sense of fearfulness.
Visualization works to expand your ability to rest and relax by focusing your mind on more calming and serene images.
Get Advice From The Verywell Mind Podcast
Hosted by therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares how to make visualization actually work for you.
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Types of Visualization
There are limitless ways to practice visualization. What you choose to picture in your mind is totally up to you, but the following are some common types of visualization.
Guided Imagery
The following is a beach scene visualization exercise that you can practice on your own. Beach scenes are a popular visualization due to their calming and tranquil impact. Feel free to get creative and change it to better suit your needs and imagination. Use guided visualizations like this one to relax, unwind and briefly escape from your day-to-day tasks.
Visualization Exercise: White Sandy Beach
Imagine that you are resting on a white sandy beach and feel safe, calm, and relaxed as you think about the following:
- Turquoise water and a clear, blue sky
- The sound of soft waves as the tide gently rolls in
- The weight of your body sinking into your beach chair
- The warmth of the sand on your feet
- A large umbrella keeping you slightly shaded, creating just the right temperature
Relax your face and let go of any tension in your forehead, between your eyebrows, your neck, and your throat. Soften your eyes and rest. Allow your breath to slow down and match the rolling waves of the water. It is effortless to be here; spend time just taking it all in.
Once this relaxation feels complete, imagine that you get up and slowly walk away from the beach. Remember that this beautiful place is here for you whenever you need to come back. Take your time and slowly open your eyes.
If the beach scene doesn’t really fit you, try coming up with your own visualization. Think of a place or situation that you find to be very relaxing, such as lying down in a large field of flowers and grass, or enjoying a beautiful view of a mountain or forest.
Visualizing a Goal
Another type of visualization is where you picture yourself achieving your goals . For instance, some athletes use visualization to improve their performance.
They might picture themselves feeling energetic on game day, walking out onto the field, and scoring a goal. Research shows that this type of visualization can help improve performance under pressure. But you don't have to be an athlete to practice this type of visualization.
If you're coping with symptoms of anxiety, you might visualize what it would feel like to be anxiety-free, or what positive feelings you're hoping to embody as you release tension and stress .
Say you have social anxiety . You're nervous about attending a birthday gathering for a friend because of how many people will be there, but you really want to go. You might visualize yourself going to the party, having fun, talking to people, and really enjoying yourself.
During your visualization, you might observe:
- What it feels like to have less anxiety in social settings
- How your mind is less focused on worrying
- How your body feels more relaxed and at ease
When the time comes to actually attend the party in real life, you might find it less anxiety-inducing simply because you've already visualized it going well. Visualizing positive mental representations of yourself can help improve symptoms of anxiety and boost your own self-image as well.
Compassion Meditation
Visualization is also a key component of other practices like compassion meditation. This type of meditation can help boost your mood and promote feelings of well-being. It's also a great way to show yourself greater self-love and self-compassion as you cope with anxiety.
To practice compassion meditation, find a quiet place to sit or lie down. Focus your attention inward or visualize yourself. Repeat a mantra such as "I am worthy of love and understanding."
You can practice compassion meditation to show yourself support when you're experiencing high levels of anxiety.
You might also choose to visualize a person or a situation that is bringing you any anxiety or stress. Visualizing someone you've had a disagreement with, for example, can help you foster greater understanding for them and release some of your anger or tension. Repeat a mantra such as "May this person feel peace and understanding," or "May I find peace in this situation."
Getting Started With Visualization for Anxiety
Before beginning any of these visualization exercises, make sure your environment is set up for your comfort. To better relax, eliminate any distractions, such as phones, pets, or television.
Try to find a quiet place where you will most likely be undisturbed.
Remove any heavy jewelry or restricting clothing, such as tight belts or scarves. Get ready to relax by either sitting or lying down in a position that feels comfortable to you.
To begin, it can be helpful to slow your breathing down with a deep breathing technique . Close your eyes and try to let go of any tension you may be feeling throughout your body. To relax your body and mind even further, it may also be beneficial to try a progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) exercise before you begin visualization. Try to set aside about five to 15 minutes to visualize.
How to Use Visualization for Anxiety
When visualizing your calming scene, think about what you are experiencing through all of your senses. Notice what you hear, smell, taste and how your body feels. When you feel ready to leave your relaxation scene, take your time and gradually return your mind to the present.
To improve visualization, try practicing several times a day. Relaxation techniques tend to be more helpful if you start practicing at a time when you are not experiencing high anxiety.
Through regular practice, you will be able to use visualization when you really need it, such as when you start feeling the physical symptoms of anxiety or panic .
Visualization is a great technique you can practice whenever you feel anxiety. If you're new to visualization, it may take some time to get used to it, so try to be patient. If you find visualization isn't helping your anxiety symptoms, you can also try other common relaxation techniques such as breathing exercises , yoga , progressive muscle relaxation, and meditation .
If you find you are struggling with anxiety symptoms, be sure to talk to a primary care doctor or a mental health professional such as a therapist who can help you find the best ways for you to cope.
If you or a loved one are struggling with an anxiety disorder, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area.
For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database .
Nguyen J, Brymer E. Nature-based guided imagery as an intervention for state anxiety . Front Psychol . 2018;9:1858. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2018.01858
Kozlowska K, Walker P, McLean L, Carrive P. Fear and the defense cascade: Clinical implications and management . Harv Rev Psychiatry . 2015;23(4):263-287. doi:10.1097/HRP.0000000000000065
Di Corrado D, Guarnera M, Guerrera CS, et al. Mental imagery skills in competitive young athletes and non-athletes . Front Psychol. 2020;11. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2020.00633
Moon K, Kim S, Kim J, Kim H, Ko Y gun. The mirror of mind: Visualizing mental representations of self through reverse correlation . Front Psychol. 2020;11. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2020.01149
Conversano C, Ciacchini R, Orrù G, Di Giuseppe M, Gemignani A, Poli A. Mindfulness, compassion, and self-compassion among health care professionals: What's new? A systematic review . Front Psychol . 2020;11:1683. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2020.01683
- Seaward, B. L. Managing Stress: Principles and Strategies for Health and Wellbeing , 7th Edition, 2011.
By Katharina Star, PhD Katharina Star, PhD, is an expert on anxiety and panic disorder. Dr. Star is a professional counselor, and she is trained in creative art therapies and mindfulness.
From Rejection to Resilience: Help Kids Face Social Anxiety
August 27, 2024
Love this video? You can find hundreds more like this inside the GoZen! programs .
Ah, rejection. It’s like broccoli—nobody really likes it, but the fact is it’s actually good for us. When you have social anxiety, the thought of the smallest bite… er, interaction, is loaded so much potential for bitter rejection that it feels like the only safe options is to stay quiet. But we all know we can’t live our lives silently.
If your kid has ever turned beet-red at the thought of asking a server for extra napkins, you know how severe social anxiety can be. But what if we told you that regular small doses of rejection could be the secret to overcoming it? (In truth, that’s not a bad strategy for the broccoli, either.)
Kids tend to treat rejection like the sky falling. Didn’t get invited to a birthday party? The world is ending. Got a “no” when you asked for a second dessert? Total catastrophe. But here’s a secret—rejection is just a message that says something like, “Try again, but possibly do it differently next time.” Or “Maybe this isn’t the right time to ask for a pony.”
So, how do we help kids see rejection as less of an apocalypse and more of a minor hiccup?
Enter exposure therapy . Exposure therapy is just a fancy way of saying, “practice makes perfect.” For kids with social anxiety, this means dipping their toes into situations where they might hear “no” and realizing that life goes on.
And speaking of practice, let’s talk about Jia Jiang, the guy who decided to make rejection his new hobby for 100 days straight. The video above is inspired by Jiang’s idea of “Rejection Therapy” . It turns out, with enough practice, getting rejected starts to sting a lot less.
So, how do you actually help your kids get comfortable with rejection? Here are some fun steps to try:
- Start with tiny “nos.” Kick things off with easy asks—like requesting a free donut at the coffee shop (hey, you never know!). Whether the answer is yes or no, the point is to get comfy with the idea that rejection isn’t the end of the world. Spoiler: It’s not even the end of snack time.
- Laugh it off. When the inevitable “no” comes, take a moment to laugh about it with your kid. “OM gosh… did you really just ask the grocery store clerk for a shopping reservation? That was awesome!” Nothing diffuses the fear of rejection like a good belly laugh.
- Celebrate the ask, not the answer. Whether your kid gets a yes or a no, celebrate the fact that they had the guts to ask. It’s like doing a cannonball into the pool; the splash is what counts, not whether you got everyone wet.
- Turn up the difficulty (slowly). As your child gets more comfortable, increase the challenge. Maybe it’s asking a new friend to hang out, or daring to answer a question in class. The more they practice, the less scary it gets. Who knows, they might even start finding the thrill in the “no.
- Make rejection a game. Watch the video above to see how it’s done and then turn rejection into a family sport. Whoever collects the most “nos” by the end of the week wins. Prizes could range from bragging rights to an extra scoop of ice cream.
With a little practice and a lot of laughs, your child will be ready to take on the world— one “no” at a time.
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Tips to Support a Child Struggling with Separation Anxiety
A psychologist shares back-to-school advice for parents of kids with separation anxiety, whether they are toddlers going to school for the first time or young adults moving away for college..
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The thought of starting a new school year is exciting for many kids – picking out a new backpack, reuniting with friends after summer vacation, and seeing their favorite teachers again. But for others, it can be a source of anxiety and dread.
School-related anxiety can be caused by many factors, but it is common in children who experience separation anxiety, explains Dr. Anne Marie Albano , director of the Center for Youth Mental Health at NewYork-Presbyterian. While some separation anxiety is normal, it can hinder children and young adults if left unaddressed for too long.
“It’s important to get ahead of school-related separation anxiety because school is an instrumental part of developing the whole person beyond just academics” says Dr. Albano. “It teaches children and young adults how to assert themselves, take care of themselves, and navigate relationships.”
Health Matters spoke with Dr. Albano to learn more about separation anxiety , how it is related to school avoidance, and what parents can do to help kids of all ages — from toddlers to teenagers — overcome their fears.
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Dr. Anne Marie Albano
What is separation anxiety? Separation anxiety in children is an exaggerated fear of being away from their parent or primary caregiver. It is an expected, typical experience between the ages of roughly 10 months to 2 years old.
As the child develops a sense of security that their parents will return, gains trust in babysitters or in daycare settings, and learns to soothe and distract themselves through play, they become more able to manage separations with minimal upset.
Most children will move through this phase with little difficulty, and many will experience brief episodes of separation concerns at different ages or in novel situations (such as the start of a new school year, being left with relatives while parents take a vacation, following an illness), all the way through adolescence and into early adulthood.
What are the signs of separation anxiety? In general, worries about new situations are normal. A parent may get “what if” questions (“What if I get sick and need you?” “What if something happens to you while I’m at college?”). It’s reasonable for that to last a few weeks. However, if the youth persists in asking many questions despite reassurance, becomes increasingly anxious, has sleep or concentration difficulties, or makes excuses for why they don’t want to separate, then the child or teen may need help in managing this anxiety.
Some signs of separation anxiety may be less obvious. In earlier childhood, it could mean declining invitations to birthday parties or outings with friends. Later, it could mean dropping out of extracurricular activities such as clubs, scouting, or sports; and in high school, declining invitations to travel with the family of a friend, go on an overnight class trip, or continue to go to camp.
Other behaviors that may not immediately raise concern but could be signs of separation anxiety include questioning the parents about where they will be through the day, frequently sending texts or calling to check on the parents, and getting upset or angry if the parent is not on time or where they are “supposed” to be.
Separation anxiety isn’t anyone’s fault, and it can happen for any reason. That said, many parents go out of their way to overly accommodate their child’s separation anxiety and avoid nudging them out of their comfort zone, which doesn’t help their condition. Instead, try encouraging your child to experience time away from home, whether that means staying over at a friend’s or relative’s house or trying sleepaway camp.
What are some ways that parents can help ease their kid back to school? Of course, you want to help your child overcome their back-to-school-related separation anxiety – but at the same time, it’s important to also validate their feelings. You should express confidence that your child is going to be OK without waving away their concerns.
Try to find ways to get them excited about going to school, whether it’s picking out an outfit together or going shopping for school supplies. For younger kids, sticker charts, or “reward charts,” can be a great way to track your child’s progress. Take a photo of them on their first day of school and hang it up. The point is to make your child proud of their successes.
For children with separation anxiety, it’s best to keep goodbyes short and sweet at school drop-off. This will not traumatize your child – it will help them in the long run. If they’re starting a new school, parents can ask permission to visit the school with their child and even meet their teacher before the first day. Arranging playdates with classmates also helps to settle a child with separation anxiety into the school routine and focus them on some of the social benefits of school. Additionally, having a buddy to commute or simply enter school with can help put your child more at ease.
Lastly, be sure your kids are getting at least eight hours of sleep a night – not just the week before school starts, but starting the month before school starts. A well-rested child can manage anxiety much better.
How do you know if a child needs professional help for their separation anxiety? If your child’s separation anxiety is lasting longer than the first two to three weeks of school, it’s probably time to seek professional guidance. Unfortunately, many parents often wait too long, thinking it’s just a phase – but the longer a child suffers with anxiety, the more it takes hold. A professional will help get to the root of the issue. You can start by talking to the teacher and seeing if there’s a school counselor, social worker, or psychologist who would be able to help your child.
Otherwise, it can help to see a clinician who specializes in cognitive behavior therapy . CBT can teach your child skills for proactively self-soothing and managing their anxiety, and it can also give parents direction on how to facilitate that development.
What are some tips on supporting teenagers with separation anxiety, especially when they are making the big life transition to college? I often tell parents to think of high school as their final four years to prepare your child for independence before college. You want your kids to be able to get used to being independent under your watchful eye, so that they can learn and make mistakes in a safe environment while you’re able to guide them. Again, encourage them to step out of their comfort zone, whether that means going away to camp or making their own doctor’s appointments.
If parents have always accommodated their child’s separation anxiety, their teenager might seem ready for college, but when it’s time to actually leave home, a panic sets in. If they haven’t spent time away from their parents, going away can feel extremely daunting, and they might realize until they move into campus that they are unable to handle everyday tasks without their parents’ help, like homework, making their own food, or doing their laundry.
During the first few weeks of college, I would recommend limiting phone calls to once a week, at least while your child adjusts to college life. The first few weeks of school are an important time for your teenager to get to know their new surroundings, peers, professors, and themselves. Of course, they can always call you if they’re in trouble or have a problem.
A warning sign that a young adult is not adjusting well to college is if they don’t use names when they tell you about their social life. If they use vague, generic language and don’t describe any of their new friends, it could mean that they’re having a tough time forming connections.
Each time a child moves up a grade in school, they are met with new and more difficult demands, whether it’s separating from their parents for the first time, making new friends, adjusting to routine, taking instruction from teachers, or managing larger workloads. But as long as children and young adults with separation anxiety are given the right tools to meet these challenges, they can thrive.
How to Navigate Back-to-School Separation Anxiety
Pre-School and Early Elementary School
- Keep drop-off goodbyes short and positive
- Encourage independent activities at home to build confidence
- Discuss the exciting aspects of school, like making new friends
Upper Elementary
- Encourage kids to get involved in a club or activity to make friends
- Listen attentively and engage in conversations about their school experiences
- Work together to develop strategies to tackle any specific social or academic problems
Middle School
- Support kids in taking on new responsibilities, like packing their own lunches
- Celebrate their involvement in sports or clubs that help build social connections
- Encourage communication about their interactions at school
High School
- Encourage them to communicate their needs and seek help when needed
- Support the development of good study habits and time management
- Allow kids to manage their own appointments and schedule
- Prepare kids to handle daily tasks like laundry, cooking, and budgeting
- Schedule regular, but spaced-out, verbal check-ins
- Look out for signs of struggle, like reluctance to discuss their experiences
At A Glance
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- Anne Marie M. Albano, Ph.D.
- The Center for Youth Mental Health
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How does social media affect mental health?
The pros of social media, the cons of social media, what’s driving your social media use, signs that social media is impacting your mental health, how to change your social media use, step 1: reduce time online, step 2: change your focus, step 3: spend more time with offline friends, step 4: express gratitude, helping a child or teen with unhealthy social media use, social media and mental health are you addicted to social media.
While many of us enjoy staying connected on social media, excessive use can fuel feelings of addiction, anxiety, depression, isolation, and FOMO. Here’s how to modify your habits and improve your mood.
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Human beings are social creatures. We need the companionship of others to thrive in life, and the strength of our connections has a huge impact on our mental health and happiness. Being socially connected to others can ease stress, anxiety, and depression, boost self-worth, provide comfort and joy, prevent loneliness, and even add years to your life. On the flip side, lacking strong social connections can pose a serious risk to your mental and emotional health.
In today’s world, many of us rely on social media platforms such as Facebook, X (formerly Twitter), Snapchat, YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram to find and connect with each other. While each has its benefits, it’s important to remember that social media can never be a replacement for real-world human connection. It requires in-person contact with others to trigger the hormones that alleviate stress and make you feel happier, healthier, and more positive. Ironically for a technology that’s designed to bring people closer together, spending too much time engaging with social media can actually make you feel more lonely and isolated—and exacerbate mental health problems such as anxiety and depression.
If you’re spending an excessive amount of time on social media and feelings of sadness, dissatisfaction, frustration, or loneliness are impacting your life, it may be time to re-examine your online habits and find a healthier balance.
Speak to a Licensed Therapist
BetterHelp is an online therapy service that matches you to licensed, accredited therapists who can help with depression, anxiety, relationships, and more. Take the assessment and get matched with a therapist in as little as 48 hours.
While virtual interaction on social media doesn’t have the same psychological benefits as face-to-face contact, there are still many positive ways in which it can help you stay connected and support your wellbeing.
Social media enables you to:
- Communicate and stay up to date with family and friends around the world.
- Find new friends and communities; network with other people who share similar interests or ambitions.
- Join or promote worthwhile causes; raise awareness on important issues.
- Seek or offer emotional support during tough times.
- Find vital social and professional connections (such as online therapy ) if you live in a remote area, for example, or have limited independence, social anxiety, or are part of a marginalized group.
- Find an outlet for your creativity and self-expression.
- Discover (with care) sources of valuable information and learning.
Since it’s a relatively new technology, there’s little research to establish the long-term consequences, good or bad, of social media use. However, multiple studies have found a strong link between heavy social media and an increased risk for depression, anxiety, loneliness, self-harm , and even suicidal thoughts .
Social media may promote negative experiences such as:
Inadequacy about your life or appearance . Even if you know that images you’re viewing on social media are manipulated, they can still make you feel insecure about how you look or what’s going on in your own life. Similarly, we’re all aware that other people tend to share just the highlights of their lives, rarely the low points that everyone experiences. But that doesn’t lessen those feelings of envy and dissatisfaction when you’re scrolling through a friend’s airbrushed photos of their tropical beach holiday or reading about their exciting new promotion at work.
Fear of missing out (FOMO) and social media addiction . While FOMO has been around far longer than social media, sites such as Facebook and Instagram seem to exacerbate feelings that others are having more fun or living better lives than you are. The idea that you’re missing out on certain things can impact your self-esteem, trigger anxiety, and fuel even greater social media use, much like an addiction. FOMO can compel you to pick up your phone every few minutes to check for updates, or compulsively respond to each and every alert—even if that means taking risks while you’re driving, missing out on sleep at night, or prioritizing social media interaction over real world relationships.
Isolation . A study at the University of Pennsylvania found that high usage of Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram increases rather decreases feelings of loneliness . Conversely, the study found that reducing social media usage can actually make you feel less lonely and isolated and improve your overall wellbeing.
Depression and anxiety . Human beings need face-to-face contact to be mentally healthy. Nothing reduces stress and boosts your mood faster or more effectively than eye-to-eye contact with someone who cares about you. The more you prioritize social media interaction over in-person relationships, the more you’re at risk for developing or exacerbating mood disorders such as anxiety and depression .
Cyberbullying. About 10 percent of teens report being bullied on social media and many other users are subjected to offensive comments. Social media platforms such as Twitter can be hotspots for spreading hurtful rumors, lies, and abuse that can leave lasting emotional scars.
Self-absorption. Sharing endless selfies and all your innermost thoughts on social media can create an unhealthy self-centeredness and distance you from real-life connections.
These days, most of us access social media via our smartphones or tablets. While this makes it very convenient to keep in touch, it also means that social media is always accessible. This round-the-clock, hyper connectivity can trigger impulse control problems, the constant alerts and notifications affecting your concentration and focus, disturbing your sleep, and making you a slave to your phone .
Social media platforms are designed to snare your attention, keep you online, and have you repeatedly checking your screen for updates. It’s how the companies make money. But, much like a gambling compulsion or an addiction to nicotine, alcohol, or drugs, social media use can create psychological cravings. When you receive a like, a share, or a favorable reaction to a post, it can trigger the release of dopamine in the brain, the same “reward” chemical that follows winning on a slot machine, taking a bite of chocolate, or lighting up a cigarette, for example. The more you’re rewarded, the more time you want to spend on social media, even if it becomes detrimental to other aspects of your life.
Other causes of unhealthy social media use
A fear of missing out (FOMO) can keep you returning to social media over and over again. Even though there are very few things that can’t wait or need an immediate response, FOMO will have you believing otherwise. Perhaps you’re worried that you’ll be left out of the conversation at school or work if you miss the latest news or gossip on social media? Or maybe you feel that your relationships will suffer if you don’t immediately like, share, or respond to other people’s posts? Or you could be worried you’ll miss out on an invitation or that other people are having a better time than you.
Many of us use social media as a “security blanket”. Whenever we’re in a social situation and feel anxious, awkward, or lonely, we turn to our phones and log on to social media. Of course, interacting with social media only denies you the face-to-face interaction that can help to ease anxiety .
Your heavy social media use could be masking other underlying problems , such as stress, depression, or boredom. If you spend more time on social media when you’re feeling down, lonely, or bored, you may be using it as a way to distract yourself from unpleasant feelings or self-soothe your moods. While it can be difficult at first, allowing yourself to feel can open you up to finding healthier ways to manage your moods .
The vicious cycle of unhealthy social media use
Excessive social media use can create a negative, self-perpetuating cycle:
- When you feel lonely, depressed, anxious, or stressed, you use social media more often—as a way to relieve boredom or feel connected to others.
- Using social media more often, though, increases FOMO and feelings of inadequacy, dissatisfaction, and isolation.
- In turn, these feelings negatively affect your mood and worsen symptoms of depression, anxiety, and stress.
- These worsening symptoms cause you to use social media even more, and so the downward spiral continues.
Everyone is different and there is no specific amount of time spent on social media, or the frequency you check for updates, or the number of posts you make that indicates your use is becoming unhealthy. Rather, it has to do with the impact time spent on social media has on your mood and other aspects of your life, along with your motivations for using it.
For example, your social media use may be problematic if it causes you to neglect face-to-face relationships, distracts you from work or school, or leaves you feeling envious, angry, or depressed. Similarly, if you’re motivated to use social media just because you’re bored or lonely, or want to post something to make others jealous or upset, it may be time to reassess your social media habits.
Indicators that social media may be adversely affecting your mental health include:
Spending more time on social media than with real world friends . Using social media has become a substitute for a lot of your offline social interaction. Even if you’re out with friends, you still feel the need to constantly check social media, often driven by feelings that others may be having more fun than you.
Comparing yourself unfavorably with others on social media . You have low self-esteem or negative body image. You may even have patterns of disordered eating.
Experiencing cyberbullying . Or you worry that you have no control over the things people post about you.
Being distracted at school or work . You feel pressure to post regular content about yourself, get comments or likes on your posts, or respond quickly and enthusiastically to friends’ posts.
Having no time for self-reflection . Every spare moment is filled by engaging with social media, leaving you little or no time for reflecting on who you are, what you think, or why you act the way that you do—the things that allow you to grow as a person.
Engaging in risky behavior in order to gain likes , shares, or positive reactions on social media. You play dangerous pranks, post embarrassing material, cyberbully others, or access your phone while driving or in other unsafe situations.
[ Read: Dealing with Revenge Porn and “Sextortion” ]
Suffering from sleep problems . Do you check social media last thing at night, first thing in the morning, or even when you wake up in the night? The light from phones and other devices can disrupt your sleep , which in turn can have a serious impact on your mental health.
Worsening symptoms of anxiety or depression . Rather than helping to alleviate negative feelings and boost your mood, you feel more anxious, depressed, or lonely after using social media.
If you feel that your social media use has become an addiction, or it’s fueling your levels of anxiety, depression, FOMO, or sense of isolation, the following steps can help you modify your habits :
A 2018 University of Pennsylvania study found that reducing social media use to 30 minutes a day resulted in a significant reduction in levels of anxiety, depression, loneliness, sleep problems, and FOMO. But you don’t need to cut back on your social media use that drastically to improve your mental health. The same study concluded that just being more mindful of your social media use can have beneficial results on your mood and focus.
While 30 minutes a day may not be a realistic target for many of us—let alone a full “social media detox”— we can still benefit from reducing the amount of time we spend on social media. For most of us, that means reducing how much we use our smartphones. The following tips can help:
- Use an app to track how much time you spend on social media each day. Then set a goal for how much you want to reduce it by.
- Turn off your phone at certain times of the day, such as when you’re driving, in a meeting, at the gym, having dinner, spending time with offline friends, or playing with your kids. Don’t take your phone with you to the bathroom.
- Don’t bring your phone or tablet to bed . Turn devices off and leave them in another room overnight to charge.
- Disable social media notifications. It’s hard to resist the constant buzzing, beeping, and dinging of your phone alerting you to new messages. Turning off notifications can help you regain control of your time and focus.
- Limit checks. If you compulsively check your phone every few minutes, wean yourself off by limiting your checks to once every 15 minutes. Then once every 30 minutes, then once an hour. There are apps that can automatically limit when you’re able to access your phone.
- Try removing social media apps from your phone so you can only check Facebook, Twitter and the like from your tablet or computer. If this sounds like too drastic a step, try removing one social media app at a time to see how much you really miss it.
For more tips on reducing your overall phone use, read Smartphone Addiction .
Many of us access social media purely out of habit or to mindlessly kill moments of downtime. But by focusing on your motivation for logging on, you can not only reduce the time you spend on social media, you can also improve your experience and avoid many of the negative aspects.
If you’re accessing social media to find specific information, check on a friend who’s been ill, or share new photos of your kids with family, for example, your experience is likely to be very different than if you’re logging on simply because you’re bored, you want to see how many likes you got from a previous post, or to check if you’re missing out on something.
Next time you go to access social media, pause for a moment and clarify your motivation for doing so.
Are you using social media as a substitute for real life? Is there a healthier substitute for your social media use? If you’re lonely, for example, invite a friend out for coffee instead. Feeling depressed? Take a walk or go to the gym. Bored? Take up a new hobby. Social media may be quick and convenient, but there are often healthier, more effective ways to satisfy a craving.
Are you an active or a passive user on social media? Passively scrolling through posts or anonymously following the interaction of others on social media doesn’t provide any meaningful sense of connection. It may even increase feelings of isolation. Being an active participant, though, will offer you more engagement with others.
Does social media leave you feeling inadequate or disappointed about your life? You can counter symptoms of FOMO by focusing on what you have, rather than what you lack. Make a list of all the positive aspects of your life and read it back when you feel you’re missing out on something better. And remember: no one’s life is ever as perfect as it seems on social media. We all deal with heartache, self-doubt, and disappointment, even if we choose not to share it online.
We all need the face-to-face company of others to be happy and healthy. At its best, social media is a great tool for facilitating real-life connections. But if you’ve allowed virtual connections to replace real-life friendships in your life, there are plenty of ways to build meaningful connections without relying on social media.
Set aside time each week to interact offline with friends and family. Try to make it a regular get-together where you always keep your phones off.
If you’ve neglected face-to-face friendships, reach out to an old friend (or an online friend) and arrange to meet up. If you both lead busy lives, offer to run errands or exercise together .
Join a club . Find a hobby, creative endeavor, or fitness activity you enjoy and join a group of like-minded individuals that meet on a regular basis.
Don’t let social awkwardness stand in the way . Even if you’re shy, there are proven techniques to overcome insecurity and build friendships .
If you don’t feel that you have anyone to spend time with, reach out to acquaintances . Lots of other people feel just as uncomfortable about making new friends as you do—so be the one to break the ice. Invite a coworker out for lunch or ask a neighbor or classmate to join you for coffee.
Interact with strangers . Look up from your screen and connect with people you cross paths with on public transport, at the coffee shop, or in the grocery store. Simply smiling or saying hello will improve how you feel—and you never know where it may lead.
Feeling and expressing gratitude about the important things in your life can be a welcome relief to the resentment, animosity, and discontent sometimes generated by social media.
Take time for reflection . Try keeping a gratitude journal or using a gratitude app. Keep track of all the great memories and positives in your life—as well as those things and people you’d miss if they were suddenly absent from your life. If you’re more prone to venting or negative posts, you can even express your gratitude on social media—although you may benefit more from private reflection that isn’t subject to the scrutiny of others.
[Read: Gratitude: The Benefits and How to Practice It]
Practice mindfulness . Experiencing FOMO and comparing yourself unfavorably to others keeps you dwelling on life’s disappointments and frustrations. Instead of being fully engaged in the present, you’re focused on the “what ifs” and the “if onlys” that prevent you from having a life that matches those you see on social media. By practicing mindfulness , you can learn to live more in the present moment, lessen the impact of FOMO, and improve your overall mental wellbeing.
Volunteer . Just as human beings are hard-wired to seek social connection, we’re also hard-wired to give to others. Helping other people or animals not only enriches your community and benefits a cause that’s important to you, but it also makes you feel happier and more grateful.
Childhood and the teenage years can be filled with developmental challenges and social pressures. For some kids, social media has a way of exacerbating those problems and fueling anxiety, bullying , depression , and issues with self-esteem.
If you’re worried about your child’s social media use, it can be tempting to simply confiscate their phone or other device. But that can create further problems, separating your child from their friends and the positive aspects of social media. Instead, there are other ways to help your child use TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, and other platforms in a more responsible way.
Monitor and limit your child’s social media use. The more you know about how your child is interacting on social media, the better you’ll be able to address any problems. Parental control apps can help limit your child’s data usage or restrict their phone use to certain times of the day. You can also adjust privacy settings on the different platforms to limit their potential exposure to bullies or predators.
Talk to your child about underlying issues. Problems with social media use can often mask deeper issues. Is your child having problems fitting in at school? Are they suffering from shyness or social anxiety? Are problems at home causing them stress?
Enforce “social media” breaks. For example, you could ban social media until your child has completed their homework in the evening, not allow phones at the dinner table or in their bedroom, and plan family activities that preclude the use of phones or other devices. To prevent sleep problems, always insist phones are turned off at least one hour before bed.
Teach your child how social media is not an accurate reflection of people’s lives. They shouldn’t compare themselves or their lives negatively to others on social media. People only post what they want others to see. Images are manipulated or carefully posed and selected. And having fewer friends on social media doesn’t make your child less popular or less worthy.
Encourage exercise and offline interests. Get your child away from social media by encouraging them to pursue physical activities and hobbies that involve real-world interaction. Exercise is great for relieving anxiety and stress , boosting self-esteem, and improving mood—and is something you can do as a family. The more engaged your child is offline, the less their mood and sense of self-worth will be dependent on how many friends, likes, or shares they have on social media.
More Information
- Study into wellbeing and social media - Details study linking time spent on social media with decreased wellbeing. (Penn Today, University of Pennsylvania)
- Impact on the mental health of young people - Briefing paper analyzing the impact of social media. (Centre for Mental Health)
- Linking child depression - How heavy Instagram and Facebook use may be affecting kids negatively. (Child Mind Institute)
- Hunt, Melissa G., Rachel Marx, Courtney Lipson, and Jordyn Young. “No More FOMO: Limiting Social Media Decreases Loneliness and Depression.” Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology 37, no. 10 (December 2018): 751–68. Link
- Riehm, Kira E., Kenneth A. Feder, Kayla N. Tormohlen, Rosa M. Crum, Andrea S. Young, Kerry M. Green, Lauren R. Pacek, Lareina N. La Flair, and Ramin Mojtabai. “Associations Between Time Spent Using Social Media and Internalizing and Externalizing Problems Among US Youth.” JAMA Psychiatry 76, no. 12 (December 1, 2019): 1266. Link
- Anderson, Monica. (2018, September 27). A majority of teens have been the target of cyberbullying, with name-calling and rumor-spreading being the most common forms of harassment. Pew Research Center: Internet, Science & Tech. Link
- Kross, Ethan, Philippe Verduyn, Emre Demiralp, Jiyoung Park, David Seungjae Lee, Natalie Lin, Holly Shablack, John Jonides, and Oscar Ybarra. “Facebook Use Predicts Declines in Subjective Well-Being in Young Adults.” PLOS ONE 8, no. 8 (August 14, 2013): e69841. Link
- Twenge, Jean M., Thomas E. Joiner, Megan L. Rogers, and Gabrielle N. Martin. “Increases in Depressive Symptoms, Suicide-Related Outcomes, and Suicide Rates Among U.S. Adolescents After 2010 and Links to Increased New Media Screen Time.” Clinical Psychological Science 6, no. 1 (January 1, 2018): 3–17. Link
- Ilakkuvan, Vinu, Amanda Johnson, Andrea C. Villanti, W. Douglas Evans, and Monique Turner. “Patterns of Social Media Use and Their Relationship to Health Risks Among Young Adults.” Journal of Adolescent Health 64, no. 2 (February 2019): 158–64. Link
- Primack, Brian A., Ariel Shensa, Jaime E. Sidani, Erin O. Whaite, Liu Yi Lin, Daniel Rosen, Jason B. Colditz, Ana Radovic, and Elizabeth Miller. “Social Media Use and Perceived Social Isolation Among Young Adults in the U.S.” American Journal of Preventive Medicine 53, no. 1 (July 2017): 1–8. Link
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Public speaking anxiety, also known as glossophobia, is one of the most commonly reported social fears. While some people may feel nervous about giving a speech or presentation if you have social anxiety disorder (SAD), public speaking anxiety may take over your life. The Best Online Therapy for Anxiety of 2024, Tried and Tested.
If you want to beat speaking anxiety, you need to stop focusing on yourself and point your focus outward. This shift isn't something that can happen instantaneously. It takes time, patience, and ...
Manage breathing. Engage in breathing exercises before delivering the speech. As mentioned earlier, slowing down breathing is a simple yet powerful way to downregulate the body. When feeling those familiar anxiety symptoms before giving a speech, practice slow, deep breaths.
Imagine that your presentation will go well. Positive thoughts can help decrease some of your negativity about your social performance and relieve some anxiety. Do some deep breathing. This can be very calming. Take two or more deep, slow breaths before you get up to the podium and during your speech. Focus on your material, not on your audience.
Controlled breathing exercises can help you manage immediate symptoms of presentation anxiety. Practice deep, slow breathing techniques regularly, especially before your presentation, and try some mindfulness techniques too. This can help lower your heart rate, reduce shaking, and promote a sense of calm. 4.
Showing kindness and generosity to others has been shown to activate the vagus nerve, which has the power to calm the fight-or-flight response. When we are kind to others, we tend to feel calmer ...
Compassionate Self-Parenting. Think of the anxious part of yourself as a young child, and try speaking to the anxiety like you'd speak to a child you care about. Ask yourself if it's anxiety ...
If you can have a 10 minute conversation on a topic, you can do a 10 minute presentation. If you can't talk with a friend for 10 minutes about it, then you don't know it well enough. Source: I deal with anxiety a lot, and my job is to give presentations.
Stop focusing on yourself and what other people are thinking of you. Focus on other people, try to be present, and make genuine connections. No one's perfect, so try to be in the moment and ...
When anxiety over public speaking creeps up, you may experience psychological and physical symptoms. Some psychological symptoms you might have include: feelings of intense worry and nervousness ...
Social anxiety disorder can be a chronic mental health condition, but learning coping skills in psychotherapy and taking medications can help you gain confidence and improve your ability to interact with others. ... giving a speech in public or making an important work presentation may trigger symptoms for the first time. Having an appearance ...
The fear of public speaking is the most common phobia ahead of death, spiders, or heights. The National Institute of Mental Health reports that public speaking anxiety, or glossophobia, affects about 40%* of the population. The underlying fear is judgment or negative evaluation by others. Public speaking anxiety is considered a social anxiety ...
However, whether it is giving a formal presentation to an audience or asking our boss for a raise, being comfortable speaking in public is an important skill to learn. Change is Possible. ... How to Get Help for Social Anxiety. The National Social Anxiety Center (NSAC) is an association of independent Regional Clinics and Associates throughout ...
Here are 10 tips for public speaking anxiety sufferers looking to improve. 1. Don't expect perfection. Perfection is an unrealistic expectation that distracts from your good work and amplifies your anxiety. Instead of aiming for perfection, celebrate your improvements and seek out continuous learning opportunities.
Public speaking anxiety is the #1 phobia which is often driven by the fear of being noticeably nervous. Debilitating symptoms include panic attacks, fear of blushing (Erythrophobia), fear of sweating (hyper-hidrosis, voice freeze (selective mutism), and dissociation. These symptoms are driven by obsessive worry and perfectionism.
Tips and techniques to manage presentation anxiety and help stop the fear of public speaking shared by public speaking coach Janice Tomich. About; Services. ... is considered a social anxiety disorder. More people don't want to be front and centre than do. Across the spectrum, glossophobia (fear of public speaking) touches. Read More Contact ...
7. Burn Off Energy by Doing Some Cardio. Moving your body and getting your heart pumping also releases endorphins which can help quell any pre-presentation anxiety. I've been known to do a few fast-walking laps around a conference centre to reduce the stress I feel before I deliver a speech or presentation.
This may be a way to help reduce anxiety during a presentation in real-time, but more research is needed on this. ... You can check out the National Social Anxiety Center for more on social ...
[email protected]; 202-244-0903. National Social Anxiety Center (NSAC): Chair, cofounder, NSAC DC representative (2014-present). Founder of Social Anxiety Help: psychotherapist in private practice, Washington, DC (1990-present). Has led >90 social anxiety CBT groups, 20 weeks each. Has provided individual or group CBT for.
beyond your presentation, you will be less anxious during the presentation. 2 3 Use techniques that create an expanded present moment where you do not think about future consequences. Listen to music, do physical activity, say a tongue twister, play a video game. 4 Take a slow, deep inhalation through your nose and fill your lower abdomen. Slowly
It can be especially difficult if you struggle with social anxiety or if you are a student who doesn't have a lot of experience talking in front of groups. Research suggests that 61% of university students in the U.S. fear public speaking. Fortunately, many strategies can help you build your confidence and strengthen your public speaking skills.
" For kids without social anxiety disorder who have a more moderate fear of class presentations, teachers could do a modified version of this graduated introduction to the concept ...
Matt Abrahams: Tips and Techniques for More Confident and Compelling Presentations A Stanford lecturer explains key ways you can better plan, practice, and present your next talk. 655 Knight Way
Basically, any of these presentation software tools can help you to quickly create a visually stunning presentation; all without having to speak in front of the class. They utilize audio, video, and/or animation to create informative videos that get the point across even more effectively than conventional presentations.
Anxiety is uncomfortable and distressing. If you regularly experience symptoms of anxiety, then you know how disruptive they can be to your everyday life. While getting professional treatment is important, there are also a number of self-help strategies that can be extremely helpful for managing symptoms of anxiety, including visualization.
So, how do we help kids see rejection as less of an apocalypse and more of a minor hiccup? Enter exposure therapy. Exposure therapy is just a fancy way of saying, "practice makes perfect." For kids with social anxiety, this means dipping their toes into situations where they might hear "no" and realizing that life goes on.
While it may seem like there's nothing you can do about the symptoms of social anxiety disorder or social phobia, in reality, there are many things that can help. The first step is challenging your mentality. Social anxiety sufferers have negative thoughts and beliefs that contribute to their fears and anxiety. These can include thoughts such as:
Stress isn't always bad. A little bit of stress can help you stay focused, energetic, and able to meet new challenges in the workplace. It's what keeps you on your toes during a presentation or alert to prevent accidents or costly mistakes. But in today's hectic world, the workplace too often seems like an emotional roller coaster.
A professional will help get to the root of the issue. You can start by talking to the teacher and seeing if there's a school counselor, social worker, or psychologist who would be able to help your child. Otherwise, it can help to see a clinician who specializes in cognitive behavior therapy. CBT can teach your child skills for proactively ...
Excessive use of social media can fuel anxiety, depression, FOMO and other mental health issues. Here's how to change your habits for the better. ... BetterHelp is an online therapy service that matches you to licensed, accredited therapists who can help with depression, anxiety, relationships, and more. Take the assessment and get matched ...